What was your "light bulb moment"?

My paternal grandfather lost a leg, to Diabetes, before his death. My maternal grandmother lost 3 toes...one at a time...them both her feet..to Disbetes...

I was 44...On sliding scale Insulin 4 times a day...the amounts were getting higher and higher...my boys were 10 and 12...

Something had to give...

I took a huge pay cut, to get a job, that had the insurance I needed, to get the surgery I knew I had to have. I wound up keeping that true blessing of a job, for many years

OMG, I too was on insulin 4x a day  -- and I thought, "If I am this bad NOW -- where do I have to go from here??"

I was known to bolus extra to eat something terrible, too... (that's another story of shame...)

It wasn't looking good.

I so relate!

Thank you for sharing,  Kat. 

I had a definite light bulb moment.  In April of 2014, i flew with my family to Seattle to visit my younger brother.  I was at my highest weight,  my youngest was just 4 months old.  The flight itself was only manageable because i wedged myself in with my hubby and oldest son without worry of overhanging into their seats.

My real moment came while we were in the hotel pool. I rarely swam because i couldn't shave my legs myself and wouldn't wear a bathing suit in public. So,  i spent a lot of time in the pool, floating.  Fat floats, really well. So being in the pool felt good. What felt horrible was walking up the steps to get out of the pool and feeling all of that weight settle back onto my frame.  It was a huge shock. I never realized how hard it was on my body.  I was at least 280 pounds on a small 5'3" frame. I had been thinking about surgery,  bit it was honestly that very moment that i decoded i was going to habe to do something or i wouldn't live to see the baby grow up.  I was type 2 diabetic and having serious issues with unexplained acute urticaria.  

Both have resolved themselves.  I feel like WLS had saved my life.  

As you know, my mom lives in Oregon -- so I have shared the same experience flying.  I was okay if I am going with my husband and son -- because I could use some of their seat for "overflow" -- and I kept the seat belt extension from one flight so that I didn't have to ever ask for one afterwards.

I could never use the tray table.  I would often hold my urine the entire time because trying to fit through the aisle was miserable and embarrassing.  

I missed my grandmother's funeral because I was too ashamed to fly alone (we couldn't afford all three of us at the time) and was afraid they'd make me pay for two seats.  

WLS saved both our lives!

I can so relate to the pool thing. I loved swimming aka floating in the water, reality came crashing down on me once I had to get out of the water & all that weight to lug around on my joints.

I've had one major events and than many many little moments.

My school offers this immersion experience where you live the life of a refugee on the run for a weekend. It's incredibly hard. There's lots and lots of running through woods, snow, field, etc. There's shoveling and hard physical work, there's no food for 2 whole days. There's people shooting guns so you have to lie down and hide in the middle of wet snow. It's awful (though nothing compared to those actually fleeing their home). The entire time I was wheezing, I felt like I was putting my team in "danger" and holding them back. I was in tears because I couldn't run for more than a minute without being in pain. I was never more aware of my weight and my weakness as during that weekend.  That's when I decided I couldn't live like this anymore, not physically, emotionally, or mentally.

That's an amazing exercise in empathy.  As a person who works with refugees, I fear the people who need this training the most would never do it.  

I was 39, 326 pounds, and luckily still healthy but so tired all the time. My husband and I were discussing our plans to adopt and he was concerned about how my future health might affect this hypothetical child. I told him then that I had been really contemplating WLS. He cried so hard, I've never seen him that emotional. He said he was so relieved that we will be able to grow old together. I'll never forget that look on his face. It was a great reminder that I am important and worthy of taking excellent care of myself.

"He said he was relieved that we would be able to grow old together."

That's a keeper you've got there.

Thank you to all of you for sharing your incredible, heartbreaking and courageous stories!

My lightbulb moment came during Christmas 2014.  I went to stay with my brother in Denver, on Christmas eve he asked me to run to the grocery store for something he forgot for dinner that night.  My niece had just gotten her drivers permit, so she went with me so she could drive.  We got to the store and my niece begged me to wait in the car.  I was a little confused by this but insisted on going in with her.  She wouldn't walk with me or even speak to me in the store.  That's when the lightbulb went off.  I realized then and there that my own niece was embarrassed to be seen with me.  My heart broke and I let it ruin my whole trip.  When I got back home, the next day I made the appt. to see the surgeon.  I know we shouldn't let other people dictate how we feel, but my feelings that moment pushed me to do something I should have done 10 years ago.

Her high school graduation is this June and I haven't seen her or my other two nieces since that Christmas.  My goal is to be down 100 pounds by then.