Ugh, not a good day

I had a super stressful day at work. I've been at my job for about 5-6 weeks and I'm doing Payroll now which is something I've never done before. We have expatriates we pay monthly plus we have an executive payroll we pay monthly plus our regular weekly payroll. Plus we have our taxable fringe benefits to process on top of all that - long story short OMG I was so ridiculously overwhelmed today. This is not a side of my brain I use ever and the one part of my job I'm not super confident I can handle.

Well, I didn't handle it well. We normally are done on Monday with Payroll and we're still not done with it (although I think we're close). I was really on the verge of a mini breakdown because the person training me was not being patient at all with me even though this is literally the first time I'm doing this.

Enter the damn cookies. Our building owner brought in cookies. I haven't indulged ALL YEAR in any goodies anyone brought in to my last job OR the amazing looking Japanese goodies that people bring in at my new job. Apparently I hit the wall today. I took a molasses cookie on my lunch break and ate it. It was freaking delicious.

Half an hour later I felt HORRIBLE.

Definitely no dumping. But did not feel good at all. 

And emotionally I feel like **** for eating my feelings. Argh.

Not a good day.

Oh and the cookie was like the size of my head.

Hopefully you are feeling better now! Stress is a real killer.  

I'm sorry you have had such a hard time!

So sorry you had such a bad day! Try and keep that horrible feeling in mind for next time you want to turn to sweets during stress (or any time for that matter). If you remember how bad it made you feel you may turn to some other way to deal with the stress.

We are human. It's ok. It was one cookie, it does not mean you are going to backslide into morbid obesity. Now you know stress is a trigger, maybe invest in some nice lavender lotion or a stress ball for trying times. 

Sorry for the horrid day Melinda. It sounds like you had an RH episode with the cookie. Ick.

Hang in there. This is new for you, but you'll figure it out.

Aww girl, sorry you had such a crappy day. Maybe you can get one of those dammit dolls I've seen posted on here every now & then & bring it to work. Then you can take out your stress on the doll, it might seem silly but banging the hell out of that doll might help keep you away from the cookie! I saw the doll on Amazon, cheer up, tomorrow has gotta be better. 

I might need to get one of those...I cannot deal with feelings by eating them. I need to remember that and repeat a lot. 

God. I actually tensed up reading about your day, and I wasn't even there... But here's the thing,

I'm not trying to minimize your day, but I actually see this as a victory. This was a major stress event, and you ate a cookie (not all the cookies) That's the bad part. But within a couple of hours, you've recognized the behaviour, and your negative response. And I'm sure taking steps to make sure your response to the next stress event is different (because there will always be another one).

I have a feeling your response two years ago would have been very different. In my case, it would have been hours/days of eating and continuous grazing to distract or comfort myself. I think it's amazing what you've accomplished. 

Sorry you had a **** day, but you got this! And I'm sending that impatient trainer some side eye!

I'm trying to look at it that way and I'm trying to correct and not just chuck in the towel for the day which is absolutely what I've done in the past. But I'm struggling today. 

I guess I'm not clear why considering I've had really horrible and stressful work days before now. 

Iyou are right in that before my overindulgence would have been an entire bag of chips plus a carton of ice cream.