Any kind of support will do

The statistics are pretty clear -- less than 5% of us can do this without surgery. We can lose weight, but we can't keep it off. I was originally going to do WLS self-pay in 2012. My husband was so against the idea that at one point, he accused me of "wasting all our savings on a cosmetic surgery." Health issues derailed that plan, but 3 years later I had insurance that actually covered surgery. By then my husband had come around so much that he had his surgery 2 weeks after mine, and we're down more than 300 combined pounds.

Sounds like the seminar scared him! No idea what changed my husband's mind after not being supportive of the idea but by the time I got to surgery he was supportive and since has been my greatest "cheerleader". I do think when I got to the point I said this was for me and no-one else it helped. Plus I pointed out all the things I had done for him over the years. Good luck and congratulations on taking care of you..som many of us women don't!

Maybe I should remind him that I bought him a Harley for his birthday. How soon he forgets.

My SO was opposed to my having WLS. I was determined to have it. I told him I was doing it for my health and my mind was made up. As time went by and he realized it was going to happen, and as he learned more about it, he "came around".

You are doing this because you need to do it - for your health. Stay true to your course. Your health will improve so much, and you will feel lke a new woman.

Congratulations -- stay strong!! I'm sure your husband will end up supporting your decision.

Mary

HE'S AFRAID. MOST MEN ARE WHEN THEIR WIFE ARE MAKING CHANGES EVEN IF BOTH WITH BENEFIT FROM IT. Women are so much more willing to support their husbands knowing that his getting healthier will benefit the while family.

Men, are fearful of losing their wives either literally,(afraid something will go wrong with operation) or because they will look better, or of not being the one their wife look to for support, or even because they have low self-esteem and notice their wives getting more confidence, that she will not need him anymore.

Even when my wife went back to school I was somewhat envious-don't know why because it would help us as a family but for some reason I thought I would be losing control.(as if I ever really had it) SO maybe it is a control thing, who knows, we men are whacked like that sometimes. But eventually I think he will come around and go along.

Believe it or not, right now HE needs the assurance and support that you will be there for him. I know that sounds crazy since you are making a major decision regarding your body and health but as men anything we cannot control or fix scares us. Perhaps you can let him read a few posts on this forum of those who have changed their lives and become better mothers, sisters, wives and daughters.

He has to understand that you are going to be a better you, and better for him. But you need to do this for you, that is something he is going to have to understand stand. He also needs to understand why he is so opposed to it? The risk/Reward is way in his favor and beneficial to him. He needs to support you on this and as you both work out and eat healthier together, hopefully it will strengthen your relationship as it did for both my wife and I. Hang in there!