Supportive to Bitter...

Most of my family has gone from being super supportive, to bitter about my weight loss. I can no longer update my mom on my weight loss like I used to because she gets annoyed and says "it must be nice. Stop bragging." And tries to force me to eat normal size portions. I feel like I can't talk about my weight loss or struggles with any of my family because they get irritated or jealous.

Anyone else go through this?

No. But it's about them, not you. Don't internalize that BS. And tell your mom that eating big portions will physically harm you and ask her if she wants to harm her child.

Not here but this is a great reason to go to support groups, or belong to online ones. People who haven't been thru it don't understand it.

That sucks. But, it sounds like they're setting their boundaries, so you should respect those boundaries and stop talking about your weight loss with them. Perhaps it would help to talk with a therapist instead?

I agree with Gwen. They may not be doing it because they aren't happy for you. But if those people have weight issues as well, then your continued success at losing is probably making them feel bad about their own issues. I have a sister who is still SMO, and I stopped saying anything to her about my weight loss when I saw the hurt in her eyes. She didn't say anything, but I could see that it was making her feel bad about herself, so I stopped (she wants WLS but her insurance doesn't cover and she can't afford self-pay). She's super proud of me, and says so, but I never talk about it in her presence anymore unless SHE brings up the subject.

As for your mom and the portion sizes, I bet she doesn't even realize what she's doing, but on a subconscious level she maybe wants you to be bigger so she feels better. Just politely decline the larger portions and if she continues, explain that eating that much could cause damage and put you in the hospital.

Talk about that stuff here, or only to your still supportive family members and friends, or a good therapist. Don't let the naysayers project their misery on you. Hang in there!!

Oh, one question: Do you talk at length about what you eat? It might sound harsh, but one's diet isn't usually a topic of interest out in the "real world". It's intersting here among us, don't get me wrong.

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Nope...it's usually just a simple "I've lost 10lbs this month!" not something I talk about every day or even every week

Well, if you do need their support, maybe you can have a conversation. Find out why they might be acting that way and explain your needs. Maybe you can find accord. That said, I really do think this is more about the mirror it holds to them than to you. I?d be happy if I saw my kid be happy and would never tell them to ?stop bragging? ? that?s some emotionally withholding crap right there. The impulse to take your own kid down a peg is totally bizarre to me.

For my part, my mom says something kind about my progress every time she sees me. But just to show that we all have different emotional needs, I actually don?t really need her to?I know when I?m doing well or not doing well. In fact, I?d rather not talk about it all the time. The WLS and staying on trac****upies so much of my headspace right now that I don?t feel the need to talk about it beyond OH or occasionally with other WLS IRL friends. I guess my rambling point is, we all need different kinds of support. If you need a certain kind, you should ask for it. If you can't get it from family, look for it elsewhere.

This is NOT about you. Do not make it so....It is them looking in the mirror and seeing what they COULD be but don't have the courage( or money) to make the changes necessary. Do not allow them to push you into eating more. Eat before you go, and if something you want/desire have only a few bites. You can truthfully say I have already eaten....

I would not say anything else to them Period about MY process. If they want to know they will ask....in time. Meinwhile , you need a support group in actuality, and probably on line. Someone you can bounce ideas off of...that you can get here. The high fives here are virtual.Some people require more and some less it is up to you and your needs.

Check with your Surgeon and see if he has a support group in your area.

Stop talking about it. Seriously. Unless they ask and then just answer their question and move on quickly to another subject.

It does sound like bragging after a while and it is annoying. I know we are excited when we are in the losing stage, and want to shout from the rooftops, but no one else really needs to hear every detail. Find a support group where you can talk about your loss and get support.