Ever feel like giving up on trying to have surgery?

Haha. I was envisioning discussions with close friends who might be willing to help out. Marriage is just a legal document but, that document happens to open doors to medical coverage.

That just seems a way that a person could be abused. Marriage may only be a legal document, but it requires some work to undo. I can see it going all horribly wrong.

Yes - it's definitely easier in some states than in others to get divorced. So that would be something the OP would need to look in to first. I would assume that, if the OP were to consider my suggestion, she would do some research first and talk a LOT with the whomever she married beforehand. Not just run out, pick someone up off the street, and drag them to the courthouse tomorrow :)

Even with lots of discussion, it seems ridiculously mercenary to marry only for medical coverage and possibly dangerous for someone to do so. It puts me in mind of mail order brides.

I am gobsmacked you are proposing this. Do you really have so many people whom you can use in such a manner, or do you not consider this using someone?

Like I said, I only got married for the legal benefits. So it doesn't seem mercenary to me.

Thankfully I do have a number of friends who would be willing to legally marry a close friend in order to get that friend the medical care they need. (Go figure, this is something we've actually talked about in my friend circle. We're weird.) I would do the same for a friend if I were in the position to do so. I don't consider it using someone, I consider it finding ways to navigate a broken health care system.

Also in your case it was with your partner and friend you had been with a Long time so it made sense. I can totally understand that.

Haha, not really :) In my case it was guy I'd met online, spent 10 days with in real life, got engaged to, and then married. Over the course of about 2 years. So, sure, it's a different cir****tance than the OP's, since I get the feeling she doesn't have a partner of any sort right now, but perhaps she has close friends that could help.

I had no idea my suggestion would bother so many people. It seemed pretty innocuous to me.

I suspect VERY few people are in a social position to do what you did.

Just because it worked for you doesn't mean it would work for others.

It's definitely not an option that would work for everyone, I agree. But I still think it's worth the OP considering - even if only briefly - before discounting.

(My situation was definitely different than the OP's too. Just wanted to make it clear that my partner and I hadn't been together for a "long time" before choosing this option!)

Wow pretty wild... and it all has worked out perfectly for you. Different strokes for different folks!

i am not bothered by it but I am not super conservative.

I agree with you if she had an old true blue friend who didn't expect anything in return. She would not need to live with him. Sadly that might be a hard friend to find. For me anyway if I did not have my husband! I can't think of anyone I could ask! lol!