Mourning Food

Has anyone found themselves in mourning over food?  I am extremely grateful for the opportunity I've been given to have WLS.  This is something I have wanted for so many years.  My recovery is going well, no complaints.

I force myself to eat my full fluid meals because I have no hunger (no idea what that episode that I had this morning was all about).  However, my husband must eat.  He has grabbed a bite out a few nights this week except last night and tonight, he cooked his own meals.

The aromas that come from the kitchen are making me crazy and sad.  Last night he had a vegetarian pizza.  The leftovers are in the refrigerator.  It looks so yummy.  Tonight he fixed shrimp ****tail, roasted green beans, and cottage cheese.  OMG, I am about to go nuts.  This was one of my favorite meals before surgery.

If my knee was able I would go outside for a walk.  But that is not possible.  I think I will go take a hot shower, maybe it will help me out of this funk.

you'll be able to eat shrimp ****tail, cottage cheese, and roasted green beans soon enough.  I ate things like that a lot early on.  Pizza is another story, though.  Although I've had it twice since I passed the six-month mark - but I don't eat the crust.  I take a piece and scrape the toppings off and eat those.

I know I will be able to enjoy real food in the future.  I'm just feeling depressed about not being being able to have my favs now yet I have to smell the aromas coming from the kitchen.

The pizza in itself doesn't appeal to me, it's just the idea I can't have it if I wanted to.  Two weeks before my surgery I discovered Cauliflower Cheese Pizza.  It was so good. This is where my brain is taking me when I look at the leftover pizza that's in my refrigerator.  I know I will be able to enjoy it again in a couple of months.

Thank you for your caring reply.

Yes!!!! I totally feel that! I hate it! I had my surgery 2 weeks before my birthday and I was almost depressed over not being able to eat. My friends didn't know what to do with me either haha. I don't know if it helps me or not but I tend to ask people what they have eaten lately like I am living vicariously through them or something :)

My understanding is with you. I not only have to see and smell foods I can't/shouldn't have but I have to cook them for husband each and every day. However, as the weight comes off and you look and feel better about yourself things you shouldn't eat become less important and you start to wonder why other people want to eat that stuff! Eventually it will catch up with them and their health. Like all mourning you will work through it and the loss will get easier.

I 100% understand what you are going through! When I was in the liquid phase I cried and (almost) regretted my decision because all of the happy times in my life revolve around food. My cousin said it was like mourning the loss of a best friend. She is exactly right... Food has been with us our whole lives and supported us when we are sad, happy, bored etc. PEople come and go but food has never abandoned us. Food is a comfort. Once I hit the Bariatrics soft foods my attitude changed. I was finally able to taste different flavors and it was wonderful. I don't really have cravings anymore. I have 2 kids so we have snacks in the house but it doesn't really phase me to have them there. Hang in there. You will be ok, just stick to the plan and it will pay off. 

You really do understand! I know once I hit the soft food stage I will feel better.  Thank you for "getting" me.

I STILL have those moments, so don't think that the feelings will go away.  Just be prepared and have a million other things to do.  Also, try to stay positive because those feelings creep in and try to take over.  I hate that head game!  Stay strong; like you said, soon you will be able to go for a walk and do other things.  Good luck!

Yes! For people with food addiction, food is happiness! Food is comfort when we are sad. It means SO much. If we are so depressed about not eating certain things that we can't enjoy loved ones around us on our birthday, it's about more than just food.

I found therapy has helped but it still hasn't totally gone away, it will be a struggle I will have for my whole life.

I know EXACTLY how you feel. I'm almost 3 months post op (have my 3 month follow up today) and i still have feelings of mourning about food. I try to journal and talk my way thru these feelings to try and figure out what is triggering them. I have found stress and family relationships tend to make my thoughts wonder to food. I know i will have to stay vigilant for the rest of my life with my relationship with food.

Hang in there. it does get easier.