DEXA Scan: Surprise emotional results!

Hi everyone.  I had a DEXA scan last week.  I have been looking forward to this because I have been wondering what my goal weight should be.  My doctor has refused to give me a goal weight.  I had read NYMom's experience with the DEXA scan, and then my husband's work was having a special for employees and family for $45.  Hooray! 

Well, the DEXA did give me the information I was hoping for, but I was surprised by my emotional response of discouragement. 

For the past few months, my weight has been pretty stable at 156-158.  I have thought I should work harder to get to 150, for a normal BMI of 150.  The scan suggests that I do need to improve my lean muscle mass/body fat ratio.  It suggests that yes, I do need to lose to perhaps 145. 

I thought I would take the data and say, "OK!  Here is my work ahead of me!"  Instead, I felt discouraged in a horrible way.  Like, all those self-destructive accuser thoughts:  "You stupid fat girl.  You are fat fat fat.  You look fat.  Whatever made you think you look good?  You have not worked at all!  You are a lazy bum."  Etc etc.  Fill in the blank with your own too-familiar negative thoughts.

I find that my way of dealing with the negativity is to avoid addressing what I need to do to really finish.

Feeling really torn.  And although I have in the past felt like I am in charge, I am having a large burst of feeling like "nothing I do matters."  I know this is wrong to think this way.  That is why I am coming here.

Definitely, I do need to up my game.  The easy weight loss time is over for me.  I have honestly loved how I look and feel at my current weight (except for bouts of dysmorphia, especially nude in the mirror).

Help?

You have lost 110 lbs! That's remarkable! If you feel good at your current weight and you are able to maintain it pretty well, then you just not worry about it. Why do you have to weigh 145 lbs? If you want to try to get to 145 lbs that is fine but don't let this scale discourage you.

Thank you!  I guess it is just an arbitrary number.  

Question number 1 is, would you be healthier at 145? If the answer is yes, then try to get there. 

If the answer is no, then think about why this is important to you. If it means that much, either figure out how to get there, or figure out how to be happy where you are.

We all struggle with these issues, to some degree. In the end,  peace of mind and being happy means a great deal. Some are happier working really hard to lose and maintain that last ten pounds. Some are happier living with it. 

Struggle with it for a while. Kick it around. In the end, I hope you're happy with your choice.

Thanks for this Grim.  It was great to be reminded that figuring out the final resting place is a struggle we all have to work through.  I really appreciated the advice to remember to focus on health, and also the advice to asit with the discomfort and ambiguity for awhile as a way of figuring out what I want.  Really, thanks very much.

I get it.  Ugh.. At the same time - read more abot body fat %... Sometimes the recommended body fat % applies to much younger group or men in general. So do your own research. 

I am 5'4"...and I am at 152 now..BMI 26...but I don't see a lot of fat on my body... But as a formally MO person I am not sure if it is my perception of being skin and bones...or reality. 

I am having DEXA scan in a week. And I know that for a woman in my age group - if my body fat % is 30% or more - I have work to do; between 25-30 ...I am doing great...and I can lose more, but I don't have it.  If it is 20-25%. I would need to maintain and not lose more body fat...but if it is below 20 - I would need to gain ....

Check healthy body fat% for woman your age - not an athlete..see where you really are. 

And if your body fat % is not optimal- work on increasing the muscle mass without gaining weight. 

Sometimes the people who offer DEXA scans are from a gym and they have a good reason to tell people that their body fat % is not ideal so they join a gym and pay membership.  

You have done amazing! It is so easy to jump into those negative talk, but remember that is a habit - Just as much is your eating habits - that you now have the ability to change..

Also , consider the fact that you probably are carrying 5 lbs or more of excess skin alone. So don't put too much weight - sorry, pun intended - on that 145 number.

if you haven't lifted weights or done bodyweight exercises before, those can make you feel great and further trim fat. Just keep in mind that muscle weighs more than fat, so your weight may not go down - might even go up a little bit. 

Keep up the good work and give yourself a hug for everything you have accomplished!

I wouldn't use extra skin as an excuse for what I weigh. Skin weighs an amazingly small amount when it is off the body and without fat and water in it.

Yeah, I have found myself wanting to say that xtra weight is skin!  But that seems like an easy self justification.  I do not doubt that the ski weighs something, but it feels like the things I used to say to myself:  "oh, those pounds are jus****er weight". Or "my heavy winter clothing" etc.

Right.  And a DXA scan shouldn't really take your skin into account.