If you are having a hard time forgiving.....

Kathy S.
on 2/23/17 2:29 pm - InTheBurbs, XX
RNY on 08/29/04 with

To keep from turning to food sometimes we have to forgive....having a hard time?

HW:330 - GW:150 - MW:118-125

RW:190 - CW:130

H.A.L.A B.
on 2/23/17 2:42 pm

Being angry an doing something about situation is one thing.

Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." ... someone once said, is like drinking poison and hoping it will kill the other party.... Resentment is like taking poison and waiting for the other person to die.

There is nothing worse than justifiable anger because there is no reason to let it go....  

I had to learn to let it go...  I get angry - but I try it not to hold to it...

Sometimes I come home frustrated and angry..  and went to my BF... He listens patiently to my went .. then hugs me and asks me "so, what are you going to do about it? "  

And there is the serenity prayer....applies to AA but also to anyone else... if I can't change things- I need to learn how to live with the situation - people... 

I do like the 4 agreements... 

"The Four Agreements
1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don't take anything personally.
3. Don't make assumptions.
4. Always do your best. "
? Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements: A Practical Guide to Personal Freedom

 

 

Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG

"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"

"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."

Grim_Traveller
on 2/23/17 3:06 pm
RNY on 08/21/12

Yup.

6'3" tall, male.

Highest weight was 475. RNY on 08/21/12. Current weight: 198.

M1 -24; M2 -21; M3 -19; M4 -21; M5 -13; M6 -21; M7 -10; M8 -16; M9 -10; M10 -8; M11 -6; M12 -5.

odie
on 2/23/17 3:09 pm
RNY on 05/26/14

I actually forgive way too easy and so never learn my lesson!  When I was young, my mom always told me that my heart was way too soft and that I would cry a lot!!  She was right!!

To Thine Own Self Be True!!

H.A.L.A B.
on 2/23/17 3:14 pm

forgive and let go it does not mean to forget... 

fool me once - shame on you .. fool me twice - shame on me...

Hala. RNY 5/14/2008; Happy At Goal =HAG

"I can eat or do anything I want to - as long as I am willing to deal with the consequences"

"Failure is not falling down, It is not getting up once you fell... So pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and start all over again...."

Gina 22 years out
on 2/23/17 5:29 pm - Burleson, TX

I just spit Greek yogurt, all over my iPad...

RNY 4-22-02...

LW: 6lb,10 oz SW:340lb GW:170lb CW:155

We Can Do Hard Things

Kathy S.
on 2/24/17 7:14 am - InTheBurbs, XX
RNY on 08/29/04 with

Good protein Gina!

HW:330 - GW:150 - MW:118-125

RW:190 - CW:130

Deanna798
on 2/24/17 7:30 am
RNY on 08/04/15

Holding a grudge and holding on to anger is allowing that person who hurt you to continue to hurt you.

Forgiving is not forgetting, or even reconciling or condoning.  It is letting go of the anger and hurt and moving on.  

 

Age: 44 | Height: 5' 3" | Starting January 2015: 291 | RNY 8/4/15 with Dr. Arthur Carlin| Goal: 150

Listen to advice and accept discipline, and at the end you will be counted among the wise. ~Proverbs 19:20

(deactivated member)
on 2/25/17 12:19 pm

I have a very hard time with true forgiveness because I can't seem to forgive my bad choices never mind what they did. 

I swallowed a lot of excess food trying to forget my emotional pain. 

4MRB4PHOTO
on 2/26/17 5:11 am
VSG on 07/28/14

I am trying to learn not to hold onto negative things that people have said or done to me.

I always forgave people, but sometimes they don't deserve forgiveness or should be called on what they said or did so that they know their remarks/behavior was out of line or hurtful.

I also am beginning to understand that some people are just "scorpions" (from the "Scorpion And The Frog" story); you can't change who they are, so it is better to distance yourself from them.

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