Struggling
on 7/19/18 6:42 am
I have learned over the past five years that we change. People don't always change who we have known. We actually see them for who they are.
We become stronger and are taking care of us and not just being someone else'*****hing bag.
Our lives do focus just around WLS like Grim Said. Some people I have been friends with no longer bother with me. They were just eating buddies or drinking buddies.
taking care of our physical and mental health is important.
I can be alone now and it's not loneliness. I can also be in a room of a 100 people and be lonely.
change does happen. Trying to figure out what we like and what we like to do is a part of life after WLS.
I'm sorry. I'm glad you've got therapy coming up, I hope it's beneficial.
Losing friendships, for any reason, is often sad. Even if it's for a good reason, there can be a lot of nostalgia involved.
VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)
Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170
TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)
This one was really hard for me too. Everyone was life long friends, great support but as soon as I started to look better and lose they were terrible. They either dropped me or tried to sabotage me. I lost a lot of fake friends, but found diamonds galore, through this site, and my surgeon's support group.
This will hurt for a bit but take them out with the garbage girl and surround yourself with diamonds
HW:330 - GW:150 - MW:118-125
RW:190 - CW:130
on 7/19/18 2:29 pm - Amarillo, TX
Thank you for the replies.
yes, i'm Coming to a hard realization that people I once thought of as sisters only wanted me as I was...not as I am now. While I still struggle with BPD and all sorts of anxiety I somehow am a threat to some. It's a hard pill to swallow.
i learned before I even had surgery not to talk about WLS with a great deal of people. Family, old friends and newer friends alike. I knew that this could happen from reading here and from a few people i've Known who had WLS. I just didn't want to believe it I guess.
Do any of you know of any FB groups that you like? I've tried a few like bariatricpal and a few others. Not a fan so far. I have trouble in support groups thanks to the anxiety issues
Mel
Most all of the WLS facebook groups I've seen are all about backpatting people for eating really stupid **** :/ That's why I stick to OH, I prefer the honesty.
VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)
Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170
TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)
on 7/19/18 3:19 pm - Amarillo, TX
I found its much like that and then some people are extremely rude or know it all.
OH has been the only place I've found that people are honest and respectful.
Mel
Hey Melody...
you'll eventually find out who your friends really are! my co-workers were the same.. and they were mostly women.. i had ONE "friend" who called me a skinny ***** and all that changed was my clothing size.. NOTHING else!! and yes... i found the people i met in support groups have been my new friends and of course having the same "interest".. totally understood each other!! funny how when people get healthier all the green monsters come out!!
good luck!!
take care of you
Lexxi
