Has your surgeon yelled at you

Hey there,

I'm sorry to hear you're going through that with your surgeon. I understand first hand how stressful and undermining it is to be in that position.

It absolutely is not normal or ok.

I had a specialist recently yell at me in an appointment. He was awful. I didn't say anything in the appointment, but as soon as I was in my car, I was in tears. I headed right to my doctor and asked him to set me up with a new specialist. There was no way I was going back to that guy. I was in tears with my doc too. Thankfully, my PCP is so empathetic and always has my back. He got me a new respirologist right away.

And my personality is not one to let people treat me that way, btw - regardless of position, including doctor, CEO, etc But it was so unexpected and I was sick and tired. I didn't know how to respond, and frankly it would have gone over his head.

Here's what I would recommend for you. If you are able to change surgeons for your follow up, do so immediately. Your care is #1 and avoiding your appointments is not ok.

If your aren't able to change doctors, can you bring someone with you to your appointments who can speak up for you when he speaks out of turn next time? Having someone there to support you may be exactly what you need.

Stay strong. It's not a reflection of you at all!!

Jeez, that's terrible. You're not being overly sensitive in the least. I'm sorry that happened to you!

Fire him. That is completely unacceptable behavior. Luckily, you have the RNY; any bariatric surgeon can follow you. Get your records and get a new doc. I would also report him to the hospital.

I addition to some of the great advice you've already gotten - if you do need to see him next time, take a friend who can be your advocate with you.

And don't forget you have every right to review him on Google, HealthGrades & any other social media outlet available with his name on it!

I'm sorry to hear that happened to you.

For your next appointment is there someone who could go with you? My brother is more shy and quiet than me so I often go with him to his appointments or make calls for him when he is worried about being bullied into something. I don't stand for that treatment of my family, and I think that protectiveness projects during our meetings.

Meg~

I do not think you're being overly sensitive.

I am so sorry you've had this experience. I hope you will take some of the good advice you've been given above.

thank you all for taking the time to answer me because i was really feeling stupid about this. i have decided to see if i can't get an appointment with another doctor at the center because i really don't like being yelled at. it really made me not want to go again.

Who is your surgeon?

Mine didn't, but he did do something "sudden" that caught me off guard once ... At a pre-op exam of me in his office he noticed I had some small open wounds on my legs, which he told me likely were caused by my not refraining from scratching there .. As we got out into his waiting room area afterwards he was talking to me ... while he was still talking he surreptitiously reached into one of his pants pockets and, grabbing a pair of small fingernail clippers he had in there he pulled them out while simultaneously seizing my left wrist (I'm left-handed) with his other hand and yanked it upward - as though he was going to execute a judo throw on me or something - and quickly snipped my fingernails on the four fingers of that hand, before I could even say something. I guess he figured THAT would keep me from scratching my legs .. I just wish he had asked me before he did that ..

If my doc did that to me, he wouldn't still have his hand. WOW!