I'm so proud of myself !

I read some old posts a year or more ago... I was very confused ... admitting being abused verbally financially and even occasionally physically .  My " new" much smaller body wasn't proving to be " enough " ... big surprise because abusers never find ANY amount of perfection enough.

My problem was .. why did I accept this insane " logic" ?  Why would I take their phone calls verbal abuse and presence on my property ? 

The GOOD news is its OVER. I stopped thinking that these crazy abusive men would gift me anything for free.. much less the unconditional true love I've always needed and desired wholeheartedly .  I realized they were blatantly and cynically using me .( and any other emotionally vulnerable woman they could ) .. and while I was mourning those lost relationships I also realized I had opened a door for a relationship far more sincere appropriate and actually loving and caring towards me . 

So I can say .. a nice butt six pac abs , firm arms and nice breasts do NOT guarantee even remotely a sincere relationship .  To be honest I'm still very afraid to date despite twice weekly therapy .  

It's good to see you are getting therapy. Maybe you can change your way of thinking, as you are far too caught up on men (relationships are good but only the right kind) and your physical appearance. A GOOD man won't really care about that, it will just be a bonus. Jumping into anything will cause you to risk a chance of some sort of abuse because you don't know the guy, he could be in it for your money. I wish you luck and hope you can gain some insight somewhere in your therapy to see where many of us are coming from when we reply to your post. Men aren't everything. I wish I had realized that before jumping into relationships being desperate for love...

Posts* not when we reply to just this post but all your posts. 

BTW, I'm proud of you for nipping it in the bud.

Learning to love ourselves and not be abused is something that can take some time. Not just in romantic relationships. With just regular friends it can be hard to. 

I am glad you are seeing you are worth it. 

 It is okay not to date. It is okay to spend time alone. I know I can be in a room of people and be lonely. Also by myself and just be alone. 

I'm so proud of you working on yourself from the inside-out!  Many of us, being obese, we feel unworthy of anything better than what gave us attention, be it good or otherwise.  We allow behavior toward us that would be unacceptable to someone else because we just want to be accepted.  Many marriages and relationships end after wls for this very reason.  The patient realizes that they are worthy of more and/or the partner realizes it too and gets scared.

Whenever that next relationship comes (and don't ru****), you're going to be so much stronger at loving and being loved, because you love yourself and want only the best this round.

Way to go Meow. The first step to learn to love yourself before you can expect anyone to love or respect you. This is something that I often wrestle with myself. Women as so loving and giving by nature that we often neglect ourselves trying to make sure everyone is ok. I am so happy to see your progress and I wish you well. Take care.