Hi, my name is Willie and I'm a food addict

Hey guys, my one year Surgiversary (SP?) is tomorrow August 26, and I meet with my surgeon!  I thought I would be down 100 lbs and believe me I tried the last couple of weeks or so but I've stuck at 97lbs and have been for awhile. I even had to fast two different days because of blood tests and an ultrasound but the scale hasn't moved. Am I upset? Nah, I am very happy with my weight loss up to now and it's accompanying benefits. Have I been strict in my protocol? No. Have I been firm?  I will say yes, at first but admittedly then I kind of lax off . So therein lies the reason why my weight loss has slowed. I'm a food addict. I take accountability for it, won't use it as an excuse but as motivation. To know your enemy is to restrain and defeat your enemy.

The tool has been wonderful and has done it's job. My mindset though, has relaxed. The enthusiasm and eagarness I once had when first losing weight has waned somewhat, at times. I'm 25-40 lbs away from goal and it's not as much the weight I'm concerned about as it is my mindset. It's almost like being a dry alcoholic. Manifesting the symptons, behavior and personaity of an alcoholic but with out the drink. Yet an alcoholic is ALWAYS an alcoholic. When he forgets that-he gives in and destroys his life. Although I don't eat as much physically now as I used to to I have noticed that my relationship with food has resurfaced-matter of fact it it wasn't for this tool and my love of exercise I would have probably gained a lot of weight back! But as I've heard on this forum SO MANY times "you cannot out train a bad diet!" We can't fool ourselves! Even with the tool, the weight loss and it's benefits, I am still a food addict! Is it hopeless? Of course not, I'm accountable for my addiction, and I have the ability to get it manageable.

 Wow, this really is a journey. A lot of self-examination, taking accountability and just not giving up. Your counsel, suggestions, constructive criticism on this forum have been mint! This really helps me to respect EVEN more those who have kept the weight off for 2,3,5 even 10 years! I realize the first year is actually the EASY part-almost automatic. The hard part comes later when WE become the tool!  

I know what I need to do! Get back on the horse-eat protein, chew slowly, drink fluids-but not with meals, and  reassess my relationship with food! Also be active and proactive, and come to theses boards more often. A little disappointed in myself but not going to beat myself up-I'm doing ok! I'm down 97 lbs!

Look, I love where I am right now. Could I have done better? Probably, yes, of course I could have, especially from a mindset point of view.  The positive is that I've always GAINED weight and become lax during the summer. I know this is opposite from most people but in the Summer I've always been unrestrained, an automatic eater, completely off grid-soda, beer, chips, candy, shakes, ice cream, barbecue, picnics, family reunions, etc-exercise only golf. Where as Fall and Winter I'm more scheduled, organized,  planning of a diet, going to gym religiously like a social club. This Summer I've done ok, no weight gain, but also no loss. Yet, no out of controlled eating. I've walked. Played golf. Annd now I look forward to the Autumn.  The key is not to dwell on the negative but to learn from it and use my Surgiversary and meeting with my surgeon tomorrow whom I'm sure will discuss with me things I could have done better or need to do.

So to those veterans out there I just want to say thank you! And also to you new ones that remind me where I was also-gotta know where you been to know here you going right? This tool is great but still the biggest tool is our mindset and motivation to stick to the plan we put out before us. My goal was and still is to lose 140 lbs in two years. So now I have a year to lose 43 lbs, which is very doable and then maintain by LIVING healthy.

So why am I writing? Because I NEED To, it's part of my health therapy! I'm a food addict and need my support from those who have been there also. And I know I'll get feedback that will help me continue this journey.  I look forward to my second year and thereafter in this never ending, yet joyful quest for good health! Hi, my name is Willie, and I'm a food addict.

HI WILLIE! 

Couldn't resist.

I think the most important the away from what you said us that you understand you didn't give it 100% the whole year and you're taking personal accountability to get yourself back on track! 

Congrats on your 97 lbs#

First of all, congratulations on all your success!  Not just losing weight, but coming to terms with your food addiction.  I admire your ability to share that with all of us too.  I hazard to say, that most of us are just like you.  It is not easy to face the fact that we have thought of food as something outside ourselves to "help" us somehow.  You have taken another great step by posting here and reaching out.  I am positive we will hear more success posts from you in the future. Hi, my name is Nikkie, and I too, am a food addict.

Willie, You are going to be successful because you recognize your responsibility and are willing to do the work.  Staying on this site to keep yourself accountable is a great idea!  Love your posts!   

Best wishes!

Hi, Willie... my name's Corrie and I'm a food Addict.  Just wanted you to know I enjoyed reading your post and love your healthy attitude. Forty-three pounds in one year... yep... you got, this!!!  

Thanks for sharing - I, too find writing and posting to be very therapeutic and reading everything from newbies to vets helps keep me on track.  Keep rockin' it!

Hi Willie...my name is Kim and I too am a food addict.  It is cathartic to write out for everyone to see your struggles.  I respect that.  It also helps me keep motivated and take each day one day at a time and realize the gift I have been given.  All the very best to you and thanks for sharing.

Kim

Boy, does your post ring a bell with me.  I think I'll always be a food addict, working towards recovery.

The hard part is when the initial dedication and motivation wan.  I'm stuck at a number and I can't seem to go to the next level.  Whose fault is it?  Mine, of course.  I'm not eating cookies and ice cream, but I am letting my head hunger get the best of me.  The weekends are the hardest.  When I introduced wine back into my life, I saw a distinct difference in my weight loss.  And I don't drink wine all the time - maybe once a month at this point.  It's the constant need to shovel food into my mouth that is hard to overcome.

I do have a great deal of respect for those who have reached their goal and kept the weight off for extended periods of time.  We are so new to this that we can't possibly fathom what the future will hold.  The vets have been in the trenches and are here to help.  That's why I'm so annoyed when people attack vets who have been there, done that, and don't want to listen to them.  It's a very childish mindset, if you ask me.

So I applaud your self-analysis and honesty in where you are at in this process.  You are not alone.  Thanks for sharing  

It took totally failing with WLS for me to finally figure out that WLS is NOT a cure for compulsive overeating.

After my first surgery I lost weight no matter what I ate.  For the first 2 years anyway.  Almost like clockwork, as soon as I passed my two year mark I started gaining.

I remember thinking that I wasn't a compulsive overeating anymore because I was thin.  I sure figured that out in a hurry.  I was, am and always will be a compulsive overeater, food addict or whatever term you want to use.

Having finally accepted this cold hard truth I have been able to use this surgery in the way is was intended, as a tool to help me eat less and make better choices.  I do the hard work but the tool helps me be able to do that.

You are lucky that you have accepted that before you had regain or even went under the knife for a revision, convincing yourself that the problem wasn't you but that you had the wrong surgery.

There are times when the surgery fails or it isn't the right surgery for the person but most of the times I have seen people *****gain a lot of weight the reason is bad food choices.  We aren't special.  Most of us don't maintain our obesity or gain weight while eating around 1200 calories a day, although I remember being in denial before my revision, sure I didn't really eat THAT much.  When I tool a cold hard look at how I really was eating I was surprised that I didn't gain more then the 100 lbs I did gain.

Good luck to you, acknowledging the problem is the first step in addressing the solution and it sounds like you, and the others who have chimed in, have a firm grasp on the reality of the problem.

Hi Willie

My name is Kathy and I am a food addict!  Congratulations on your 97 pounds gone

Hi Willie

My name is Debbie and I'm a food addict.  I really appreciate you taking the time to post this. It helps to hear others have the same struggles.