Pre-surgery worries

Good luck with your surgery and congrats on taking control of your life at such a young age. I had mine 14 yrs ago and have never looked back. It's amazing, it's life changing and you'll feel and look so much better. Your self confidence will go through the roof and you'll be able to be more active. If your family is unaccepting and you can't change their minds, then stay away from them. If you do want to confront them just say "my doctor and I decided that this surgery was the best decision for my health" if they don't like it too bad. When you run into them and they make a remark about the weight loss look them straight in the eye and say "I had weight loss surgery to better my health, I'm doing great - thanks for asking". You don't need their permission or acceptance. People who are ignorant make fun of what they don't understand or couldn't do on their own. It's a defense mechanism. Don't let it get to you, don't lie, proudly say you've taken charge of your life and if they'ld like to educate themselves about the procedure and aftercare, you'ld be more than happy to help. Good luck.

Jen 20001 RNY

You'll not be able to avoid them noticing.  The question is whether or not you want to maintain an outright lie, which I don't ever support.  It's too hard to keep up with.  What I would do is keep quiet about it until after surgery, then when there's nothing else they can do to convince you otherwise - then fess up.  When they ask you why you kept it from them, you answer honestly, based on comments made about others.  It may teach them some sensitivity, but it prolly won't do more than offer a lesson that yeah, you pay attention to their negativity.

Now is the time to hold your head high and find your own success without their approval.  What I found from my own family is that when I lost all of my weight, they would try to find other things to criticize.  Its important to stand in your own self now.

Not standing up to your dominating, yelling Dad is probably one of your weight issues.march in and tell him" Dad, im having weight loss surgery for me for my health. It's not open for discussion. I would love your support but I won't tolerate any negative comments." Even if he gets mad and yells you will feel better.  Trust me. I don't sit quietly and take **** anymore.  I think that's why I had weight issues. Goid luck.