A week away from surgery

Hi, I'm just over a week out from surgery and I need to know... knowing what you know now would you still have your surgery? And what do you wish you would've known going into it?

100% yes! I don't think there is anything I wish i'd Known - I used my 6 months to learn as much as I could. I can say that reading about it is different than going through it - but you only experience it once you do it!

I am thrilled that I was able to have a VSG over 2 years ago. I felt quite prepared by the day of surgery so there were no real surprises except that recovery was somewhat easier than I expected (less pain than I anticipated and no nausea). I guess the only sort of surprise was how terrible my stomach skin and face looked after losing over 100 pounds (hence my TT and facelift).

I've 4.25 years post-op and I've never once regretted my surgery. I'm so grateful that I did it.

Pre-op, I read as many of the posts in the VSG and RNY forums as I could. I spent days reading and learning. Based on that, I made myself these promises and they helped me quite a bit:

1. I will not panic if I stop losing weight for a few weeks.Instead, I will re-evaluate that my eating is on plan and wait until the stall has lasted 4 weeks before I start to panic.
2. I will not ask OH what I need to take to the hospital, I know these things. Chapstick and a pillow. And the pillow really just needs to be in the car for the trip home.
3. I will not lie when people ask me how I've lost the weight. I will either be honest and tell them "surgery, diet and exercise" or I will tell them "I'm not comfortable talking about this with you." These are the options, lying by omission is not one of them.
4. If I screw up, and I will screw up, I will forgive myself and return immediately to plan. It's okay to screw up, it's not okay to beat myself up for it or let it become the start of a downward spiral. It's also not okay to say "I'll return to plan tomorrow."
5. If I don't start losing sizes right away, I won't freak out. Chances are the clothes I wear now are too small and tight, and I just deal with it.It might take awhile for my current clothes to fit correctly and that will happen before I can get into smaller sizes. (This was true, I think I lost about 50 pounds before needing to buy new clothes.)
6. I will own my mistakes.They're mine and result of my own choices, no one is ever going to hold a gun to my head and make me eat crap, I control what goes into my own body.
7. I will not compare my weight loss to that of anyone else. I'm me.
8. I will do everything I can to find a therapist I can work with. This will help me out in the long run. (Therapy = awesome. Our stomachs are never what make us obese - our brains do that. Surgery will fix our stomachs and give us a powerful tool, but we need to fix our brains so that we can sustain this forever.)
9. I will be hyper aware of potential addiction transfer issues and especially aware of getting too caught up in numbers as I already know I am want to do.
10. Extra skin is a fact of life, get the **** over it. If I really hate the way my body looks, I can save my pennies and nickels for plastic surgery once I've maintained for a year or two. People will still have sex with me if I have weird skin, and lots of places sell compression gear. I will, however, have every issue with my skin documented. (This didn't happen as planned, but hey, life rarely does. People did still have sex with me even if I had weird skin.)
11. I will be kind to myself.I will keep getting to my monthly massages, I will keep engaged in my hobbies, and I will spend time with my friends.
12. I already know that being a "hero" about medication is stupid so I'll work on remembering that when the time comes.Pain keeps us from healing, it's not noble.
13. I will only weigh myself once a week. I will not let myself get obsessed with the scale. See #9. (LOL, this definitely didn't happen. I weigh daily, but I don't obsess thanks to TrendWeight.)
14. My stomach will probably gurgle after surgery, this is normal.Just don't go to silent Meeting anytime soon.
15. I will not worry if people don't comment on my weight loss. I will assume that they're being polite and not commenting on another person's body, which is what they should do. (I wish people didn't comment on my body.)
16. I will work to break the compulsions to "clean my plate" and to "not let food go to waste."Sure, there are starving kids in Africa, but throwing away food will not change the situation.
17. There is nothing to be done for hair loss, assuming that I'm eating on plan. It will happen, or it won't, but I will remember that it will grow back eventually. I will be a shavee with St. Baldricks six weeks post-op. (And I've kept my hair short ever since.)
18. I understand that my hormones will be all messed up after surgery.I will do my best to remove myself from the company of others instead of taking my hormonal changes out on them.
19. I won't weigh myself for the first two weeks post-op because I know that I'll gain weight from all of the fluids and swelling that surgery entail. I'll wait to weigh until I'm off liquids. (I made it one week...)
20. I will not panic if I don't feel restriction immediately post-op. Chances are restriction won't kick in fully until I'm eating dense proteins and that will take 4-6 weeks on my plan. (This, indeed, was the case. I never had any issue with liquids.)

Other things I wish I had known:

• Life will still happen, your dad will still die, you'll need to gain all the coping skills and tools you can in order to make it through that without reverting to your old habits. But you can do it.
• Body dysphoria is real. Take pictures of yourself with other people for reference. Take pictures of yourself in the same doorway of your home. Look at these pictures so you can get a sense of your body. Talk to your therapist about it. Time will help. It's weird to feel disconnected from your body.
• Apparently you have an eating disorder, who knew! Thankfully your weight loss will help you feel confident enough to talk to your doctor about it and get treatment.
• People will make all sorts of comments about your body, your hair, your clothing, etc. It's annoying.
• Clothing is expensive. Apparently you will come to love bright colors and clothes that fit well - who knew? Good fitting bras are super important. Ditto for shoes.
• You'll learn to love exercise and even running. What the hell? All weather running gear is expensive but totally worth every penny.
• Your butt will hurt a lot since, apparently, there are bones there. Your PSIS (posterior superior iliac spine) will also hurt. It sucks, you'll survive.
• You will be cold all the freaking time. You will acquire a robust jacket and coat collection as a result and learn to take a jacket of some sort everywhere you go regardless of what the temperature should be.

What Gwen said so much more eloquently than I could!

Knowing what I know now I would've started documenting my weight earlier so that I could've gotten the surgery sooner! lol I'm not regretting it at all.

I also researched everything pretty thoroughly pre op so I've not run into any surprises.

Almost 6 years out and did have complications in the beginning but don't regret it at all. Best decision I ever made! You will stall and stop losing weight and don't get discouraged because it is normal. You might screw up and eat stuff that you shouldn't, I know I did it just forgive yourself and get back on track. Everyone is different, don't compare yourself to how fast others lose or what goes wrong with one person doesn't mean it will happen to you. I wish that someone would have told me to get therapy because yes they make you go for the psych eval but they don't tell you that you need it to help you along the way. Weighing yourself everyday will drive you crazy!! I ended up hiding it and just doing it once a week. You will have hair loss but the good news is it does grow back! You learn to work with what you got. You will be cold all the time! Anemia is pretty common after surgery and I do have malabsorption problems but yes you will always be the coldest in the room. This journey never stops and it takes work but you can do it!!

"you will screw up and eat things that you shouldn't...".

twith all due respect, this is not a true statement. There are ppl on this site you choose NOT to screw up and eat off plan. Please don't include EVERYONE in your statements cause you don't know everyone, do you?

I'm sorry I didn't mean it in a disrespectful way at all or to offend anyone! Of course I don't mean everyone I shouldn't have used that word and I did say in my post that every person is different and not to compare with anyone else. Although, it is common to slip up and I was just trying to say that if anyone should slip up not to let it ruin your hard work and to bru**** off and keep going. Kudos to you for never eating off plan or making a mistake thats awesome for you.

Something else I just remembered which was weird: I had a super elevated sense of smell for a couple of months. I could smell the fertilizer in the garage from a couple of rooms away. Whatever was the strongest smell in a food store hit me at the door and I could smell all the foods as I walked through.

I never lost any hair btw (at least not noticeably). Not everyone does. Nor does everyone have all the experiences mentioned above, but if they happen to you now you won't be surprised.