so, I am 9 weeks post op. I have lost 47 lbs. great right? Well of course I have a ton more to loose. However when I see co workers I haven't seen every week. ( I do home care so we dont see each other daily) they say " Hey Skinny". Sounds great right? It's a compliment right? Well, I am far from skinny!!! They are much skinnier than me!!!! I want to be skinny! So it doesn't feel like a compliment. I know they mean well. They are great and very supportive. Why can't they just say. " you look great". ?

I am sure they did mean well.

I had the same kind of comments from people when I was losing rapidly. I felt it was just their way of saying "wow, you are losing lots of weight" ...but in a humorous fun way.

Of course it's a compliment. Now is the time to learn how to accept compliments graciously. You will be getting lots more of them. I find the strange looks without comment more uncomfortable.

I understand why you feel like you do, but do take compliments as they are intended. I agree with the previous poster -- I believe they mean well and are genuinely happy for you. Truthfully, unless one has been obese or had our experience, they can't possibly understand all the feelings that go with this journey.

Also, as you go down you will be amazed how many people will actually worry that you are losing too much or think you are too thin while you are still far from a normal BMI or weight. People are used to seeing you as obese and just as we have a hard time adjusting to our rapid change (body dysmorphia) -- so do other people.

It's really a crazy ride.

You are so right. There are already people saying I should stop losing before I get too thin. I'm still one pound from being overweight! What do you mean I should stop losing. Someone asked me last week how much more I wanted to lose. When I told her 45 pounds, she said, "No, you can't do that! You will be too thin". I didn't want to argue with her, but it pissed me off. She just kept saying, "No, no you can't do that".

Wow, it amazes me that they know more about me than I do.

I never, ever told people how much more I wanted to lose or "had" to lose. First of all, what a nosey and rude question!! Second - and I told everyone this - I will stop losing weight when my doctor tells me I'm done. Period. End of conversation. Next topic...

Boy do I understand that. Ive lost 50lbs since my surgery and some people will say "hey slim". I just hit under 300lbs...definitely not slim. I know they mean it to be encouraging but it comes across as feeling like poking fun or a backhanded compliment. I think that comes from the self preservation we all have from being a bigger person. Im hoping something will click with me mentally soon. Just wanted to let you know you're not alone.

Look at it this way-the are speaking a future truth in the present.

You are motivated!

You are doing well!

You are losing weight and it is NOTICEABLE!

You are clearly sticking to the plan since your are losing a significant amount of weight.

HENCE

You WILL BE SKINNY!

Hah--I know how you feel. I hate it when people comment on my weight (I've had 80+ weight loss in the past). As in, I have to put my professional/polite "customer service" face so people (hopefully) don't realize the reaction I'm having to their comment.

I'm weird about sharing my personal life though...I'm six days out from VSG and I was at Wal-Mart doing some shopping. I was able to meet my wife at Subway for lunch and she brought two friends--one of whom I'm fairly close to but neither knows about the surgery. One of them asked me why I wasn't eating with them and I said I'd already had a protein shake. She asked some more questions about my presumed protein-shake diet and all I could think about was that it wasn't her business, haha.

I probably need therapy--or I'm just an asshole :)