Ugh....some people!

Aw, thanks Robin

People will always have something to say. I choose to shut them down before they can start talking about it. Mention something about them and they will forget what they were talking about.

Opinions are like ********everyone has one.  

Words to the wise: keep your personal health information to yourself as much as possible.  It's no one's business and you'll find that everyone will have an opinion and the majority will be negative. You don't need that in your life! 

I know in our social-medial-tell-everything-transparent world that people feel an overwhelming need to share everything...and to know everything.  Just don't buy into it. Protect yourself by keeping your private stuff private.  

And if you're young and haven't been morbidly obese for decades you have a super-good chance of getting good skin "snap back".  I'm pulling for you on that one!  

Yeah I'm not planning on putting it out there on my FB, nor have I told many people in my family. Just my close friends and my brother and their wives since I see them almost weekly. I had to tell my dad and step-mom because he was driving me the day of surgery and I it was eating me up that I wasn't telling him the whole truth on what the surgery was for. I figured he would have been judgemental about it because he has shared his concern about my weight a few times, but he wasn't. 

Unfortunately I'm no spring chicken anymore and have been teetering between 215 and 245 for the last 15 years so I'm not certain my skin will snap back...but I'm gonna pray it will 

I think that a lot of us are "people pleasers" when we are obese.  I think we are often so vulnerable to the prejudices against overweight people, that we learn to accept comments and unfettered "advice" in an effort to be affable and likable.  

I would like to suggest to you that you do not have to accept rude commentary on your health choices.  My pat answer now when friends or family say something that is rude is simply, "Why would you say something like that to me?"  and then I just wait.  If they try to justify it, I simply repeat myself.  Because you know what?  I have a right to be treated with respect and care.

So do you.

You mentioned these things are coming from your friends and family.  You have a right to curtail this.  We have the whole world ready to tear us down.  We don't need the people closest to us to help them along.  

So I ask you this -- Why do you let people say things like that to you?  Do you feel that you deserve rude comments simply because you are overweight?  I ask this, because these feelings and reactions are something to address -- because they often contribute to why we got fat in the first place.  Rarely do we eat because we are actually hungry.  There's often a distinct emotional aspect to it, too.  That's the "head" work that so many vets speak about.

You are not gross now and you will not be "flabby and gross" when you have better control of your health.  What's more, no one has the right to suggest these things to you.  

Have I told you recently that I love you Kat the Small?  But you really must stop rattling around inside my head saying things I think but don't say out loud.  I am going to take a page from your incredilby wise book and remember that I don't have to take crap off of anybody anymore. Thank you for plucking that out of the depths.  

You, my Berry friend, are awesome 

I love you, too Berry Sister.  I swear, we were separated at birth or something.  

Ever thought about co-writing a book with a fellow berry-lover about the emotional aspects of obesity and the emotional journey of losing an entire person in body-weight?  

All the fricking time - I am so onboard with that idea!

We should make that happen.

This is one of the best things I have ever read. Seriously.