In need of encouragement tivation

I am 2 years 9 months post op. I surpassed my goal - was very happy with my health and appearance. Got pregnant , and just celebrated my sons one year birthday. 

I had a problem free pregnancy and have lost almost all of the weight that I gained.. I am seven lbs till my goal weight. 

I am struggling staying focused, positive, and  lacking civfudencr on my ability to succeed. I feel like o am a failure because if I am struggling not even three years post op what will it be like in ten.

i  exhausted be my son won't sleep, and overwhelmed being back at work full time all the while trying to balance . marriage, university courses, my household, and other obligations, and sone sort of depression.

calorie wise I am 80% good at Sticking to my goal. Exercise, I don't have much more time for walking my dog , usually 45 mins a day.  I noticed I am falling back into habit of sneaking food and not journaling, and not journaling on weekends. 

I need help.. Finding motivation. The sense of failure is too much to bear 

You have already taken the hardest step by saying enough is enough and now I want to get back on track.  Here are some steps I hope will help you. They helped me...  

Planning/Preparing

Remember when we were preparing for surgery?  How many meetings, classes and such did we attend?  We were told the more prepared we were the better our chances were for success.  And they were right. Go through the house, car and work place and get rid of trigger foods.  Stock up on foods that will keep you on track. I removed every bad carb/sugar temptation and replaced it with lots of protein, veggies, grains and fruits.  

Journaling

Get back to journaling.  This will help you identify when you feel like eating, stress factors and any triggers in your life.  Once you identify these factors, this will help you put tools in place to keep you from eating.  It became clear I was not taking time for me anymore. I worked my day job and then spent the rest of my time caring for my husband.  It was easy to reach for fast, prepackaged food.  Since I purged my home I have to eat clean as there are no other options LOL

Use a tool to track you're eating and exercise like Getting Started with Health  Tracker.  Once I started to track ever bite and drink it became clear why I had gained.

Goals/Rewards

Make a list of goals for yourself.  Make them realistic and small.  Some of mine were move more, purge all junk from my home, eat more protein.

Food

In general, a long term post-weight loss surgery eating plan includes foods that are high in protein, and low in fat?, calories, and sugar. Important, vitamins and minerals are provided as supplements. (if you had a different surgery adjust this to your food plan).

Water

Water is our Best Friend. I have to say I never went back to pop or any bad drinks, however I was drinking tea like crazy. What is wrong with drinking tea?  I was either using sugar or 3 equals and 3 sweet n lows per 32 ounce glass.  So I was either pushing to be diabetic or get cancer.  I found once I started carrying a bottle of water around 24/7 (yes had one at my bedside) I lost the cravings for the sugar and I KNOW those artificial sweeteners are not good for me. Look I am old and if you add up all the artificial sweeteners I have consumed I am sure I am at the rat in the lab getting cancer threshold.

MOVE!

I can't say enough about how key this was for me. The reason I kept my weight off for almost 10 years was no matter what, I kept moving.  If I could not go to the gym I would walk. I loved Zumba, bootcamp workouts, lifting weights. When I stopped, the weight started coming back.  So for me I am starting slow to avoid injury by walking and using some of the workouts on my Demand TV.  Find something you love to do and it won't feel like a pain in the *** to do daily.

Support

If it's an option "run" don't walk to a support group.

Keep me posted on how you are doing

Thank you. What do you do in situations where you want to use food as comfort?

You are struggling with life. It's incredibly difficult to go to school,have a baby, and work full time. To your credit you did not gain massive amounts of weight with your pregnancy and you lost weight after. 

Now is when it gets real. We have to eat for the rest of our life no matter what life looks like. It's easier if you can take it a day at a time. Are there foods in your house that used to not be? Do you have people to help you in your busy life? What does it look like when you are eating what you like and what works for your plan? 

Congratulations on being a new mom. It's such a fun ride.

You are not a failure. 

Keep posting.

Deb

You are right. I had bought crackers, chips. Dip for my sons party. And those were the foods I was sneaking . Handful of chips here, couple of crackers there. 

I will give them away. 

I started taking s ziplock bag of celery and carrots to work to .. Munch on during the day to avoid going to the staff room for the snacks there

Do you often get the "eating for the sake of eating " feeling ?

   I've spent my life eating for the sake of eating. I like to eat to celebrate any occasion or feeling.

What I really like are simple carbs like cookies and crackers. Carbs start digesting the moment they hit your mouth. Immediate release. I can't have this stuff around or I will eat it. I'll tell you a story. Yesterday at the store I bought my son a package of lemon creame cookies. I don't like lemon cookies. Guess who ate lemon cookies? I did..they were there and I ate 2.

For me I have to have easily to prepare and eat protein. I'm buying yogurt,shrimp,already boiled eggs, and quest protein bars.  It's important to take care of my self and have things that will fill me up and work towards my plan.

Right now I'm working on increasing my non-caloric fluid intake. All these years and plain water still does not go down well for me.

Things that have helped me

   Hunger is not an emergency (thanks Jupiter6 wherever you are)  

    Eating proteins will fill me up.

    No one is perfect.

     Getting support on OH is valuable and important.

Take care,

Deb

7lbs from goal weight...that alone is a wonderful success many would envy. To be there and do all you do in your life is incredible. I hope you can lose that last 7 lbs but if not 7 lbs is nothing after all the pounds you have lost. I would say whole hearted congratulations to you for what you have done.

Could you possibly suffer from a bit of hormonal depression?  I know I was low-grade ppd for a good 15 months after my son was born -- and I didn't realize it until later.  Frankly, everyone on earth would struggle working full time, going to school and managing a family --- on top of being sleep deprived.  You sound completely reasonable to me. 

You certainly are not a failure.

You may be using coping devices that aren't best (sneaking food, not journaling, etc) -- but you are using coping devices.   You are certainly NOT a failure and that word used repeatedly tells me that maybe you should talk to someone about your feelings sooner than later.

Thank you for your reply.