Not get anyone support from my husband
Consult a lawyer about divorce and keeping custody of your boys. Talk to a therapist to start working on your emotional issues. Think of this as a new chance at life and eventually an opportunity to find a partner who does support you and want the best for you.
Real life begins where your comfort zone ends
I just responded to your exercise post. I'm so sorry to hear this about your husband. Like I said with the exercise, start where you're at. Try to find outside support for yourself, like a support group, I'm not even thinking weight loss but a therapy group, and maybe even for domestic violence - which isn't only getting hit, but emotional and/or verbal abuse as well. As I read your post Beyoncé's song started whirling around in my head, Break my soul." Lyrics, "You won't break my soul." Start listening to some uplifting music, whatever that is for you. You deserve to LIVE!