Some friendly advice from someone who is (almost) 2 years out.

Not everyone has enormous amounts of loose skin, and not everyone feels gross because of it. Plastics are not required for happiness.

I do not appreciate someone trying to invalidate my experience and feelings. My loose skin hangs below my vagina and I am still 90% happy and I look amazing. (As I actually stated in my post) If someone says "i", it means them, not you. Don't take it personally.

I did not, however, suggest anyone get plastics or that they would need it, so don't try to shame me because I decided that plastics are the path I wanted to take. That is my choice.

Anyone going through the surgery should mentally prepare themselves. That is sound advice. They may be super happy with their skin, they may have very little, or they may have a lot. Either way, they should always be prepared. I am surprised anyone would disagree that someone should prepare themselves before surgery.

>> Skin. You may feel just as bad about yourself post rny.

My issue is with your assertion that OTHERS may feel bad. Not with your personal experience as it applies to your journey.

Don't take it personally.

And they may feel bad. People should be prepared. No one prepared me for the emotional side of excess skin. I know many others that say the same.

I am strongly in support of anyone who feels they need plastic surgery in order to feel good after losing a large amount of weight -- indeed, I know several people who were emotionally distressed by their skin, and I contend that is a very real and legitimate reason to pursue having that option available.

That said, having lost over 200 pounds, I have been amazed at how good my skin actually has turned out to be. I was prepared for something far worse, and indeed, I've probably just been incredibly lucky as with such a massive loss, I certainly wasn't wrong to expect it to be as you described.

However, I also took your original post the same way that Julie did -- and sort of cringed when you said that

"you may feel just as bad about yourself post rny. Lots of skin, lots and lots of skin. I am talking, I could cloth a whole other human with my excess skin."

-- because it gives the impression that your experience is likely everyone's. It isn't. It isn't mine and it hasn't been Julie's.

I am not sure why you felt that she was "invalidating your feelings," -- but I suspect that has more to do with your own feelings than with her intent. There was no shaming in her response. There is no reason to feel shame about excess skin!

I took it, and from her subsequent response that she intended it to clarify to someone considering surgery that your personal experience and feelings about excess skin aren't everyone's experience.

I would contend, and from your last post, I believe you agree, that everyone's experience is vastly different post-op. Clarifying that is part of preparing themselves before surgery.

It was more her indication that i needed plastic surgery to be happy.

I understand where you are coming from. It's great that your skin rebounded the way it did, mine didn't. Many others have the same issue. Again, no one prepared any of us so this is my advice. It's better to be prepared. this is in no way trying to detour people from surgery. I am a huge advocate.

"no one prepared any of us..." excuse me but I was well prepared for the possibility of excess skin. I'm sure many others were prepared also.

I really didn't come here to be attacked. I have been talking about my personal contacts in many of theses posts.

If you have nothing nice to say, don't say it.