Surgury V/S Fear V/S Dying of my fat body

I am new here, I just found this site, and I am so glad.  I need so much help it isn't even funny.  I have been looking into surgury after 2 doctors talked to me about needing to loose weight and thinking I might be a candidate.  I am want to loose the weight where I can work on my infertility and try and get pregnant.  The doctor who found my infertility said to get the meds I need, I would have to loose around 100 pounds.  He suggested looking into WLS.  Then I went to another doctor for my severe Irritable Bowel Syndrome, GERD, and acid reflux.  I was talking to him about how the doctor had suggested it, but I didn't think I could with those digestive problems.  He said he saw no problem in it, and thought surgury and weight loss would help me with those as well.  On top of those problems I have diabetes (Type2) and I have a 4 times underactive thyroid.

My question is I go see my home doc. soon, and had planned on talking to him about this and getting a referral.  I truthfully am scared to death though.  I was leaning to the Lap Band (as was my hubby) because the others have such severe complications and risks.  I had a friend die from complications of her gastric bypass, and she was about my age in better health also.  I really want to loose the weight, and I have tried so many things but I can't seem to do it.  My question is what would you all having gone through some of these procedures suggest.. and or why. 
Is it worth the risk?  I fear dying... because I want to loose the weight to be a mom (I am not ready to give that dream up)  I also fear how I would afford this, and how or if I would need plastic surgury which I know would be expensive.  Also I am concerned about the pain, and the sickness that seems to be so relivant with a lot of you all.  See with my IBS My digestive track slows down and backs up some causing me to swell now... and I have acid reflux causing me to be sick some.. Already having these problems I wonder what would be good for me of it would make it just to unbearable...?

PLEASE HELP!!

you have to know that you arent alone. I am sure tons of us feel the same way.

I want the surgery very badly but as excited as I will be I will also be terrified... I used to be anti- WLS because the odds were much worse 1/100  and now they are something liek 1/1000  which is better but its scarey :(   I need to be a strong single mommy too...   I think your chances of dying from your comorbidities are higher than from the surgery but having known someone personally who died from it as you do... that would make it all the more scarey!

I just saw your post. I don't know if you are still looking for help since this is an "old post" about two weeks old.

I can relate to the fear of surgery somewhat but I was more afraid of dying in the next year or so.
A little background about my health.
I am type 2 diabetes insulin dependent 11 years and counting. I used 175 unit of insulin a day.
In Oct 08 I had a heart attack a stent was put in. March 09, May 09 I had two angina attacks which ended with more stents. All of this is because of the diabetes is making my arteries smaller.

On June 29th 2009 I had a gastric sleeve done in Mexico I spent $7500 for doctor, hospital, hotel and $73 for medicines. I have lost 26 pounds, my weight loss has been slow because I do not exercise and I am still taking insulin only 40 units a day. My A1C went from 8.9 to 7.9 in six weeks. This included 2 months of bad reading as well, so you can get an idea of how well my glucose is now.

For a diabetic I do not recommend a the Lap Band. I think that it works but not for diabetics meaning you may still have high numbers even after weightloss. If you want your diabetes resolved look into RNY, DS or Sleeve. It has to do with an incision being made in the stomach that helps us diabetics. RNY and DS claim that is best for diabetes the sleeve has worked well for me.

I would not worry about the pain it only lasts a day or two. Some people a week but it is worth it.
You do not always need plastic surgery. I would first worry about where to get the money/approval for the WLS surgery then once that is done and if you need plastics I would worry about that.

I recommend WLS surgery for anyone who is overweight but specially for someone with Diabetes. Also you insurance may cover it. If you do not have insurance you could go to MX. Lot of people get it done there.  Check out seminars, some doctors offer on-line as well. All these questions you should pose to the surgeon as well. I hope this helps and best of luck to you on your WLS quest.

Thank you both for your info.. You were very helpful.  I am type 2 diabetic, but still on pills.  I talked to my  family doctor about it and he gave me the number of someone to call to see about seeing a seminar and talking with their staff.  I have yet to do it, because of fear.  I am once again attempting to loose weight on my own, though I don't know how strong that will be or hold.  I am still considering wls it just scares me so much.  Once again ty and God Bless.

I think that you need to weigh your options. You want to be a mom, be healthier, get rid of your acid reflux, IBS and type 2 Diabetes. These are great goals!

As a mother of a 2 year old, and about to have surgery.. I have asked myself, is this worth dying for? The posibility of dying is always there.

The answer I gave myself was. I can maybe die during surgery, or I can die from being obese. Dying from being obese is going to happen for sure. Dying from surgery probably won't.

This turned into a debate, what are the things that I would gain from WLS and what would I give up or possibily have to live with for the rest of my life.

My gain list started like this: i'd have a better life with my family, i will be able to fly on an airplane, ill be able to shop at normal clothing stores, ill be able to be more active.. I wont be embarrassed.

My give up list went like this... I'll have to monitor what I eat, I can't have soda anymore.

What would you gain and what would you lose with surgery? Make that list for yourself and then decide if this is the right choice for you.

I understand your concerns and I had the same.  I new of people who had the gastric bypass and had many complications and one who passed away.  The lap band is what I chose because it is the safest.  The surgery itself was 45 minutes start to finish and I went home the same day. Initially I lost about 100 pounds in 8 months but now it is more difficult. I sought of thought it was a quick fix.  It still requires the same comittment as dieting because foods such as ice cream go down easier than beef.  All in all the positive factor is it is an excellant mweight maintanance tool I have not gained back any weight and in all fairness I have not been following the program that well the last few months due to stress etc.  I would do it again in a minute.  I did the surgery so hopefully I would be alive in thrity years to see my children grow  up .  I have thyroid problems and I know how hard it is.  Best of luck to you.     

Thank you both for your replies.  I am still considering, but my doctor has me trying a diet pill in teh mean time.  I have really gotten what I eat down with this, and I am starting to loose some.  Whether this is going to help in the long run I don't know think so, but I am trying to learn from this and train myself and my body to want and need less.. and my hands to stop giving my mouth more.  I have considered both gastic adn the lapband.. I was really leaning ot the lapband because of safety reasons until I found out about all the complications.. and was afraid with my IBS and stomach swelling at times bloating that I would have to be out a lot of costs and trouble to unfill and refill and unfill.. you get the picture..   My doctor wants me to go to the free seminar that the WLS Doctors put on... He thinks that will give me a better understanding and then see about getting a evaluation.  So I am getting closer, but truthfully hoping I can change on my own, even though I know it is going to take longer....   Though I haven't and won't knock WLS out the door either...  I guess I am at a wait and see place if that makes sense.  Thank you all again for your help.. it means more than you truly know!

The lap band is horrible.  I can't begin to remember how many people have changed from the band to sleeves, bypass, or DS.  Huge numbers.  The list of potential complications is very long with banding.

Have you looked into the sleeve?  That is the safest surgery long term with much better weight loss than banding.