Pitbulls, squirrels and infinite sadness.

My wife recently hit me with a "wonderful" surprize. She, and my daughter finally found a sweater for the family dog, and now he was able to come on my daily walks. My dog is about 75 pounds of pure muscle, so the option of a leash is not available as he literally will choke himself. So, we walk through the forest together, him running everywhere and me trying to walk. He has a "thing" for squirrels, well, dead squirrels actually. He tries to catch them as they simply climb about 5 feet up any tree and they're fine. I walk through a silent forest, as squirrels throw pine cones at my pitbull.

I feel so different from everyone around me now, I eat totally different food than them. I feel so "fragile" now. I am seeing the pounds fly off of me, I am also seeing muscle disappear too. I never get hungry anymore. Seeing people gorge themselves with food on every show, commercial, and outing is getting to me.

Oh yeah....that, and my doctor just informed me I'm in acute chronic kidney failure.

And all I can think about is how beautiful my dog looks as he is chasing squirrels.

It's not fun anymore....

Man, I'm sorry you're going through some tough times right now.

I have to be honest, acute chronic kidney failure sounds pretty awful. I'm sorry for being naive, but does that mean you need a kidney transplant? Or is this a condition you can manage long term? Sorry if these questions are too personal, feel free not to answer.

Watching people eat the foods I love is so hard. My work had potluck the other night and also Halloween candy everywhere. And why am I torturing myself watching food shows anyway? It's not easy to stand strong against temptation.

You are very right, it's not fun. It's work, and some days to me it feels like a full time job.

For me, I hold out for small pleasures. I walk everyday and set small goals for myself. A little further each day and I'm feeling much better physically then when I first started. How about you? I also really enjoy talking with others about their weight loss journey. We all have our own stuggles but I think we all have something in common too. The dream of a better, healthier life.

You sound so defeated right now, I hope you're taking care of yourself and getting the support you need.

Thank you for the kind words and for the concern also. I will need a new kidney soon, but while I wait, I will be on dialysis daily.

I have a great support network, it was just one of those things that happen (my kidneys) and I'm getting good treatment.

I don't know if my post really had a point, but I just needed to vent.

Oh boy that's tough news to get at any point, but must be particularly hard when you're already trying to create a new life for yourself. I have no words of wisdom, but I'm sending you all the positive energy I can muster for you at this moment.

Thank you.

We are so sorry to hear all you are going through. If I may ask is it surgery related? What did your surgeon say, what are they going to do for you?

Keep asking questions until you find the right doctor with answers!

Stay in touch! Good Luck!

Regards,

Kathy

Member Services

Yes, it happened as a result of my surgery on Aug.24.

I was aware of the risks going in so I guess I can't blame anyone but me.

I knew that I was feeling too good, something was bound to happen to challenge my happiness.

My family and I will get through this. Thank you also for the support you give to everyone.

My life has been 1 step forward and 3 steps back always. But I have to say I am still here and fighting and sounds like you are too Way to go

How is your kidney failure related to your weight loss surgery? Did you have kidney problems prior to your surgery?

I am so sorry. How discouraging. Is your kidney failure acute and chronic? Or just one of those? My father in law, who is in his 70's, recently was hospitalized for a few things--and he was experiencing acute kidney failure as well. They said he might recover from this, and he did, although he does need to be more wise in his self-care now.

If you need a transplant, it sounds like it is chronic. I hope you will be able to find a suitable kidney match for your transplant. One thought--perhaps you know of this kind of thing already--forgive me if I am saying too much: My husband has a work colleague *****cently had a kidney transplant. He did not have anyone in his family who was a good kidney match. However, through the kidney transplant network/database, they were able to have a family member donate a kidney, and then another kidney--a good match--donated by someone else--was available for the work colleague.

Take Care