Having a hard time at work, need some advice.

I am very  strict on my diet. I have up days and down days.  Some days I can't eat anything and have a hard time eating anything,  so whatever stays down is what I eat.  If that means I'm eating a couple things that aren't 100% perfect, too bad.  That doesn't mean I'm eating fast food. .. The worst thing I've snuck so far is a Rolo. One rolo.  Sorry I'd rather have a piece of toast than nothing at all.  My Co workers gave me an "intervention" the other day and told me I needed to change what I was eating and how they think I'm going back to my old habits.  They even said they know i don't eat what I'm supposed to at home because my face broke out.  (I'm 23, my face has been breaking out since I was 13 no matter what I eat.)  I work at a bank.  I get two "breaks" a day.  Which are mostly alone.  I don't appreciate being told that I'm failing,  especially when I KNOW I'm succeeding. I'm trying so so so so hard, but having to stick up for myself and being told "well it was your choice deal with it" when I'm having a very bad and emotional day is heartbreaking and makes me feel defeated. they know this upsets me because I get very emotional and defensive (I've worked insanely hard to get where I am. ) any advice or moral/emotional support? 

Tell them you don't want their advice and feel it's inappropriate and unprofessional.  If you want, tell them you are working with your doctor,  a dietician, whatever.  Or just tell them you don't want to take medical advice from bankers.

Why in the world are your co-workers discussing your personal life in such an intimate manner? That is incredibly inappropriate and if I were you, I would inform them that any further comments on the subject will be handled by human resources.

How dare they publicly dissect your eating habits. The fact that they think this is ok is completely baffling to me.

I agree! HE isn't so helpful... last time I had an issue here and called them the only thing she had to say to me was "stop crying"

HR***

This is a great example of why some people choose to keep details of their WLS private!

Seriously, I've found that in many situations where words fail, the best response is, "I can't believe you would say that."

Put it right back on them.

And then be direct. "This is not something I am going to discuss with you any further."

And maybe think about polishing up that resume...

Don't worry I've been looking elsewhere :) Thank you,  maybe I'll say that next time. 

Kate,

I am impressed that you were courageous and had the surgery at 23.  (I had it much later in life).  Congrats on your weight loss to date.   With or without surgery 54 pounds lost is a great achievement.  

It seems that you are having trouble on multiple fronts.

1. Do you have a daily food plan that gets you the protein that you need and stays down?  If not, have you gone back to your surgeon?  I still use a shake to get my daily protein.   I use Trader Joe's in a can- 35 g protein, 170 calories, pre-mixed so it does not change in consistency.  I don't know how you are coping given your eating difficulties.

  2. Your co-workers, whatever their motivation, seem like a pretty poor support group.   I thought the suggestion to have HR handle their future 'interventions' is a first step in getting them out of your business.  How is your support system outside of work?   Many doctor's have monthly support group meetings - there you can get knowledgeable help.  

Hang in there.  I hope it gets easier for you.

Thank you so much :)

To answer your questions,  yes I do keep track of my food.  I started drinking the protein shakes again because I seem to have no appetite what so ever,  but I do make myself eat every 3-4 hours,  but I don't always enjoy it and it sometimes makes me feel very sick. 

My support system outside of work is amazing.  My mom had lap band surgery 13 years ago and lost 220 pounds so she's always right by my side,  and my boyfriend is very positive and always is there for me.  I cannot attend the meetings anymore,  my health insurance changed and doesn't cover it.  :(

I have friends who work at banks and I realize they can be very small environments where everyone sees what you are doing. Maybe they really are concerned. You don't say which surgery you had or how far out you are, but it is common in the beginning especially to have some days where it is just harder to eat. That doesn't mean abandoning protein first. Greek Yogurt or cottage cheese can be easier to get down and have protein. Protein shakes work. An occasional piece of toast isn't going to kill you but if you are having that and not your protein, it can cause problems. Maybe not at that moment, but in the long run. This is a journey and a learning experience. I feel for me it is about learning new habits so that when my honeymoon is over, I will be able to keep the weight off. I would assume the best and thank them for their concern.