NOT an overeater or compulsive eater or binge eater or in denial

I am curious to know if there is anyone here who ate a modified, very low calorie diet for an extended period of time but was unable to lose weight and had a trusted physician recommend weight loss surgery.

I had weight issues from a young age, and at age 16 tipped the scales at 275 pounds. I was determined to change that, and over the next 5 years--through changing my relationship with food, cutting out soda and junk food, and being more active--I lost 115 pounds. At 21 my weight fluctuated between 155 and 160. I am 5'10", so that was actually a good weight for me. I maintained it for many months and was happy and healthy. Then I met my son's father, got pregnant, regained all the weight I had lost over the next 9 months of that pregnancy--EVEN THOUGH I was a vegetarian, didn't eat junk food, didn't drink sugary drinks, and walked to and from 2 jobs and stood on my feet at those jobs (restaurant manager/worker). I was a little upset over the course of the pregnancy about the rising numbers on the scales, but really believed I had conquered that food demon and that after my baby was born I could repeat what I'd done before and return to the 160 range. I didn't. I only got down to about 230 and my weight wouldn't budge from there. I exercised, joined gyms, and was determined but it didn't happen. About 12 years after my son was born, still weighing about 230, I got pregnant with my daughter. History repeated itself...I gained about 120 with my pregnancy and could not lose it afterward.

My daughter is now 18. My son is 30 and I just turned 53 in April. I have spent the prime years of my life overweight, even though I have a healthy relationship with food, rarely eat sweets, rarely eat fried food, don't eat McDonald's and the like EVER, and don't drink soda (definitely not regular and very rarely the diet kind). Since 1986 (when my son was born) I have been very stubborn about my consumption of anything--food and drinks alike--that is not beneficial to my body, and I refuse to eat if I am not hungry. It is very VERY common for me to eat something small mid-morning, such as a cup of yogurt or a piece of fruit or peanut butter on grainy bread, and then eat a balanced healthy meal for dinner, such as salmon, rice and asparagus, and that's it. My average daily caloric intake FOR THE LAST 30 YEARS has been 1200 or less. Over the last 30 years I have seen Dr. after Dr. after Dr.--probably at least a dozen.

At one point, desperately, I saw a holistic "Dr." because conventional Western medicine didn't seem to have any answers for me. Looking back, I don't know if he was honest or a "predator" because he seemed to believe my story and said my weight wasn't my fault and he could help me but I'd have to pay for the course of treatment upfront--and that payment did not include the cost of supplements. He ordered labwork and told me I had Hashimoto's Disease and that he could help me. I was happy for a couple of months, until I realized every time I returned to the office he prescribed another "protocol" (supplement) I needed to take. I stopped seeing him because the supplements reached about $200 per month and it is not covered by insurance. I couldn't afford it. So the $4500 I paid upfront, I am still paying off on a CareCredit card.

Of all the Drs. I have seen only one seemed to believe my story. He was genuinely concerned that I have other symptoms, although thankfully no diabetes or other diseases associated with obesity. My feet and ankles frequently swell, my knees recently developed Chondromalacia Patella, I have chronic fatigue--no energy, chronic constipation--even though easily half of what I eat is whole fruits/vegetables, the outer edge of my eyebrows thinned out to almost nothing, about 10 years ago developed xanthelasmata above both eyes, and my menstrual cycle is vicious (too heavy to describe). I do not have high cholesterol, high blood pressure, diabetes, heart disease, thyroid disease, etc. I am simply obese and unable to lose the weight. This Dr., an Endocrinologist, explained to me about hormones produced in our guts that regulate metabolism. He said there are hormones that are supposed to trigger burning stored fat for energy, and also storing of fat for future energy needs (which occurs even in people of a healthy weight). He said that in some people the body doesn't get the signal to use stored fat for energy (which explains my fatigue and lack of energy) and also doesn't recognize that there even ARE fat stores to use for energy so it makes more (which helps explain why I cannot lose weight). This Dr. recommended the Gastric Sleeve, and said that removing that part of the stomach that is removed in this surgery would help to regulate those hormones so I can lose weight. I've never wanted to entertain WLS as a solution because I don't overeat, but I trust this Dr. and am now considering it so I can live out the rest of my life in a healthier body.

He also said there is a very big genetic factor in obesity. I have 2 sisters who have never battled weight, and two who have had weight loss surgery. I also have cousins--one on Dad's side and one on Mom's side--who have had weight loss surgery. I also have a cousin *****ached almost 600 pounds. It is her plight, bless her, that made me so stubborn about my caloric intake. I refuse to eat in excess, and I usually refuse even a small glass of wine or a good cold beer because I don't want the unnecessary calories.

Wow, I really put it all out there, didn't I? So, back to my topic of discussion...I want to know if there are others out there who know for a fact they don't have an unhealthy relationship with food yet they are unable to lose weight and are considering WLS as a solution.

It sounds like you have had a tough time. I have heard that WLS causes your body to find a new set point for your metabalism. I don't know if it for RNY only or includes the sleeve. I have heard that ghrelin is produced in more than one place in your body. I have often wondered what makes WLS so effective. I have lost 50-60 pounds a couple of times before WLS and regained the weight. After RNY, I gained about 5 pounds after about 15 months, then lost 10 pounds. I don't know how it works, but I would be willing to try if I was in your position. I'm sure you have had your thyroid checked, right? I think I would go with the RNY to get the malabsortion since you already eat healthy and small amounts. I wish you well. Another thought is that maybe you are hyper sensitive to carbs, have you tried Atkins?

I wasn't a binge eater and ate mostly healthy food (still do..), but then, I averaged around 3000 kcal a day. So I can sort of relate, at least to that piece of it. If you're still obese and only eating 1200 kcal a day, then yes - you must have some major medical issues.

I am always one to doubt it when someone says they don't overeat and only eats about 1200 calories a day and is morbidly obese. If it takes 3500 calories for a pound of fat I don't see how a person that doesn't take in extra calories can gain weight. I am not an expert or even pretend to be but I would first want to rule out denial.

Just because you don't eat junk does not mean you aren't getting in a lot of calories. A jar of peanut butter is not that much but it has nearly 5000 calories, more than enough to gain one pound. I could easily eat that in one day and still not overeat or even eat junk food.

I will take you at your word that you only eat 1200 calories a day. I assume that you weigh and measure every bite that goes in your mouth. If not I would start doing that. Eyeballing and guessing is not very accurate. I remember thinking I was having a serving of cereal until I actually poured out what I considered a serving and realized it was 2 cups, not the half cup a serving I thought it was.

Part of me wants to say that if you aren't overeating or eating too many calories than limiting the amount of food you are eating won't change a thing. I would assume that if you are being honest with yourself than you already are eating exactly what you would if you had WLS.

Exactly what would be different if your capacity for food was limited if you already eat a limited amount of food.

I guess saying that removing part of your stomach would create hormonal changes that would cause you to use the food you do eat differently is one theory. I can't say I have heard much about that other than the removal of the part of the stomach that controls hunger but again, if you are eating exactly the same way as you would if you had WLS than hunger doesn't seem to be an issue.

My only suggestion would be perhaps seeing a counselor just to rule out hidden eating disorders that you aren't even aware of or being in severe denial about what and how much you are eating.

The only person you need to be honest with is yourself. I honestly don't care what or how much you eat. If you say you only eat 1200 calories a day I have no way of knowing whether or not you do nor do I really care. I just know that in order for WLS to be effective you need to confront and deal with any eating issues you have. If you don't have any eating issues that having WLS would be like having a heart transplant when you already have a good heart.

Weight loss surgery is not magic. It does not cure rare disorders that cause a normal eater to be morbidly obese. It is designed to work with a person who has disordered eating to help them stick with a healthy way of eating. If you already have a healthy way of eating than it seems like a waste of time.

If you have seen doctor after doctor and this is the only doctor who has suggested weight loss surgery than that says something. No other doctor seemed to think that WLS would be beneficial.

But hey, if your insurance will pay for it and you are willing to have your body altered in the off chance that it will fix you then go for it.

That's the problem... Drs have that 3500 calorie formula engrained in their heads and therefore conclude before I even open my mouth to tell them my story that I must have an eating disorder.

Today I ate a banana, had black coffee, unsweetened iced tea, lemon water and for dinner had green salad with vinaigrette, and a single serving of angel hair pasta with pesto and grilled chicken breast. That's it...and that's typical. I'm being honest with you, and the Drs, and most importantly with myself. I appreciate your feedback, and your honesty. Drs didn't find my problem because they weren't looking for it. An assumption is made about people *****ach a point of being double their ideal weight that, for some of us, isn't true. I don't overeat. People who know me know this. The only times I gained weight over the last 37 years was during pregnancy. I lost 115 lbs between 1980 and 1985, gained over 100 with each of 2 pregnancies, 12 years apart, and maintained a steady weight between them. I don't know, I'm not a Dr, but it seems apparent to me that the pregnancies played a role.

I'm not looking for a silver bullet or magic pill to make me magically get back to where I was before. I do have my eating under control, so my hope is that there's something to what the Endocrinologist told me and something will be triggered in my gut hormones to help my body know what to do...when to make fat stores, when to use them for energy...

I'm weary of carrying all this weight. I see photos of friends who start eating healthy and exercising and lose weight and just keep thinking, "Where's MY reward?"

Many of the vets will tell you, you are eating too many calories for you. so you eat 1200 calories a day and you don't lose weight? Eat 800 calories a day. or even 1000. The less calories you eat, the more likely you are to lose weight. That's the thing that stinks about it.

WLS for me has changed my life because 800 calories feels like 1200.

hope that helps.

Quiet frankly- it sounds like denial imho. Being vegetarian and not overeating doesn't mean that you aren't taking in excess calories. Reality is you are overweight. Of course genetics and health conditions play a role- but not a role as as big as your dietary intake plays. I saw no mention of alcohol in your post- I assume you don't drink? From what you listed in the reply to Ladytaz (who's response was 100%on point!), your diet screamed carb focused to me.

Im not sure what the 30 year weight history has to do with today. Your efforts 30 years worked for that time in your life. After my second son was born I did weigh****chers and successfully, but gained the weight back over time. I tried hard to replicate that success. I finally realized my body changed and my approach needed to as well. So I kind of think your endocrinologist was on to something with his thinking/explanation. WLS is a metabolic surgery, it affects more than just a 'smaller stomach', in my case of rny, the malabsorption made for a different body chemistry (my unscientific term). You follow a plan and lose the weight quickly to learn how to maintain.

My worry for you is that your walking into the WLS arena thinking you have nothing to learn cause you don't overeat, binge eat etc. You've laid out your 30 years of understanding (which hasn't worked for you). What you really need to focus on is unlearning what you think you know- and adapting to a post WLS lifestyle if that is what you're truly considering.

I appreciate your response. My focus on stressing that I don't overeat is not to say I have nothing to learn. Clearly I do. I merely am pointing out that I don't have a big food addiction problem. I feel fortunate for that and believe it will make things easier for me if I move forward with WLS.

To answer your question about drinking, no, I don't. As I mentioned before, I don't tend to consume calories that aren't beneficial for fear of gaining weight.

"I don't have a big food addiction problem" to me is like saying I have a minor heroin addiction. It is or it isn't-- there really is no gray area.

Great that you don't drink- I don't either. I see many struggle with that.

Best of luck to you.

I hope you get straightened out. It's clear you have been agonizing over this. And for the record, I know a diehard vegetarian that weighs almost 400 pounds. Everyone I know on OH that tried to go vegetarian or vegan in the past ended up GAINING weight. It's sold as being healthier, but really isn't.

The best thing you can do is weigh and log every morsel you eat. Every last bite. It must be weighed, not estimated. Dp it for at least 3 months. I've been using Myfitnesspal for the last 1800 days (almost), and it's helped enormously.

Check out the article below. The answer you need is there:

http://www.acaloriecounter.com/blog/why-am-i-not-losing-weig ht