Orientation, Invisibility and Isolation in Guelph!

Hello my fabulous friends!

Today was my orientation day in Guelph.

I set up the cameras in my car and recorded the two hour trip from Oshawa to Guelph with an incredibly rambling diatribe about nearly every topic ever thought of in regards to WLS. Fortunately I'm a professional editor.... so I wasn't worried that I couldn't erase the entire thing if there were no usable moments. hahahaha!!

The presenters were excellent... but I couldn't help but feel we were all thinking the same thing. How fast can I get all the required appointments booked... so we could proceed with the surgery as fast as humanly possible. I wonder if having an online introductory video with all the information would streamline the process... and then orientation would be more of a question/support group session.

One interesting observation that perhaps people could expand upon... is the isolation of this orientation session. Everyone was quite courteous; however, there was zero interaction between people in the session. Was this the same for everyone in their orientation sessions? Was it because people were used to being invisible to other humans... so when brought together...they were invisible to each other? It was quite disconcerting. That being said... I was part of this isolated group of life travellers... so it is not a judgement about "THEM"... as I AM THEM.

Guy 57

I have been to two classes. I have felt the same. At my second class a woman starred at me almost the entire hour. It made me feel uneasy. I felt sort of alone in the group. Thankfully my mom is going with me dues to some social anxiety issues I have. If not then i'd really feel odd.

Honestly, I felt embarrassed. Not from any interactions I had but because of mental games I played on my own. Feeling guilt for needing this tool. Even though I know everyone in the room was in the same boat. It is something that is slowly fading. The insecurity has lessened. I think you hit the nail on the head to say that there is a sense of invisibility. We get so used to in every day life that it's hard to shake.

Hey Melsbells! ;-) Great name!

You have a great mom for sure! We ALL have social anxiety issues... people just don't admit it!

One of the most interesting things I've discovered is that the majority of people do feel embarrassment, guilt and/or shame for needing WLS. It is one of the surprising revelations for me. Your description of everyone in the room being in the same boat is a strong visual for me. At my orientation, we were all in that same boat... pretending that we were alone... by not looking left or right... just straight ahead! Perhaps it was a mental survival mechanism.... but interesting none-the-less!

I hope you share more of your journey!!!

Thanks again,

Guy 57

I suspect the quietness is out of anxiety. Going to an orientation is a big step towards making WLS a reality, and there can be a lot of feelings around that. Guilt, shame, uncertainty, embarrassment.

Sparklekitty (Julie),Science-Loving Hag.... what a fabulous handle!

I must be shameless... guiltless... and obviously clueless. Your sentiment is held by the majority of people on the WLS journey! I felt anxiety for sure.... because I wanted to make sure I was doing everything to expedite my surgery. Perhaps it's because I'm 57... and have calloused over whatever shame and guilt I once had. Is that a good thing... probably not.

Thanks for sharing my friend with the fabulous handle! ;-)

Guy 57

P.S. MY Sparkle Kitties! ;-)

What lovely kitties! 10/10, would pet softly!

I agree with SparkleKitty. I think anxiety is probably #1, not knowing anyone is #2, and many not being comfortable interacting in a somewhat public forum is #3. Group support meetings often start just as quiet, which is why the leader often asks the group participants to take turns tell their stories to open up discussion.

Hey Liz WantsHealthForAll! ;-) One of the most positive names I've seen!

I can't disagree with any of your conclusions! Let's see if the next part of my journey is similar to yours!

Thanks again for sharing!

Guy 57

p.s. CONGRATULATIONS ON REACHING YOUR WEIGHT LOSS GOAL!!!! GREAT JOB!!! ;-)