SkinnyScientist
on 12/15/15 12:41 am

One of the things I am most grateful for, that it took me over 38 years to learn, is that people and situations DO/CAN change.

In the weightloss phase post-op, there were days/weeks when I felt that change was happening too slowly, yet I got there.

There was a vet on this site [Selhard, Lady Tazz, Grim, or White Dove?] that repeatedly said "Your tastes will change" post op.

While this vet was talking about eating in particular, this statement has been true in other ways. While I no longer like foods that are too sweet artifically/naturally, my tastes in clothing and activities have changed. In the distant past, I wasn't too keen on exercise. I did what I could but I would have never paid for a personal trainer or a coach [e.g. figure skating]. Now, I make room in my budget for these splurges to get the results I want and get upset when surprises appear in my schedule which make me "give up" my time with them. I like my coaches and trainers so much more than any bite of icecream. I feel accomplished when I achieve a new small goal with them. I do not feel accomplished from eating sundaes or finishing a cappachino.

My tastes in clothing have changed. I used to wear a lot of black, grey, and drab brown. Anything to hide/blend in. I hated patterns when MO because I felt I looked more like a walking mural than a person wearing a patterned dress. Today, at the holiday party, I am going to wear a daring military style shimmering gold dress which I feel makes me look like a follower of C3PO...which is perfect because it is gold for the holidays and has that Star Wars feel for the upcoming movie. I will really pull it off or I really wont, but either way it will be really something. Which is what real fashion is supposed to do [i.e. make statements; convey a message/idea]. I now love dressing in such a manner that I could blend in with advertisements in Vogue versus the drab backgrounds of "vanilla" offices.

I like how my identity has changed. I was my mothers "big one", not the oldest. She now cant say that. While in high school I wasnt MO, I did struggle with keeping my weight down and could easily gain which lead to a lot of starvation diets. Now, people who didnt know my MO call me things like "tall and thin" and that I "can probably eat anything". Me! Tall AND thin! And sometimes, I watch the training videos of me skating (to see what is going wrong with a jump) and I just have to pause and go "Wow. I AM THIN". I like that I am developing a different/alter ego. I dont have good hand eye coordination and was picked last for gym classes (understandably) in the distant past. But now I am a certified Tae Bo instructor, work with other instructors to lead class. People at the gym look at me to to see the moves that I use in MY WORKOUT and I can outplank my personal trainer! I really like this new identity of being the fit/strong person. It took me awhile to find activities in which I excel at or be able to forgive myself for not excelling in some activities that produce big results and to keep doing them just to keep their benefits [e.g. running. I will never be sub-8 runner. i had to forgive myself for not being super fast but I can appreciate and work to improved mileage, endurance, and muscle tone].

So I am grateful that things/tastes do change!