Getting started

Hi everyone,

I am new around here but plan to become a regular. I just went last week to my first consultation appointment with the bariatric surgeon.  I plan on having RNY as soon as I can get everything in order.  I have appointments set up for December and January so hopefully everything will go as planned and I will be having surgery in late February or March.  

I am having trouble getting started.  I have my required nutrition appointment next week and have to take 3 days worth of a food diary with me...and I am too ashamed to write down what I am choosing to eat.  I know I have an addiction...that is what got me to this point.  So I guess I am wondering what do they expect at my first nutrition appointment.  When were you all able to start with the healthy eating prior to surgery?  My doctor said that I was not required to loose any weight but I was not allowed to gain any while getting to my surgery date.  I think I would have done better if he would have demanded I loose a few prior, but I know I need to take control of this situation and start for myself! 

The nutrition appointment varies depending on the nutritionist.  Even though it is embarrassing, it is very good to track.  My surgeon gave me the advice to physically write things down, old school, with a pen and paper.  I thought I was being virtuous despite my lack of weight loss this summer (ha).  I literally carried it around and wrote EVERYTHING, including cough drops, etc.  Not counting gum, some days I was actually eating bites of things 20+ times!  It turns out I was unconsciously eating to sate my anxiety from work.

I think transitioning to a lower carbohydrate diet pre-op makes a lot of sense.  It will be much like you will eat after.

I was in weight loss mode for years pre-op.  I lost hundreds of pounds on a low carb path prior to WLS.  I reached a point where it crawled to a stand still and I had ravenous hunger.  WLS cured the hunger for me (I am fortunate and don't really feel hungry unless I eat carby food), and it also kick-started my weight loss again.

I will be honest here. I had many food funerals. I really know I have food a  addiction. It is real. You are not alone here. 

Maybe seeing a therapist would help also. Guilt is a bad thing to feel. It can send a person into a tailspin. 

Start telling yourself you deserve to be happy and healthy. Make lists of all the things you want to do.

Starting good habits before surgery do help in the long run. I made myself not drink with meals. Made sure I would chew my food. Clean all of the crap out of  your house. Tell yourself you are not a human trash can. 

You can do it if you put your mind to it. 

We are here to help you. Not judge. 

Sometimes things may not sound nice. But you can not hear a person's voice when they post. There are a lot of people who want you to do well. 

Take care of yourself don't be ashamed. 

I have already decided I think I will start seeing a therapist through this journey.  I think that will definitely help!  :)

It does help when someone other than family or friends validates what you are going through.

My therapist has helped me a lot. Not only with my WLS but with my life in general. 

I focused on making better food choices pre-op (ie grilled chicken instead of fried, fruit instead of cookies, etc). I did not track and was not able to cut back, either. I needed a tool to help me do that.

Make the changes you can, but don't beat yourself up. There are many of us who did not lose anything pre-op but still got to goal and stay there post-op, like me.

Good luck!!

Good luck on the journey. 

If I were you - I would be really honest with writing everything on my diet.

They can't help you - assist you, if you don't tell them the truth. 

I get frustrated when some of MO people I meet (IRL or on line) tell me that they barely eat anything, they are always on a diet and not only they can't lose weight but they gain.  I know at least 99% of them are lying to themself, more so than to me. The 1% - that tell the truth - have a serious metabolic syndrome, and/or water retention.  But ...no one regular size adult  can gain weight while eating just 900 calories a day...it is physically impossible.. Or very close to impossible. Unless they are supper short... Or very very small frame... And not active at all.. Bed rest... 

 IRL - I can see what they eat -and how much.  I was "them" ...I've been there.   When I went to my first appointment - I was honest.  Lets face it - those people see a lot of patients. They know that to get to be MO or SMO - we eat. Not only the wrong foods - but a lot of it. 

If they can't assess what is your issue - volume eater- binging- constant grazer-lots is sugary items/drinks..etc, they may not be able to advise you what can be best WLS surgery for you.  And any other treatment. 

A while back I asked some of my skinny friends what is their secret... All of them told me " I don't really eat a lot, and I am very selective what I eat" . This is my reality now - post op WLS -RNY.  To maintain my weight - I really don't eat a lot. And anything I eat are mostly protein forward, good fats and some veggies and fruits. 

My issue was sugar - I was not eating a lot - but I loved any sweets. Or bread.  Or grains. Carbs were my addiction. My doc told me that RNY could give me best chance to get to goal and stay there.  Post op RNY some of us get sick if we eat too much sugar or carbs.  In a way I "was lucky " and sugars and grains, carbs can make me really sick.  I hate being that sick... So I don't eat that foods.  And since that was my main issues - I not only can lose weight but I also maintain the loss.  It is a blessing and a curse for me..."be careful what you wish for"... 

If you have binging issue - or grazing - no WLS will help you unless you get also get help figuring out why you do it - maybe even get meds to help you deal with whatever it is you are dealing with.  

I know sweets are my main issue. (and even sodas which I know HAVE to go).  I have done it before for long periods of time but every time I think I will just have one because it has been a year and one won't hurt....then my addiction starts back!  So I know that I have to stop and NEVER touch it again because it is like a drug to me.  

 I don't eat much through the day and then often eat a lot in the evenings as well which definitely has to change.

  I went to my appointment stating I wanted RNY and the doctor suggested that I at least consider the sleeve because he thought I would do fine with both.  He stated there was half the chance of a lea****urring with sleeve since there are less cuts.  But I looked into both and I need RNY because I need dumping syndrome as part of my tool!  I know the sleeve helps reduce the hunger hormones but I rarely feel hungry and that causes me to eat.  I eat because it is time to eat and there is food there.  Or I want that something sweet!  So I really think RNY would be a better choice for me.  He said he thinks that would be fine but just wanted to make sure I was aware of my options.  

I hate to disappoint you ... but only 30%of RNY dumps. and even then - it can take a lot of sugar to cause that. I dump - but over the last8 years- my dumping is much less if any... and ...I know I can eat some sweets if I chose to do that.   i.e. cakes and cookies, cheesecake, hard candies, chocolate...  I KNOW how to "cheat" RNY if I chose to do that.  I keep a candy bar handy when my BS drops. I can eat a whole candy bar without major issues. And I am "a dumper". I can dump very hard- very fast on things taht are "liquid" sugars like ice cream, baileys, sweat tea (taht someone gave me telling me it has splenda not sugar ) 

I don't eat sweets because

• I have SIBO and IBS that acts up when I eat sugars (you really don't want that) - mostly caused by RNY - you really DON'T want that
• I developed severe food allergies post op RNY (most likely due to RNY - but who knows?)
• I follow paleo low carb diet - and I feel great when I eat "clean" . Carbs make me feel "sluggish" - sleepy and tired. 

don't count on dumping with RNY - even if you get it- once yu start eating sugar- little here and little there - the body get used to it and you may lose that..  
 

if I to have my WLS today - I  would go for the VSG. Unless there are issues like GERD... but- I have GERD now post op RNY...  yeap. Not cool. And i did not have one before. 

Really 30%?  I have read numbers usually around 80-85% but of course it varies in intensity.  That is a lot less than I expected!