First Thanksgiving

I know there are tons of archived questions about this, but I haven't been able to find exactly what I'm looking for. I host Thanksgiving every year, and I'm starting to plan for this year. I'll be three months post-op. I'm not worried about meal (turkey and a few bites of roasted vegetables), just about dessert. We usually have dessert a couple of hours after the main meal, so being full won't be much of an excuse. I don't know if I should make something WLS friendly (like sf, high protein crustless cheesecake) or if I should just suck it up and deal since I'm not far out from surgery. In the past, deprivation like that would have led to a binge. I'm confident that won't happen now. Any advice? What worked for you?

We've been dealing with "alternate desserts" since we discovered that my wife and one daughter were extremely sensitive to gluten. For 10 years we've been making the traditional stuff, and a side dessert that is friendly for them as well. We also changed a number of recipes to allow them to eat the things they enjoyed for so many years.

Binging and overeating is a real danger, and it is possible to do so by grazing. On the other hand, completely shutting something out of your diet turns it into forbidden fruit, and then you start dwelling on it. If you were going to eat it every day, or even every few days, it would be a problem. A small piece on a holiday is not. All that, of course, depends on your will power and desire to succeed.

My first Thanksgiving with my sleeve was last year. I had gotten to the solid food stage just in time to be able to eat some turkey. I ate that, a taste of some gravy, and a tiny tiny amount of stuffing, and that was it. Over the next few days, I stuck pretty close to my diet plan with a tiny taste of traditional leftovers to go with my turkey. Once they were gone, it was back to the salt mine (so to speak). I was able to have a tiny taste of things, stick very close to my meal plan, and not feel like I was depriving myself all at the same time.

As we approach the holiday again, I am almost 20 lbs under goal, so I can say it worked for me. Results may vary, but this is how I did it.

Thanks! I've been gluten free for about 8 years. It solved a lot stomach problems for me. It was really hard those first few years, but we've gotten into a groove. It's a good thing too, because my mother, wife, and mother-in-law have all had to give up gluten this year. Besides a dessert or two, and possibly some crackers with the appetizers, the whole meal will be gluten free.

What worked for me was to just have a bite of dessert. I enjoyed it, didn't feel deprived, and it didn't turn into a binge later. (I also then got all the desserts out of my house ASAP.)

That makes a lot of sense. I wish there was dessert that I could eat. Most of it will have gluten (which I haven't eaten in 8 years) or else there's GF pumpkin pie (I abhor pumpkin). Making sure all of the leftover desserts leave the house is also great advice.

We go non-traditional for Thanksgiving dessert since we got tired of the traditional options. Gluten free chocolate cake + vanilla ice cream.

I had my surgery around the same time last year as you did this year. So I was probably in about the same place food stage-wise as you are. I was cleared to eat pretty much any food by T-day, but was finding that I still needed to stick with very moist foods. My sister had had VSG several years before, so I knew that there would be plenty of low-carb options, and my brother-in-law does a really good moist turkey. I decided in advance that I wasn't going to call attention to having had the surgery, even though all of the family knew about it. So I just put a few spoonfuls of things that were OK'd for me to eat on my plate and nibbled on them slowly while chatting with everyone. I did try a little bit of a dessert, can't remember which one, and everything seemed to be OK. Then all of a sudden about 30 minutes after the last thing I ate, I started getting severe cramping and feeling nauseated. I tried to go outside and get some cool fresh air and it didn't help. Got hubby to drive me home, and barely made it before dinner made a reappearance. I'd been lucky to that point, I'd had nausea but that was the first time I actually threw up after surgery. I still don't know what set me off, because I ate several things that day that were the first times I'd had that food since surgery. Probably the sugar from the one bite of dessert if I were guessing.

My main point is don't eat anything you haven't tried out beforehand, because a family gathering is likely NOT the place you want to find out something doesn't sit well. If you haven't been eating sugared things, don't start at T-day dinner. If you want to "fit in" fix a little of something you've been eating that seems like a dessert and take it with you. If your family is anything like mine, they probably won't notice over all the chatter catching up with lives and debating the news. LOL.

Thanks for the help. I was thinking about doing a trial run of a low carb cheesecake to make sure it came out ok, but in light of your comment it makes even more sense. I definitely don't want spend that night hugging the toilet.

I'm really trying to focus on moderation as I also react poorly to deprivation. So you can bet your sweet bippy I will be having a small piece of pumpkin pie. If it were socially acceptable, I would just have pumpkin pie right out of the pan for my Thanksgiving dinner!

Thanks! After all of these replies, I'm starting to think that I should make a gf pecan pie like I normally do, and send most of it home with my dad.