Gaining confidence - in a bad way?

So, all my life I have basically been a doormat to anyone that wanted to walk on me.  The last few years I have been extra "doormatty" since I was at my highest weight I felt like I was not good enough to say no, or to complain about anything.   

Well now, as the weight is coming off and I am treating myself better I feel like I deserve to be treated well by others too.  Makes sense, right?

I have been standing up for myself at work since I have been back from surgery and now people are getting mad at me.  I stood up to my boss for constantly taking advantage of me by making me do other people's work because they are too lazy to do it and I am fast at my job, and today I FINALLY stood up to a woman that for the last 15 years has treated me (and everyone else) like crap and I made her run to the bathroom crying.  Then she spent the next 30 minutes in my supervisors office crying to her.  
NOW WHAT????   I don't know how to stand up for myself in the right way I guess?

So, all my life I have basically been a doormat to anyone that wanted to walk on me.  The last few years I have been extra "doormatty" since I was at my highest weight I felt like I was not good enough to say no, or to complain about anything.   

Well now, as the weight is coming off and I am treating myself better I feel like I deserve to be treated well by others too.  Makes sense, right?

I have been standing up for myself at work since I have been back from surgery and now people are getting mad at me.  I stood up to my boss for constantly taking advantage of me by making me do other people's work because they are too lazy to do it and I am fast at my job, and today I FINALLY stood up to a woman that for the last 15 years has treated me (and everyone else) like crap and I made her run to the bathroom crying.  Then she spent the next 30 minutes in my supervisors office crying to her.  
NOW WHAT????   I don't know how to stand up for myself in the right way I guess?

ugh.. postop some of us get really hormonal... not in  good way.. *****y.... 

I have always been assertive at work, even at my biggest. BUT I am experiencing this wiht my social life big time! I get treated so differently, and I find myself reacting to that. My friends are not really sure how to handle me. They were always the alphas and made all the decisions and I just sort of tagged along and contributed whatever they told me to. Now, I'm busier, making plans of my own.... they are not at all willing to conform to MY plans or ideas... they want me to cancel my stuff and do their things. They get mad that i (of course) won't. 

It's so bizarre. and these aren't bad people, it's just that our entire dynamic has been changed by my newfound sense of security and new attitude. It is what it is... I am taking it one day at a time. Friends come and go. the ones that leave are usually ones you're better off without. 

It would be very scary to me if this same phenomenon (or similar) were to be happening at my job!!!! I hope it doesn't start to affect your job security! I am proud of you and don't think you're doing anything wrong by sticking up for yourself, but it's not what they're used to! Good luck! 

You have to try to find that happy medium.  Being walked on is no good, and you want to be able to stand up for yourself in situations, but we also have to remember that sometimes we have to be sensitive about HOW we deal with things.

I'm not saying you did anything wrong at all, because I don't know what exactly your situation is.  But I will say that you might want to analyze how you are reacting to others.  Standing up is good, just don't turn around and become what you are wanting to change.  

Thanks, I don't see it affecting my job security but I just feel kind of guilty like I should just go back to the old way of doing whatever people tell me to and just suck it up :(

why would you want to go back to who you were when you are working so hard at saying goodbye to that version of you? You yourself called that version a "doormat" and I believe you need to embrace your new you and just find ways to make any necessary adjustments to sort of refine the delivery (maybe?) or just be patient. over time the others will get used to this you. don't purposefully go back to being a doormat!!!! 

What is right is not usually what's easy! 

Thank you, I guess I just need practice at being assertive.  I feel like I need to let people know that I am not the old me, but maybe I am showing it in the wrong way?   Maybe I will just observe other assertive people, lol. 

It's a fine line to walk, lol.  I've always been the giver, the nice one, etc.  I am dealing with this kinda, but haven't had to get really *****y yet.  We'll see how it is going forward.

YES!  It is, I am the nice one that everyone likes and knows will do anything for them.  I still think I am very nice, I just want to set some boundaries.