Overly full

I'm pre op and Recently I've seen a lot of posts on feeling full (or not). As I was reading about people not feeling full post op I got a little... Anxious? It was very strange. I asked myself why was the idea of not being able to experience fullness stress inducing for me. It hit me. I don't just like food. I like feeling that extreme overwhelming "Oh my gosh I can't walk I'm so stuffed" fullness. I like that overindulgence. Which is obvious, as I am just under 300lbs. It's strange, I'm not nervous about the loss of certain foods post op, but the loss of certain feelings.

Its weird because overwhelming full is hardly comfortable. So why do I crave that feeling so much?

I'm glad to be in the process of putting to death this way of thinking, but it makes me wonder: was the loss of over abundance (not particular food) difficult for anyone? How did you cope and grow?

Oh how I missed that extreme "can't move" belchey fullness I used to get. I hated the new full feeling after surgery for a couple of months but now I don't even care. I don't miss the roll me out the door full either. But it did mess with my head for a little bit. When you physically feel better when the weight starts coming off you don't chase that feeling anymore. I think it's cool that I can eat dinner, feel full but immediately go walk 5 miles! My husband always says just wait, I'm too full lol.  

This is one of the many head issues we have to learn to deal with and BEAT!  

Make a list of any and all potential road blocks and start a plan on how to identify them and how to over come them. For example I found I ate so much when I was cooking, I started chewing gum while cooking and that prevented me from eating so much.  I found in front of a TV I would eat mindlessly. So I avoided TV or I kept my hands busy with knitting or coloring so I would not eat.

Keep us posted on how you are doing!

It's a great question. I have no idea why we do horrible things to ourselves. But it's definitely worth trying to figure out.

I cope by asking myself questions like this, every day. It's not the issue, or even the question, that causes us the most trouble. It's putting our head in the sand and ignoring it that kills us.

Head hunger and fullness is going to be one of the biggest issues you face, and I can't emphasize enough how important it is to work on that pre-surgery. Ask yourself and really thing about why you want to feel overwhelmingly full. What emotions does that satisfy? Were you deprived of food -- or love, or toys, or attention, or anything in particular -- when you were a child? Did food satisfy that need? Was food the one thing you were allowed to overindulge in? And when you can't overindulge, how will you feel? What can replace that feeling, that need? 

This is incredibly hard, and I am NOT minimizing your concerns at all ... nor do I want to scare you off from surgery. But I totally want you to really work on your thoughts around food because it's so critical. (I have an excellent therapist and have been dealing with an eating disorder for eight years; it's helped immensely, but I'm not out of the woods yet.)

I had surgery nearly two months ago and am (of course) also working through my own thoughts about food, hunger, indulgence, etc. 

By asking the questions you've already asked, you're on the right path -- acknowledging that food and eating are much bigger than just "I eat a lot." Good luck!!!

In my case overwhelmingly full was my replacement for other harmful behavior.  Whether it's eating, or cutting, it accomplishes the same purpose which is to avoid and distract from pain or emotions.  I hated my feelings for a long time.  The problem is that eating to fullness chronically changes how we feel full.  It was very hard for me to lose my feeling, and I am continually vigilant post-op to avoid it.  I lost my replacement for dealing with emotions when I stopped eating.  I did not realize that for some time.

No one can say why you do this but, well, you. :)  I found this in counseling.  I pursued things until I found something I was passionate about, and then devoted my life to perfecting it (counseling).  This is my new addiction.  Of course, now I am a workaholic, lol.  We are working on that in therapy now!

In my case, growth is gradual.  It has taken a decade to get me here, even though I had surgery in June 2015.  

It will be different. You'll get use to it. It does take a bit for some people though. It took me months to get the hang of it. I had to force myself to throw up several times because you can overeat very easily- LIterally 1 extra bit could do it.

I wouldn't be anxious. Losing weight......fitting in new clothes......being able to sit in normal theater seats...going out to eat and not "worrying" if you are going to be full at the end.

If it's causing you a lot of anxiety....it is something to bring counseling.

Scott