I Should've Kept My Mouth Shut

I think the funniest comment she made was "you're not fat like those other fat people."  I asked who are "those other fat people?"  She said, the people who are obese.  At that moment I knew I was talking to an idiot.

Haha!

My older sister died 6 years ago she was over 400 pounds. The weigh tour her body up she could not loose. On her death bed she made her two very obease daughters my nieces to promise her they would loose weigh. Both of my nieces had weigh loss surgery 3 years ago both loosing well over 100 pounds. Three years later their weigh is still gone. This is the choice of life over death anyone who can't understand that is not worth talking to

I'm so sorry for your loss. It's great that your nieces have kept their weight off.

When someone says - I know someone that died or had complications from surgery.  My come back is always-  How many people do you know that died or had complications from obesity. 

so very true

People love to toss out the "I know someone who died". Of course people have died after having WLS surgery. It's often performed on people who are SMO and have quite a few comorbidities. It's still a lower number than you might think.

For this you simply have to press for details. Who died? Who was their surgeon and what procedure did they have? What was their weight? Was their death a direct result of the surgery or was it from another condition they also suffered? Usually that first one throws them because they have "heard" of a friends cousin's aunt's stepson who died.

How many patients that haved died on them is a question your surgeon shouldn't mind answering. Good surgeons don't care to have a high number. Like baseball players they value stats. :-)  Who wants a surgeon who has people dying all the time?

Women still die in childbirth right here in the USA. Would her advice be no children because women die in childbirth? People die at the dentist. Would she stop you from having your impacted wisdom tooth removed? Chemotherapy is poisoning your cells to get to the cancer cells. Woud she advise against that treatment? Have any surgery that they sedate your for and you run a risk of not waking up. It's a given.

You cannot educate everyone and it is not worth trying. You are being treated for a disease. Hold your head up and naysayers be damned.

And you will hear it here a lot as far as the easy way out...do you take your clothes to the river to wash? Cook over an open fire? Walk everywhere you go? Use an outhouse and bath in a washtub? No. So a lot of us are taking the easy way out everyday.

What kind of dumbass would continue to take the hard way?? It is the easiest way I have ever lost weight. You can't help it not for the first few months anyway. But relearning how to eat from scratch? Finding the strength to give up your triggers? No, not easy.

I am sorry that you are going through this with a so called friend. But you made the decision to do it. And it is yours not anyone else's. Stay strong. 

I would simply tell them STFU, butt out, this is none of your business...but I'm not known for my politeness.

You could smile sweetly while you say it maybe?

If diet and exercise worked long term..there'd be no need for us to resort to WLS.

I know this easier said than done but DO NOT let any one make you feel bad your decision or yourself.  Who is she to judge you or your efforts.  You alone are the judge of that.  I am sure you are a wonderful person and she is threatened by the idea of a thinner new you.  I have dealt with this and to these people I goodbye....I don't need them in my life.