Advice

Gee, don't get so butt hurt     No one is judging you.  They are trying to help.  Many of these people have years of experience in a post weight loss surgery life.  It behooves you to listen to what they're trying to tell you.

I'm sure you think you're a very special snowflake and the laws of physics don't apply to you.  But it's really a simple formula.  If you eat more calories than you expend, you gain weight.  There are medical conditions that can affect the process to some degree.  

Weight loss surgery isn't a cure all.  If you don't change your eating habits post surgery, you will not maintain your weight loss.  If you refuse to evaluate them now, it would seem you're in some form of denial.  That's not uncommon.  Have you considered therapy?

A BMI of 31 is obese.  You are not wrong in considering a tool that will help you get to a normal weight.  Life is more enjoyable when you are not obese.

Some regrets depending on your surgery can be:

GERD, indigestion, constipation, lactose intolerance, dumping, nausea, flatulence, diarrhea, vitamin deficiencies, needing iron infusions, loose and flabby skin, needing plastic surgery. 

Many people have transfer addictions and replace food with sex, shopping, gambling, or alcohol.

You cannot eat much at one time, so a meal with friends becomes enjoying their company and watching them eat.

People often learn how to eat around their surgery and gain their weight back.

I did not think of myself as a foodie until I was not able to eat "normal" meals.  There are times when I have regretted my surgery.

Surgery isn't the right fit for those who cannot be honest with themselves. It is a daily commitment to making good choices. 

Bad **** can still happen, even to those who are compliant with post op eating. You have to ask yourself if it is worth it to you even if you have complications.

I treated my body and myself like **** for years. I finally decided it was time for surgical intervention, AND that I was ready to commit to making the necessary changes, one of which was to stop bull****ting myself about how I got obese. I was the problem. There was no magical external force or medical condition making me fat. 

I would tell anyone considering surgery to first strip away the artifice and magical thinking. Acknowledge that obesity is a problem you face, and decide what to do. 

It's okay if you feel judged and whine. That gets more page views for your comment and maybe someone who needs to read the wisdom shared here will get the information they need to start getting real.

Deb T.

Yes - Exactly! 

The Sleeve is a great surgery---IF the reason you're obese is simply that you eat too much of the wrong stuff. If food truly isn't your thing, then the Sleeve may not help you much at all. All the Sleeve will do is limit how much you can eat at one sitting, but it won't make you choose the best food, nor will it keep you from eating too many calories in a day. With a Sleeve, you *can* graze all day, if that's your choice.

Here's my suggestion---journal your food. Write down every single bite that passes your lips for a week. DON'T attempt to 'diet' during this time---just eat as you normally do, but write it all down. Use the various nutritional info sites and figure out exactly how many calories you're eating, AND break this down into how many grams of protein, fat, and carbs. This will give you a much better idea of why you're a chunky girl. (Contrary to popular belief, a calorie isn't just a calorie. Our bodies treat proteins, fats, and carbs differently, and it does matter where your calories come from.)

I am NOT telling you to not get a Sleeve. I KNOW that getting a Sleeve when I was in my early twenties and still a light-weight would have HELPED me---it wouldn't have been a long-term solution for my particular problem, but it most certainly would have given me several more years of being just moderately fat instead of MO/SMO/SSMO.

And no, you don't need anyone's permission to have this surgery, but you came here asking for advice. I don't think anyone's been too harsh with you---this is MAJOR surgery you're talking about. Any time you go under general anesthesia, there's a small but real chance you will not wake up. Everyone here wants you to have the best possible outcome, and *sometimes* the best thing to do is...just not have surgery.

Nearly 12 years ago, I chose to have the Big Dog Daddy of WLS---the Duodenal Switch. This was absolutely the best decision I've ever made. (I probably wouldn't be alive today without it.) But it has demanded that I make some major lifestyle changes, and if I stop living the way my WLS demands, I WILL die, and it won't be pretty. All we're saying is that YOU need to be aware of how you MUST change your habits post-WLS, and what will happen if you DON'T.