Breaking the News Today

Well today I have chosen to tell my best friend and her husband, who happens to be the pastor of my church, about my WLS. They're coming over this afternoon and I plan on being straightforward and honest with them. My concern is that I won't get their blessing, not that I need it, but it would be great to have their support. I'm concerned about them not being supportive because my best friend sells herbal, all-natural weight loss and nutritional supplements and I've been taking them for a year without lasting results. I'm afraid of what my friend's reaction is going to be. I'm afraid she will be angry with me for not continuing with her company's products and I'm afraid she'll say I'm taking the "easy" way out, etc. I don't want our friendship to change because of my decision. But, my friends need to know what I'm going to do.

What do you all think?

I sincerely think you need to keep your medical issues to yourself. This is not going to go well

First, I think by inviting them over you are giving them the impression that their opinions have more weight than yours. It is nice if friends and family are agreeable but it is completely unnecessary. 

Second, your friend may be angry because she will be losing income from her herbal junk. She will just have to get over it.

Third, I thimk you are inviting arguments. It is your health. No one's approval or blessing is required. I really like my best friend, but she does not have a say in my decisions unless I ask for advice. Otherwise, I am an adult and do as I see fit.

Bottom line: if they do not respect you to live your life , tell them to take a hike.

I don't see this going well either. The one person who didn't support me was my Pastor's wife... If is important to be really firm and strong in what you are saying. Reality is you are not looking for their opinion. If you are unsure and scared I wouldn't let them know it. I feel this was a lifeline. They would never tell a diabetic not to take their medicine ... This is your medicine... It is hard work, better to struggle with your weight at a smaller size, than struggle larger and with the problems MO brings. Sometimes people think you are "Not that fat" but if you are getting it, you are obese. Pray before they come, and if you aren't ready cancel. Good Luck

I would not do that.  Would not want the stress on before my WLS. 

And if they are real friends - then you would not be worry about them being angry. 

True friends may not like our decisions - but they support us regardless. And respect our decision.If they won't support your decision- they were not real True friends. 

If their intentions is to show & discuss how they will support you, either a prayer b4 surgery or helping you grocery shop or help with errands after surgery, then that's great. However if they're coming over to convince you out of surgery then you'll have to stand your ground.

Friendships change, don't be afraid of that. If they're your friends they'll stand by you. They don't have to agree with your decision, but they should stand by you, if they don't, they might not really be your friends & you'll probably have to let them go. Your health is your priority, make sure they know that.

If they truly love you, they will be supportive.  Make sure you educate them about the process this way they understand its not easy.  If the friendship changes, then that's on them. You will find support in the most suprising places...i promise.

They didn't get to come over today because my pastor hurt his back this morning. 

Now that I've thought about it, read your responses and talked to another friend, I think my pastor and his wife will probably not necessarily agree with my decision, but will still be supportive and remain friends with me. There was a situation awhile back in which we didn't agree, but they're still my friends. However, I think I will wait until I go for my seminar on Dec. 9, or after I go for my consultation.

Maybe you could wait until you have been approved.  Just a thought.. save you some potential grief and less time for them to get on your head.  

The decision for WLS is yours alone. Pursue the best option for your health and your life.