Clarity ensues

As a cautionary tale....I was in an abusive relationship for years and finally escaped only to be stalked for several years.  Eventually I started having health issues and sought medical attention and was told I was depressed.  I scoffed at that diagnosis thinking how could that cause body aches and extreme fatigue so I ignored the doctors.  Years later along comes internet and after much research realized the docs were right all along.  Now I am disabled with many health issues along with worsened mental issues in part from leaving my depression and ptsd untreated. I am not saying that this can happen to anyone, since it also takes a predisposition, but depression is a real illness.

On a lighter note...props to your wife for being so understanding and loving you enough to take this seriously. 

Thank you for sharing this with me. I've yet to crack up at anything as much as your comment "uh, your drawstring in showing" in the legwarmer photo. It caught me just right and I laughed what is left of my butt off. And here is something I NEVER do...(use emoji's).

Humor helps us get through so much.  Glad I could make you laugh!!!

I am so glad you talked to your wife and that she's supportive.  

Wishing you the best, Gary.

What you wrote is what got to her. She has a family member that suffers from an addiction to drugs, so it really hit home. You helped my wife deal with an unresolved issue so, Thank You again! What you write helps alot of us Kat.

Thank you for saying so.

Hey Gary!  I'm so glad you were able to sit down and talk with your wife about your ups and downs of surgical weight loss.  There are highs and lows, feelings of being deprived of food (I used it as a reward and can't do that any more) and many more emotions to count during this journey.  Everyone is different and handles it differently.  By showing your wife the posts, that hopefully helped open lines of communication with her and allows her to help you on your journey.  It's not easy to describe to someone who hasn't been there, it's hard even if you have.  The main thing I'm trying to tell you is that you are NORMAL!!  It's OK to seek counsel to try to understand what our bodies are going thru.  We have thrown it for a loop, that's for sure!  It does get easier as we go along and the compliments will eventually stop coming as we get closer to our goal weight and I'm sure that will bring another set of emotions to the table.  Keep talking to her and keep her in your circle!  Your wife is a keeper!  I liked her from the first time I met her, and this just proves how great she is!  I'm here for you too!  Have a safe and happy New Year!!

Gary, 

Well done.  I am inspired by you and encourage you to be as honest with the therapist.  Your posts help more people than you know.  I'm so glad you were able to have the conversation with your wife.  

Best,

Lisa

Dear Gary,

I am very happy that you spoke to your wife from your heart and that you are seeking professional help. 

I found after having R-N-Y six years ago that the lack of my drug of choice (processed carbs mostly) left me feeling depressed and angry.  Food had been a way to escape reality same as a drug addict or alcoholic may used other substances. For a while I relied on wine to feel better, and had to recognize this could become a problem if I did not cut out alcohol completely.

Please bear in mind as you move forward on your weight-loss journey of the high incidence of alcoholism and drug abuse post-WLS.   I have participated in several WLS supports groups and have found this tendency to transfer food addiction to other forms of addictions a real problem most surgeons don't warn you about.

Best wishes,

Maria

Gary,

I just signed in today and read your two posts... I think we have a very wise board of individuals here, but one thing I did not see addressed.  When it comes to male hormones there are certain essential elements you need to release and to convert/ or not convert those to the proper amounts,

 .The key element for my husband has been zinc. He is currently on 220 mg., to maintain the male hormone balance.... so when you go for evaluation, be sure to to get all your essentials checked, to make sure there is not a vitamin, mineral, supplement out of balance, and adding to your  struggle.

I went thru some periods of depression, I think most people go thru it at some point.You are not alone.