Have you told your family and friends about your decision to have WLS or do you keep it a...

SHH…IT’S A SECRET

To Tell Or Not To Tell

I am a full disclosure type of person.  For me the more people that are aware in my family, the easier it is for them to understand why I am not eating like I once did.  When I first was approved for my surgery I assumed that I would want to keep it to myself, but upon further reflection decided it would benefit me to just be open about it.  I don't have to worry about offending anyone when I turn down their desert or fried goodness.  I understand that I may be up against a lot of negative opinions, but that is why I have a therapist and great support group.  I personally feel like you sabotage yourself when you have to continuously come up with reasons you refuse to eat certain things or why you are eating such small portions.  Just be honest.  What good do you get out of not telling?  It is nothing to be ashamed of.  Instead of waving your white flag and being obese, you put your life at risk to obtain a tool to get back on track. 

I'm pre-op, but have told several people that I am considering surgery - Family, friends, and one work friend. So far I have received positive responses. I look at it like any other life event. There are some things I share with some people, and other things I would shout from the roof top! I look at it like... who would I tell if I starting dating someone vs. who would I tell if I got engaged. I put surgery at the "new girlfriend" level of sharing. Not everyone needs to know, but I would excitedly tell my friends.

I am gay and just came out two years ago (I am 32). I know what it feels like to hold secrets inside. I promised myself I would never hide again. Of course, there is such a thing as over sharing. When I was first coming out, I wanted to tell EVERYONE! I promise you that the bank teller doesn't care about your RNY! As with all things in life, it is about balance.

I am choosing not to tell my family.  I've lost a lot of weight before and they weren't supportive.  They just found other things to pick at.  Also, I've been a runner for years and they don't understand nor support my efforts.  I've told a handful of friends.  I'll deal with any other issues after it's done.

I tell people and because of it have a large support group who are understanding that some of my needs are a little different, and are understanding when I have frustration or emotions a little out of my norm. 

I was very open about it...the truth is so much easier to keep track of. 

One thing to keep in mind at work though, that lying can be professional suicide in the workplace.  If the truth comes out, you'll likely be labeled a liar - even if its none of their business.

In the beginning, I kept it to myself. I wasn't sure I was going to do this or not. I went to the orientation and at the end of it, I set up my appt. with the surgeon. A couple of days later, I decided to tell my dad and best friend. They are my biggest supporters and if I can't rely on them for support, then who can I rely on. I guess I was worried that they wouldn't want me to go thru with it or that they would look down on me for doing it. I was wrong tho. My dad went with me to all my pre op appts, was 100% supportive and told me how proud he was of me and how much he loved me. He's been right beside me all the way. So has my friend, via phone. She lives in KS., but we talk everyday and she too is proud of me. And she says, a little jealous too. lol I feel very blessed to have them in my life and on my side. The only thing I wonder about is if my mom would have approved of what I did. She passed away the end of 2013 and will never have the chance to see me when I reach my goal weight.

I tell everyone who will listen, especially people who would benefit from the surgery. I made up my mind this is what I am doing and my family and friends can live with it whether they approve or not. Thankfully they were all very supportive.

I told my closest family and friends.  A handful if people I can turn to for support if needed. My plan is to tell other people if they ask me directly - I am not going to lie nor shade the truth.  But I am just not going to offer the information unprompted.