I feel like giving up

Can you change your job so you can get better insurance? Have you looked at the health connector insurance plans? Maybe you could switch to one of them during open enrollment. Any way you could get a side job and save up for surgery in Mexico?

Yes, I'm working on trying to get another job. It's been tough, but I'm still searching and applying.

Surgery isnt the fix though. Its only a tool. You have to make the changes whether you get surgery or not. But the best way I lost weight was by going into ketosis. The first few days suck... But after that, I felt and feel amazing. Loads of energy bc your body is using your fat for fuel. Not carbs. Research ketosis and youll find its the best for preventing and treating diabetes as well. Can't go wrong there! Btw you can eat more on this diet, as long as it isnt carbs or sugar... I would snack on jerky or leftover chicken when I was hungry and still lost weight. Good luck! Btw. Im in medicaid bc I cant afford ins on my own. Could you apply for that?

I did apply for Medicaid, but didn't qualify.

Do your medical issues qualify for Social Security Disability? I had problems similar to yours and got to the point where I could no longer work, even though I had a desk job. I had Neuropathy, back issues, depression and anxiety, and my weight was 380. My employer's insurance did not cover WLS. I applied for Social Security and was approved on the first try... no need to appeal. Once I was approved, I had Medicare, and had surgery under that coverage.

I'm not sure... I will apply and find out! Thank you!!

I joined the RNY menu thread before I even had surgery and was eating the way that they all did. Protein forward and low carbs. When I started my journey I weighed 369.8 pounds. I had to jump thru hoops to get my surgery approved by my insurance company and during that 6 months I was able to lose 84.8 pounds on my own. I quit drinking any kind of sodas and started drinking water, both plain and flavored at least 64 ounces a day. I entered everything that I ate into MFP so I could see how I was doing everyday. The menu thread helped me immensely, it allowed me to see a variety of different options of good food.

Join the menu thread and post everyday. It is a really great group of people who are really there for you. They are not afraid to point out if they think you are doing something incorrectly - they truly do care about your success.

Good luck,

Tammy

I know how you feel. I remember feeling the same way, hopeless about the future. My insurance did not cover WLS and I had no hope that anything could change.

I had lost weight on my own many times but I could never keep it off and it was getting to the point where I couldn't even lose a little weight.

I was in my 40s before I had WLS. I also went on Social Security and got Medicare and as soon as possible I had the surgery.

I did not know even a year before that this would happen. What I am trying to say is that we don't know what the future holds. At your age it was still over 10 years before I would have surgery.

There is always hope. For me having WLS gave me hope for the first time that I could lose the weight and keep it off. It was and is hard work but it isn't impossible now.

I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers and I pray that you find something to give you that hope, too.

I'm so sorry you are in such a dark place. I have so many journal entries that are similar to what you wrote. I agree with the previous responses, most of us have been in this place. Things will not be this way forever, this is only a snapshot, your life is a filmstrip---this is not your whole story. I know it's overwhelming, but therapy can help. You can also start asking yourself how to get from here to where you want to be. If you know WLS is your best option, what do you need to do to get there? What needs to happen to make that a reality? Try breaking it down to manageable parts to stop feeling overwhelmed. I was self pay as well, and it was crazy overwhelming at first, partly because I was so desperate for it to happen immediately. You came to a good place, the posters here have a wide array of information on all aspects of this. You're not alone.

You have been given some great advice; I have none to offer.

However, I do want to give some hope. I was 38 when I had surgery and 42 went I had my first child. Every single thing you wrote resonated with me, as I felt the same. Life can change.