Early fall is the most confident season for the formerly fat - whose experimenting with a hotter...

Once you get to a certain age, you either own it and are forthright about it... or you lie and have it come back to bite you in the ass.

I don't understand why it's something to lie about in the first place. You've lived on the earth a certain number of years. It's something to be proud of. We've survived!

I've been married almost 27 years, I'm 47 years old, we have a 26 year old son, I was pregnant when we married. I wore a black dress because I liked it and I certainly wasn't fooling anyone into thinking I was a virgin. I tell the truth, even if it makes me unpopular, and I don't give a flying fart what anyone thinks of any outfits I wear. This is how I've been able to be happy.    I guess my mantra is, "Whatever, whatever. I do what I want."  Trying to impress other people with a constructed image rather than being authentic is a recipe for unhappiness, in my opinion.

If you're a weirdo, be a weirdo. That's what I do.

Thanks for your thoughtful responses Nic ! I'm definitely already a weirdo lol !

 I was just  talking with a male friend my age who has three kids about  dating and our differences.  He CANT lie on his online profile  because being his kids Dad nails him to a certain generation.

 I have put off having kids precisely so I can have a career first and my field is one that actually REQUIRES me to lie ( luckily they don't ask my age but just guess it- in order  to work i have to make them guess WRONG).  So yes I AM a weirdo already and already to a limited extend living like the Tv series "Younger "

I haven't seen the episode yet  where she comes clean with her 13 years younger boyfriend about her real age , but I'm sure its coming ...  

In my case  like hers I feel more comfortable with friends from my real generation ( and I have some older ones too) .  So whoever I date is gonna figure o ut I'm pretty " mature "  pretty quickly .  I don't plan to hide my friends unless they get catty or try to out me.. 

Its the combination of dating significantly younger and still having body issues from being formerly fat that is really scaring me .  maybe I need to get some long postponed/deferred  plastic surgery to get my confidence up especially regarding the bedroom .  

Therapy might be more useful in the long term than plastic surgery.

Already  do lots of that but thanks for the suggestion .((()))

I love it and agree 100%!  I have an AMAZING husband who is 6yrs older than me, he treats me like his princess and would do anything for me. He's not that Hunk some women want but he's got a great job, a wonderful personality that makes him a hunk and treats me and my two children GREAT, he is not their BIO Dad but he is a damn good man and loves my girls regardless.  Now talking about age, I'm 40 and my husband is 47 (he already had his birthday this yr) We've only been together for 9yrs, married for 8yrs but I couldn't emagine life without him. He takes care of us when we're sick, he shows his love for us daily and he loves our furry family members too.  There are really good men out there but sometimes folks seem to want those pretty boys, well guess what pretty doesn't always  cut it, not for men or women.  Beauty comes from within! 

  I just told my 12yr old daughter yesterday, when she came home crying because a couple of the kids didn't like her, " baby, you can't please everyone, and to be honest you're a pretty great kid so if someone doesn't like you, that sounds like their problem and their loss, don't try to be someone your not, just be the best you, you can be".  My baby went to school with her head held high today, because she just needed to be reminded how wonderful she is! I think in life folks forget how special they are and just need a little reminder.   

Thanks Boxtop!  My ex husband was my age but I wasn't physically attracted to him at all.  I figured that like an arranged marriage I would come to love him because he treated me well - but then he didn't so there wasn't much of a bond there .

Maybe I'm weird for being repelled by the ravages old age - but its kind of a society-wide thing .  I do think a lot of aging is an avoidable disease - some people particularly vegetarians ( for example Jared Leto) are gorgeous and young looking into their forties .  THAT wouldn't bother me. 

The weird thing is the older I get the more I only want to date young . I really didn't value "callow young men" as a youngster  myself ( and I was afraid they'd judge me for being fat of course ) .. now I'm in my second childhood 

Aging is an avoidable disease? Good luck with that.

What wonderful advice! 

I'm confused. Why don't you put your real age in your profile and then just explain that you are attracted to younger men and won't respond to anyone over the age of ....? That way you are honest and men who are not turned off by older women will respond. After all, just like you don't find older men attractive, the same applies for men. Why would you lead them on? Make sure the pictures in your profile are recent so men can see how "young" you look.  Why are you making this so difficult and dishonest?

My pictures ARE totally recent and unposed . Like a headshot.. there's no point to advertising salmon and then showing up as tuna ... I actually look way better than that . I suppose i could say i like younger men... that idea never occurred to me ( thanks !) In a way saying that already  implies i'm not really probably 23 lol...

See I knew you guys would come with something cleverer than I could !  TY