Fears and Doubts

Hi everyone.

50 year old black male, 315 lbs, just under six feet.  This is it - tried everything else, nothing else works.  But I am having doubts and fears about it.  Primarily because I don't want to give up food - crazy right.

Weight loss surgery will not help until you are ready to give up the wrong foods.  Please work with a therapist.

Good thing you're not giving up food then; you are just putting yourself in a position where you have to make better choices with food. 

My fears were more to do wrong coming out of surgery with more health problems than I went in with. My doubt was if it'dwork.  When you've tried everything and nothing works, doubting the next option is totally rational.

It will work. You have to be dedicated to reaching the outcome. Discipline will come with dedication. 

When is surgery? 

Well, you're just a little feller. You should be able to do a great job with surgery.

I had the same fesrs. It turns out I didn't give up food at all. There are only a few things that I choose not to eat now, that I used to eat before. I did have the give up the large quantities. And Little Debbie and Wendy are no longer speaking to me.

You'll do great, but coming to grips with why we used to eat so much is the hardest part.

Hi.

I am 4 months out and I was just like you before mine. I was also up against a wall, because I could not live another day at 385. So, I went ahead with it, I made my peace with food. It was the only way I was going to survive. 

It's a lifestyle change to me. I changed my approach to hunger and satiation. My family did not even have to change the food they ate. Those fears and doubts will fade, you'll change your approach, and all will be well with the next 30 years of your life. This is my hope for my life. I hope you choose to live a healthier life, it's worth it.

Good Luck on this great journey.

53 year old female here, 11.5 years after surgery.  Still eat yummy food, but less ...   Have survived without ice cream and cake - good chocolate is still my friend - just not the whole bar.

This is doable, but if you want to be successful in the long term, you will have to learn to enjoy quality over quantity ...

I just had my surgery 9 days ago.  I looked into surgery for many years, paid my portion a few times, but backed out thinking,  "is there ONE more thing I could do?" So I tried ONE more thing several times.  I even had a weight-loss coach from my insurance call me every 2-4 weeks and discuss how I could change things up, etc.  I only lost 12 pounds the whole year.  I finally decided to get the sleeve surgery and jumped through all the hoops my insurance required.  When I spoke with the psychologist, I had an epiphany that what I was doing, in essence, was divorcing food, but we still had to live in the same house hold. You're not giving up food forever, you're just giving it up for a short time while you readjust your thinking and eating habits.  It does have to become a permanent mind set, or the weight won't stay off. But this tool will give you the breaking in period you need in order to readjust your thinking to lose the weight.  It's a life-changing decision, but for me, it was worth it. 

Trust me, you're not going to have to give up food. You WILL have to learn to choose the right food, 95% of the time, but most people eventually are able to enjoy any foods they choose.

What???  Give up food?  Nobody told me I had to give up food!

With my DS, I've lost all of my weight in 13 months, and am over a decade post op only regaining 14% of the 15-25% of expected regained ewl.  I'm pretty stoked even today, and yeah, eating all kinds of food!

Thanks for the positive affirmations everyone.  I truly needed them.  Have not been posting - getting prepped for my sleeve surgery on 18 February.  It feels good to have a date.  I have one more appointment - to meet with my surgical team.  The only thing that scares me now is the post-op pain and discomfort - I'm a priss when it comes to pain.  But I'll cross that bridge when I get to it.