Teddy-pet crying leading to Emotional Eating ( for Mommy) and Over-feeding for Comfort

We had a very traumatic day yesterday due to having to get first kitten shots at the vet.

I think my little girl who was neglected and traumatized as a baby feels she might be being rejected or de-homed when she goes in a crate or a car because she starts wailing hysterically and literally clinging to my neck, my hair , my clothes with ALL her tiny claws fully extended as if she was about to be ripped away ... she tucks her little head in my neck and just SOBS with all her tiny might into my ear ... its so sad .

Then when let out of the crate she tried to hide in my down jackets hood .. and it took two employees and the vet to extract her... yowling snarling spitting and clawing all the way. You wouldn?t believe what a fight a tiny no-weight kitten can put up when she feels endangered and frightened. Of course Mommy wants to cry seeing her pleading disbelieving eyes that Mommy is watching her get hurt while she?s being manhandled ( and then get a painful shot !) She wouldn?t even LOOK at me going home or after being let go almost all evening night and into the next day - she just hid.

The boy ( Mini) turned out to have fleas .. which thank God he didn?t yet infect her with . But the prescription is to give him regular flea baths .. and combing with a flea comb which his long fur makes difficult and maybe a bit painful. So he growls and even takes a nip or two at my hand.. and this has to be done every few days until all the flea eggs hatch and are dispatched . Needless to say he?s stopped following me to the shower-room like he used to ..before he got regularly grabbed and bathed .

So we have two traumatized kittens and a traumatized pet-mom. I try to get them to accept the inevitable ( daily brushing which is a necessity with long coats that can mat), weekly claw clipping , with cat -treats which they love .. and also train them to come when theyre called with using treats and even feeding their regular food as a reward after a training session.

But yesterday I started doubting myself. The Vet said both kittens are overweight judging by the fat on their tummies . Even though the little girl is tiny he says she should get less food .. and the boy is HUGE- long, tall and fat .. and he said if his diet isn?t controlled he might become very overweight.

He told me to stop leaving out dry food. This would all make sense if one wasn?t an aggressive eater ( the boy) and one a very shy slow eater ( the little girl) . I have tried to separate them and fed him in a bathroom before but he gets very angry and I?ve forgot him there a few times so he detests the bathroom .. and even peed in the wrong place ( not in the clean box in the bathroom) which i definitely found discouraging ( i had marking problems thank God resolved from anxiety with the little girl... but am terrified it might start up again particularly if he marks too).

Also when he?s separated from the food- I have to leave him there for a while because she eats a few bites, cleans herself, sleeps , then deigns to a few bites again. Getting a meal in her takes HOURS . Whereas the SECOND he?s let out of the bathroom he ( understandably ) scarfs down all the soft food probably because he?s been hungry for it for what seems like forever) yes i feed him a bit there but not a whole meal - because i know hell eat her leftovers too) .

This is why I stopped feeding them separately- he calmed down and learned I wouldn?t tolerate him pushing her away from the bowl. She also got a bit more confident and maybe more hungry ..because she holds her place now and eats quite a bit more bites than she used to.

I?m also thinking that the vet ( understandably ) wasn?t crazy about wild little Tilly .. could he be just being a bit mean telling me to stop leaving out food for her ? She eats VERY VERY little at a time and is still totally under the weight she should be according to her age. So what if she has a tiny protective fat layer on her tummy ? Like in little kids - this might be helping her grow . Ive never heard of putting a tiny kitten on a diet - have you?

All of this is making ME eat extra bites and obsess about food lol... and the plaintive looks from the hungry boy in the corner aren?t helping.. nor is the hiding and running away by little Tilly who hasn?t even ventured forth from her two inch hiding place behind a huge armoire to eat dinner or breakfast OY !!

Another thought- what if I switch the dry kitten food out for higher fiber lower calorie weight control indoor cat food? Does that work or do the overweight cats just eat more ?

I hope all you pet loving people out here will share some helpful suggestions - thanks ! ((()))

We have 3 cats. All of them hate the vet visit. But it is for their benefit.

I talk to them while we drive there, telling them why we have to go there. I talk to them and handle them in the vet office, explaining why we doing to them the things we do. I often assist the vet. Holding them with strong yet loving hands. I know I am doing right by them. Even when what do they don't like it. I took your them as we are driving home. Once home- I let them out of the "soft carrier" bag and allow them to be upset at me. I don't like talking then to the vets but I know they need that and it is for their health. I don't feel guilty or cry over them. It is what it is. They get it.

I have 3 cats .... two almost 11 year olds and a 5 year old. I use to feed my 2 cats when they were younger a can each of fancy feast in the morning and a can each at night. I also left a bowl of dry food out. They were skinny until about two and then they got very fat and so I totally cut out the dry food completely and they both dropped to a much better normal weight. I have heard that wet food is better for cats then dry. I think better for their kidneys and urinary tract. I know wet is more $. With 3 cats I go thru 6 tiny fancy feast cans a day! Since 3 cats, I split 3 cans so they each get little of 3 different flavors morning and night. They still beg! They also love the cat temptation brand treats. My cats are indoor cats and I have scratching posts... mine have never marked (knock on wood) very spoiled! plus I have a dog! Love animals. Good luck with your kittens!

Thanks ! :)

How can I make photos smaller?

Adorable! The bottom one reminds me of a kitten I had named Oliver! I bought him at age 15 at the mall for $40 someone had a basket of kittens! I had confirmation $ (had made my confirmation (Catholic religious sacrament) a week or so before and I had separated from my parents and bought him! They were upset with me but let me keep him as he was adorable just like yours but blue eyes! Unfortunately he died at 3 while we were on vacation.... he got a urinary tract blockage and did not get to the vet in time by pet sitter while we were away. Heartbreaking.

Enjoy them they look very very sweet. Animals are wonderful. Unconditional love. My teenage daughter (14) just said something so mean on way home after day of shopping and buying her a couple things! I told her that was so mean I would never say that to my Mother! She told me she is not me! She was in a mood and 8th grade but I was hurt!

I have had a few long hair cats over the years but my 3 now are all short hair. You are right about the longer ones needing combing I don't think I did it daily but once week or so.

Are yours indoor cats?

Ill occasionally allow them out for a few hours but only thoroughly supervised.

My home has a beautiful 1 1/2 acre ( landscaped , not wild ) yard so they cant get into too much trouble .. I hope. When I lived in Brooklyn the backyard was totally fenced and safer .. but i feel cruel never letting them out even in great weather .

Unfortunately the suburbs are fox and raccoon and stray cat infested so they definitely needed the shots.

My cats are indoor cats. Cats I had growing up tended to roam especially the males. Have you had the female spaid and male altered yet? I lost a cat that use to roam, even though altered and hit by a car and killed. Me and my husband (boyfriend at the time) found him. It was so sad and traumatic even now and it happened when I was 18! (I am now 51). Growing up we always had indoor/outdoor cats. Sometimes they would also disappear for days. Once I was older and on my own my cats were always indoor cats. Some don't like it maybe the first year but they get use to it and don't care after. I don't think it is cruel they are safe and run of the house. I have a big house with 3 floors with lots of sun and windows and beds to snuggle on. They are healthy , happy and clean. Live a long time .. couple to 19!! For me it is the traumatic experience I had. One I will never forget. I live in the suburbs in Connecticut and we have coyotes, Fox, raccoons and some other terrible mink like animal (forget the name) that is supposed to be vicious and go for the stomachs and throats of its prey. Written about in our local paper.

personal decision for everyone and I am sure many cats do just fine going out most of mine growing up did.

hope your day was better.

They're a good size. When you're writing a post they're huge, but they posted well. :)

And such beautiful babies! I have 4, 3 long hair and one short. To be honest, we shave our 3 long haired. Everybody's happier--they're cooler and they don't have any pulling mats hurting them, and we're not trying to convince them to let us brush them and dealing with hair all over the house. Of course, I live in Southern California and they're exclusively indoor cats, so they don't need their coats even though it's "winter". At the beginning we had to really work on Freeway and Aria to get them to accept it, but now they'll both just lie there and not fight, and Aria even gives us special little signs that she wants to be shaved. Slurpee was born in our house and he's never known anything different, so to him it's just normal life.

Your little girl may take a while, but she'll come around. Aria was a rescue from an abusive home, and for a long time she wouldn't go anywhere near my husband. But now he's the one she yells at when she wants a shave! She needs times to forget, and time in a home with people who would never, ever hurt her.

Oh, and car rides freak the crap out of Monkey, and she wails her head off every time we go to the vet. But oddly enough she settles down and starts purring if I start playing Jim Croce's greatest hits. Weird, I know. It worked with my cat, Bertram, who I had growing up. It's weird but it seems to work, give it a try!

Love Jim Croce ... I think I still have a cassette tape! Time in a bottle or bad bad Leroy brown are probably my favorites!!! Have not heard him in in so many years! I have my old Sony stereo from the early 1990's that has a cassette tape player along with CD and radio I should pop the cassette in some day when on my elptical! I tend to watch TV rather then listen to music.

It's a very odd cat tranquilizer, but I swear it works. Not on Freeway because Freeway is a butthead, but it works on the others. Any of his songs, too--Bad Bad Leroy Brown to Photographs and Memories. Something about his voice, I guess.

I don't know if I could work out to it, but you get on with your bad self. I'm more of a "works out to Metallica and AC/DC" kinda girl, myself. Whatever it takes!