Any kind of support will do

Hi everyone, I'm new to this so bare with me. I am just starting out on my journey and last night I went to the seminar. Now I'm just waiting on the call to get set up for my nutrition classes. What I really want to know is is there anybody out there who's husbands/wives are not supportive of this because my husband is the total opposite of a supportive husband. I am going through with this anyway but to have the support of a loved one (especially a spouse) would be great right now. He even went to the seminar with me last night just to tell me I don't need to do this because it's extreme. I'm pretty sure if my doctor didn't think I needed it she probably wouldn't have recommened it. Right? After years of failed diets and taking diet pills and exercising and more failed diets there's this tool that is available for me to use. So anyways, on our way home he says to me...again... that I don't need this and he will start working out with me and diet with me. ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!!!! After a few years of trying to get him to do that with me he finally wants to. I'm literally shaking my head. I told him if diets worked for me I wouldn't have went to the seminar and we wouldn't be fighting about this. I'm trying to explain to him that this isn't a quick fix this is a tool to help me learn how to eat again the right way. Like I said before I am getting this done with or without him supporting me. I'm not doing this for anyone else but me.

You will find plenty of support here. Welcome :) Your husband will come around I think. Just give him time and over all, educate him. :) Tell him more than what the seminars will tell him. What is your current weight/height, or BMI if I may ask?

I'm 5'3" at 240. I try to talk to him about this at it always ends up in a fight and me in tears. I'm not saying my husband is a terrible man, but he doesn't listen to me when I tell him that this is literally killing me. Oh well him of all people should know that when I get something in my head I'm going to do it. :)

Maybe he's just scared for you, and he's worried about the potential complications that could occur.

Maybe he's just an un-supportive **** . Only you can speak to that.

I'm wondering if he has weight issues of his own or not. It's hard for people who have never struggled with yo-yo dieting and every diet fad out there to understand that it's a vicious cycle and rarely achieves long term success.

Your BMI is over 40, you are morbidly obese. Your doctor obviously thinks you need assistance. If you don't achieve some form of permanent weight loss statistics say your health I likely to deteriorate over time. As you stated, this is your life and your health, and you are making the choice to take care of yourself. How could that be wrong?

Even if your husband doesn't come around you will find a lot of support and advice (hopefully mostly helpful) here on the forums.

Keep coming back. (Sorry, I ripped that off from AA but it's apropos)

I'm going to go with unsupportive husband for $500 Alex... He is a big muscular man and works as a mason. And he probably is scared that something is going to happen, but he should also be scared that if I continue to gain weight and be unhealthy he's going to have a lot more problems on his hands... Like for instance I'm ALMOST at the point that I can't wipe my own *** because of the fat that is accumulating on my sides. Yes, I have said this to him. No, I don't hold anything back. He said he would wipe it for me (which made me laugh) but it could also be very embarrassing. Why am I telling this to a complete stranger you ask? because it's the truth and I'm sure I'm not the only person to be going through this. And thank you for listening. It's just what I needed.

Your husband offered to wipe your butt for you? I might have to reconsider my previously held opinion of him. He might be a keeper after all.

But in all seriousness, I do hope he comes around it definitely helps to have a cheerleader in your corner.

What about other family members and friends? Are you talking with them about these choices?

They know me better than I do so of course they say that I don't need it (smh). It was funny that he said that I still laugh about it. I've always wanted an audience after I did my business.

Sorry I couldn't resist.

lol too funny. I still have a sense of humor.

My husband was very negative to this at first too, what it finally came down to is that he though I was doing this for him, he thought that I felt that he was embarrassed to be with me, he thought that if I went through with this that I would leave him. Once we sat down and discussed the truths, he became much more supportive. I am finally told him I am doing this for me! I'm doing this because I don't want to die young. I'm doing this because I have children and now a grandchild. I find the more you open the dialogue up and have him come to your appointments, kicking and screaming if you must, the more and more he will come around.