Worried... Sleep consult did not go as planned!

Hi all. Hope everyone is having a good Monday.  I had my consult for a sleep study this morning.  No big deal, or so I thought.  I thought I'd go in, we'd chat, they'd schedule a sleep study, and that would be it.  Nope.  She came in, and I instantly liked her.  We talked, and then she put her light on her head and took a stick and took a good long look at my mouth.  

I guess I should give a bit of history and let you know that I've not slept a full night since I was a child.  It takes me hours to fall asleep and I'm awake so many times during the night that I no longer count.  There are nights that I never even doze off.  I've been prescribed many sleeping pills and have never found one that helped me rest successfully.  I'm a worrier, and I worry about everything, all the time.  When I lay down to sleep, it's like bumper cars in my brain.  My brain never stops.  And I toss and turn all night long.  The best thing that has helped me so far has been xanax, however, I've been out of it for some time now.  It just helped me to relax a bit to fall asleep.  

Anyway, onto this morning.... 

She said "honey, you have a tiny mouth and a BIG tongue".  Big deal, right?  Then she sat down and proceeded to tell me that the reason I do what I do at night is because most people have a U-shaped mouth, and mine is more closely related to a V, and a tongue that is too big for my mouth.  She said my brain is smart and what it's doing is keeping me awake to keep me alive.  There's nowhere for my tongue to go when I sleep except down my throat, cutting off my airway.  She said she can't believe I'm 44 and this has not presented itself until now.  I told her that my sleep has always been a problem, but I'd always been handed pills.  She said whatever I do, don't take sleeping pills because they have some muscle-relaxer tendencies and that could be deadly to me in my sleep.  So I have broke down and am absolutely terrified to even try to fall asleep now.  Scared to death.  She is positive that I have sleep apnea and she also said that most people get to come off the CPAP machine when they lose weight, but that won't happen for me, due to the shape of my mouth.  I have a sleep study on the 23^rd, then a week or so after that I will get the results, then have to go back to get a CPAP, and follow up with her on May 16^th.  So I definitely won't be having surgery in April, as I'd hoped.  I just can't believe I'm that close to death when I try to sleep.  I guess I've woke up for 44 years, so another few weeks should be fine.  However, I can tell you that I will be a wreck come bedtime.....  

Anyone else experience anything similar to this?  I really hope not... I wouldn't want anyone to have that worry.  I live with my children, and obviously do not plan to share this information with them, because I don't want them to worry.  But I don't have a sleep partner to 'monitor' my sleep, or lack thereof.  

Thoughts??

Starting a CPAP is a HUGE help if you've had trouble sleeping! Before surgery I did not sleep through the night and nearly fell asleep at the wheel several times. I got my CPAP and even though it took time to get used to it, it made an ENORMOUS difference in how I felt, even after a few nights. So hopefully you'll be feeling better quickly!

If you don't have anyone to monitor your sleep, could you get a fitness band that tracks your sleep? Lots of them, like wrist-worn Fitbit and Jawbone and the like, can watch your sleep/wake cycle and put reports on your phone. There are several available for around $50 on sale, like the Garmin Vivofit, and you'll find them helpful once you have surgery too.

Thank you so much!!  I do have a Fitbit and it does well at tracking my slee***** sleep.  I'm just nervous because after talking with her, this is much more serious than I could've ever imagined.

Oh I understand completely. When I got the data back from my sleep study and it was obvious that I had apnea, I TOTALLY freaked out. I thought I'd just been stuffy, but the diagnosis meant I was at an even greater risk for stroke and dying early and all sorts of terrifying things.

The good news is that you're getting on top of this! Hopefully it won't take long at all to get your gear and get started on it, and you won't be worried for much longer. Fingers crossed that it all goes smoothly!

Thank you so much!!! 

My take on it?  Why be nervous?  You've lived with it for 44 years and weren't really diagnosed. You were treated, true, but nothing was resolved.  Now you have answers to *why* you couldn't sleep and a possible solution.  While it's true the wls has to be postponed, it isn't cancelled so that's  a positive!  Think of how great you'll feel getting some solid sleep AND losing weight in a few months!

Thank you!!  I'm trying to get a better grip now... I was just so scared and upset.  I was caught completely off guard.  Thought I knew how it was going to go.... That's what I get for thinking, huh?

Same thing happened to me when I went for my stress test.  I thought "No big deal!"  until the results came back with a possible blockage in my heart.  Off to see a cardiologist.  He had to do a heart cath to confirm one way or the other and I was scared to death!  the good news was I have/had big boobs and it was their shadow on the test that was being seen!  But now I know that my heart looks just fine :)

WOOO HOOOO!!!  Yay for big boobs!!!  :)

Get your CPAP as soon as you can.  It will change your life!  Once you get accustomed to it, you will wonder how you ever managed to get through the day without it.

But promise you will be patient with yourself as you become accustomed to it and find a mask or nasal pillows that works for you.  Do not give up on it!

I had many tearful nights when I would wake up with my mask thrown across the room, or the machine making noise from getting disconnected, or my sinuses so dry it hurt to move my eyes, or practically drowning in my sleep when condensation would enter my nose.  ALL of these problems are EASILY solved!!!

Your respiratory therapist is your best friend; don't be afraid to call him/her to tell them when you are having problems.  And heck, if she/he isn't helpful (unlikely, but it can happen), PM me!

In the meantime, you could pin a sock with a tennis ball or two in it to the back of your pajamas.  This will keep you from rolling onto your back.  Sleeping on your side might make your tongue a little less likely to relax towards the back of your throat (and thus blocking air).