Survey: How do you respond to THAT question

i don't think that you need to refrain from posting advice, Gary, but I think you may want to stop and think about the way your advice comes across.  Do you think that someone trying to prepare for eventual questions, which may or may not come, is actually a red flag or something that could be wrong with their thinking about weight loss surgery?  That is what I find off base. Maybe I can't see it, and you have a legitimate concern, but it seems so far out of left field to me.

I think worrying and planning is completely normal as we prepare for surgery. There are SO many unknowns when we start our journey, lots of us like to mentally prepare for every kind of scenario.

Some people get lots of questions. Some people get none at all. Depends on your journey and the kind of people who are around you.

So no, not a red flag at all.

I am already a private person to begin with, but I believe when it comes to my health and my body, it's REALLY no one's business. I also carry myself in such a way that most people (aside from close friends who know about the surgery) wouldn't feel comfortable asking, so that helps. 

I've lost 130 pounds in 13 months and while people have asked HOW, no one has directly asked if I've had surgery. I haven't been faced with lying, but I am prepared to lie if anyone ever does have the audacity to ask. I think that's a very rude question of people who don't know me well. 

When people ask how I'm doing it, I tell them I only eat meat. or I say "high protein, almost no carbs" or "i don't eat much" or "it's not been easy!" just a short one liner that usually shuts them down from asking follow-ups. Again, my demeanor is not very inviting, so they're often a bit apprehensive even of asking me how I did it. I haven't lied yet, but when it comes to people I work with or that I simply don't want them to know, I would. I don't ask them if they had a nose job or got their boobs done, or if they've had a hysterectomy. 

I know there are a lot of people that have other opinions on this topic, but that's what works and fits for my personality, lifestyle, and comfort zone. And to me, those things are all that matters TO ME. :) 

Nobody has ever asked me directly if I have had surgery. Though, I have had some people make assumptions that because I didn't proactively announce that I had surgery and tell the world myself, that I didn't have it. It's a weird position to be in for sure.

I often answered, "I don't eat anything that tastes good!" with a laugh and that always changed the subject. But, if anybody that could benefit (quality) from surgery - no matter how well I knew them - asked me how I lost weight, I would always tell them privately. I didn't want them to not have all of the information.  I wanted to feel like I could help someone else.

Now that I'm three years out, I still don't announce it but I would tell anybody that asks. Oddly enough, by the time enough time had passed that I was more comfortable sharing, nobody asks anymore. People don't comment on my weight (hardly) ever anymore. I prefer it that way!

I've found that most people don't directly ask "how did you do it?" unless they, too, are trying to lose weight.  If someone does ask, I tell them the truth. Mostly because why would I withhold information which could benefit them as much as it's benefitted me?  If I can help just one person achieve what I have and feel as good as I do, I'm totally happy to share.

my typical answer was "very hard work." 

but if someone asked me if i had surgery - I either said "yes", or ask them "why do you ask, you think you need it?" 

While I'm a pretty private person, I was very open from the beginning about my surgery.  The day before I went to the hospital, I sent a staff email saying that I was going to be gone for two weeks and why I was leaving.  I knew that it was only going to be a matter of time before people noticed my rapid weight loss, and I'd rather them know the truth rather than have rumors going around that I was sick or something like that.

I've never been comfortable with just giving the "diet and exercise" answer.  I gave this as an answer one time, and I felt guilty afterwards.  To me, it felt like I was lying and I was ashamed of getting my surgery.  It's true, of course, but it's not the whole truth.  Since then, my standard short answer is usually along the lines of, "I had surgery, and now I follow my diet and I exercise."  Plus, my story has been published in local magazines and newspapers, so it's not like I'm trying to keep a lid on it anyways.

I am also a very private person, and I was going to only tell a few close people. HOWEVER, this news spread like wildfire and everyone knows now.  I'm ok with that now, everyone has been very supportive so far.

Before surgery, I was thinking I wasn't going to tell anyone except close family.  But, as I got closer to surgery I got braver and cared less & less about other people's reactions.  I was ready and I learned to be proud that I was making a solid choice to become healthy.  The day before surgery I posted this on my FB page:

• I'm taking a big leap into my future on Leap Day this year. The past 6 months I have been going through a process to get approved for gastric bypass weight loss surgery and Monday is my big day at UVA. I'm really excited to be embarking on this new journey. Some people may think that this is the "easy way" to lose weight but let me tell you, this isn't for sissies. All the research and hard work I've put into it this have shown me it's going to be one of hardest things that I have ever set out to accomplish. I'm kinda nervous about it and yet confident that this new tool will be a game changer. I'd really appreciate your love and support for the journey ahead. If y'all could, please say a little prayer and send some positive energy my way. Thanks!

I don't regret it one bit.  I've gotten more support than I imagined, and I haven't gotten one single negative comment.  I think putting it up front gave people a chance to deal with any negativity they have on their own before noticing my weight loss and asking about it.  My post was a "pre-emptive strike" on any negativity.  I'm out and I'm proud and I don't have to worry about anyone asking how I did it.