Really struggling....10 months 3 weeks post op

ive been grazing beyond my small 5-6 meals a day. The grazing has been more SUGAR n processed foods!!! I'm mad at myself and so close to goal. I haven't lose going on 3 weeks as I self sabotage. I just moved back home and assisting my elderly grandparents...very hard for me. I just don't want to go backwards!!! I haven't started my new job yet and I def think boredom around the house hurts me, stress of caring for my grandparents, and my fiancé being in Peace Corps is hurting me:/... Just asking for help overcoming the changes and slump in in..... No judging:).

You have come too far to give up now. You still have the tool. Use it. Document everything on MFP or some other app like it. A therapist might help especially with all of the stress that you are going through right. There will always be some kind of stress happening so this may give you more tools to deal with it.

Meal planning really helps... something about seeing what you are supposed to eat for the day in B&W on paper (or computer) that makes you more mindful when you have strayed from the plan. Eating on the fly usually equals way more calories than when you plan.

Be sure you are eating protein dense meals. Hard to snack when you are full from protein dense meal.

Drink water.

I am assuming the sugar/processed stuff in the house are your grandparents items... if they are yours... gather them up and give them away. Create a safe zone in your home. We are always going to have choices and temptations but they don't have to be under your nose. If they are your grandparents... are they things they should be having healthwise on a regular/easily accessible basis? Some pantry assessment/clean out time maybe would help.

Chat with a professional about stress, life changes and developing some healthy coping mechanisms.

Caregiving is stressful... there are some online groups for that that may have some suggestions.

Hope this list of 50 things to do instead of snacking helps a bit ;) I have it printed out on my fridge: http://theworldaccordingtoeggface.blogspot.com/2006/11/50-th ings-to-do-instead-of-snacking.html

Talking here helps... when you want to reach for a cookie or whatever... post about it... people will talk you down.

Try and avoid beating yourself up, guilt, regret... useless emotions and waste of energy... remember there is no finish line... the day after you reach a goal # on a scale nothing changes. Aim for the healthiest choices you can make each day... learn from a not so great choice and create a plan for next time :)

Best to you, ~Shelly

You haven't lost any in 3 weeks - OK - you haven't gained much either. That is a good thing and you are determined to get back on track. Your determination is even better. Everything that the other posters write is spot on.

Tomorrow is my 10 month anniversary, so I am close to you timewise. Several things have changed in your life and you need a new plan. You are experiencing big changes and you will figure out what will work in your new cir****tances.

You said you moved - are you still going to support group meetings at you old office, or have you found a new one. Many bariatric doctors have open support grp meetings - google for your new area and just call around. (I have attended an other when I traveled, they even let me weigh-in, and it was helpful.)

I want to say (confess) that I did 2 stupid (I thought they wouldn't cause a problem, but they did) things over the past two weeks. My NUT says to recover at the next meal, not wait until the next day. This has helped me not have such a big hole to climb out of. I also think that having the surgery made it more important that I get back on track and while not easier, I knew that I had more at stake than before surgery. It seems like you have that mindset also.

A few months ago, after reading about people struggling at about the 1-2 year mark, I wrote a plan for what I would do if I ran into trouble. I paste it here in case there are some ideas that might help. (Also, when my mother, who did not have surgery but had weight challenges, took care of my grandmother, she got a walk in everyday - it was important to her sanity. Although you are taking care of people, time for yourself is important.

I wrote my plan on the day that I achieved a 101 pound loss from my highest weight, so I was feeling grateful and not sure if it would last, but committed to doing everything possible to prevent weight gain. Your plan would be different, but here is my baby-start.

What I have learned and commit to

The first year of weight loss is driven by genetics. Over time, the genes play less of a role and you environment (what I do) takes over. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZcUtdgt3fs

Long term success is about making peace with my body, my health, and food. I enjoy being active, feel happy when I look in the mirror AND feel good when I eat without feeling guilty.

GOAL - Have a healthy relationship with food and my body.

Statistically, at one year the average WLS result was 65% EBW lost, by 3 years, the mean has reduced to 55% EBW.

Make sure my goal of 165# is reasonable - that would be 68% EBW lost and kept off - that is better than average, so I may have to work for some of it, and I am prepared to revise this weight rather than be at war with my body long term. I will follow the surgery instructions and see where it takes me and them develop a target maintenance weight at the 1-3 year mark.

Rules to follow during the honeymoon phase:

Weigh only 1 per week

Avoid toxic calories

Continue weight training and activity

Follow the rules - vitamins, no drinking 1 hour after a meal, get 60-80gms of protein, adequate hydration, 4 hours between meals

I am enjoying the success of the post-surgery honeymoon phase, and will ride it as long as it lasts. All my research indicates that 2-3 years out "your body weight catches up to where your brain thinks you should be" (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Yx97Ul2OV4), and my environment, activities, eating and exercise will matter more. I want to be ready for the long-term and not panic if things slow down.

Long term commitments to myself - Contingency Plan

Food Journal and Avoid toxic calories

Maintain and Exercise program - insurance against weight regain

Go to 10 support group meeting per year

Return to surgeon or Mindful Eating Program with 5 pound weight regain

Read A pound of Cure

Thank you!!!!! I need a plan! N I found a support group and I'll call them back today. My job has a gym and once I start I will go; for now I'm bike riding a few times a week since I don't have extra $ for a gym without my job lol. I need to stay busy and track more. I need to enjoy my body by I have lost a ton of weight from my highest point!!!

I can tell you are on your way already.

Way to go!!!!!

What a great post and thank you for sharing. I really like the idea of writing a plan out for myself. I am just 4 weeks out but will definitely look to create something similar as I think that will be very helpful.

Get the crap out of your house and start planning out your meals. I used to hang a preop pic on the fridge and inside the pantry door.

When I noticed I was grazing I went strictly with 3 meals and planned those out every morning.

Boredom eating is the worst--I bet your new job will help keep your mind busy. Maybe there's some activities/groups/hobbies you could pick up to keep yourself occupied?