So many questions....

Hi everyone:  I love how active this forum is!  Lots and lots of good information.  I have done 3 of my 6 pre-surgery (currently planning on RNY) meetings with the dietician.  I think they are relatively informative.  The dietician is VERY good at letting me know how I am NOT eating properly.  I have to lose about 100 lbs.  That seems like such a big number!  As I am sure many of  you have experienced, I have lost and gained more weight than I thought possible.  I want to take this weight off and keep it off.  I have so many questions regarding this process and I am hopeful some of you could share your experiences with me.  As of right now, the things that scare me most are as follows.

1.  I am a lover of food.  I love to cook. I love to eat. I  love to entertain. I love everything about it. Will I ever be able to eat normally again.  I know I need portion control and to work on getting my protein in but do you get to go out to dinner? Cook? Dinner parties?

2.  How about wine...I love great wine.    Do any of you still enjoy wine? I can assure you that my dietician is not a fan of wine. 

3.  What about the "no fluids 30 minutes before and 60 minutes after you eat?  Is that hard?  Does it get easier?

4.  My last concern right now is carbonated beverages.  I don't drink soda--diet or regular.  I love sparkling water though.  Will that always be taboo? 

I am sure these seem like petty questions but any constructive feedback would be so much appreciated. 

Thanks in advance!!!

I am banded not bypassed so my exoerience doesn't really help you! But just chiming in to say that all of these were questions I had pre-op but then I realised that a love of eating, cooking and a love of wine were major reasons why I was obese!

i now socialise totally "normally".  But normally now means small quantities of high-quality food accompanied by small quantities of high quality wine (banded oeople can drink with meals!). Food is important to me and my social life but it is no longer central to it. In fact, I can socialise without food at all! Which is why I now wear size 10 clothes instead of size 22. 

Edited for typos

1. You can still eat, you just need to learn what you SHOULD eat. For example, when my husband and I go to Chili's, I order fajitas with no tortillas, and box up 2/3 of the meat to bring home with me. Most of us find that our lives no longer center around food the way they used to.
   
   
2. After surgery, your tolerance reduces greatly and you'll find that it hits you much harder. Alcohol provides empty calories that we should avoid anyway. Most surgeons recommend skipping alcohol entirely for a long period post-op.
   
   
3. The "no fluids" rule is more or less permanent, though some folks don't have to wait quite as long. I'm fine with 10 minutes before and 20 - 30 minutes after. Your pouch/sleeve won't have room for liquids, and you don't want to wash all of the food out of your stomach and become hungry again immediately.
   
   
4. Carbonated beverages can cause gas, some stomachs can handle it while others have to avoid it entirely. My surgeon gave me the go-ahead on diet Coke and seltzer water as long as I let it go half-flat, since it doesn't bother my sleeve as much as some others' seem to. Ask your doctor for his/her directions.

What was already said is solid information. I'm just adding my experience to give you a wider perspective.

1. You will be able to eat normally, yes. But your normal is going to change from what it used to be. And if you're taking the step to get this surgery, you WANT it to change. You'll be ordering smaller portions, or customizing meals, and definitely bringing home leftovers. You will just learn that your entertaining will be more feeding and preparing for other people, and not eating it yourself.

2. I am five months out and had my first glass of wine this week (for new years) and it was kind of hard to drink. I loved wine before, but I don't see myself having it regularly now. It's drinking empty calories and I'm not trying to "be happy" by what I eat or drink any more, I'm trying to be healthy- you know? So, you'll have to see what you can handle. And it won't be right after, give yourself some time.

3. I don't have trouble with the not drinking 30 minutes before or after eating. I have to be very mindful of it, but it's not too difficult. If I am at a restaurant I tell them no water. They're always perplexed by this, but if it's there I will try to drink it. So I just tell them to not bring me anything.

4. Carbonation is mostly said to be a no-no. I know some doctors are okay with non-caffeinated, no-calorie drinks (like sparkling water) once a little flat, but I'm just staying away from them because I don't want to go back to my old ways. Even if they weren't caloric and super bad. I'm just trying to make a life-change and not do/eat/drink things because I liked them "before."

Good luck!

It's important to remember that if you keep doing what you've always done, you'll keep getting what you've always gotten.  Your relationship with food will need to change if you want to be successful.  

That said, I'm a foodie and I chose the VSG because of that.  I've been very happy.  I still go out to eat occasionally (I've never been big on eating out, since I'm also a food snob).  I still have dinner with friends.  But I eat very small portions that are mainly protein and focus on the social aspects instead of the food aspects.  I also eat very slowly.  This has been working really well for me.  And I still enjoy cooking just as much as I always have, I just don't cook a lot of carbs anymore.  

Define "eating normally."  If you mean eating exactly how you are now, the answer is decidedly NO.

I'm a foodie.   I love food and the social occasions that surround it. But I've found that my attitude has changed a great deal since surgery.  I no longer eat out seven nights a week.   I prefer cooking fresh healthy food for myself. I think about food more now than I ever did prior to surgery.  I plan meals and always make sure I have healthy choices available.  If I'm planning to eat out, I'll often see if the restaurant has their menu online so I can think about what I'll order. There's always something I can find to eat that meets my goal of dense quality protein and limited carbs.

I had my first full glass of wine ONE YEAR post surgery.  It's empty calories and I still have a lot of weight to lose. Even when I reach goal I doubt that I'll drink wine in the volume or frequency pre surgery. 

I drink fluids up until the time I eat.  I don't drink again until one hour after I finish eating.  It works best for me.

I specifically asked my surgeon about carbonated beverages several months post surgery.  He does not recommend them right after surgery.  He says they will not stretch your sleeve - that's a myth. But many patients have bloating and gas from carbonation that doctors will advise against them.  He said if I can tolerate them, then go for it.  I don't drink diet soda, but carbonated water like San Pellegrino.  I waited until nine months after surgery to introduce them. 

One of the reasons why I chose VSG over RNY is because I am a foodie and didn't want the risk of dumping that RNY can have.  I can eat anything,  but choose to avoid or limit certain foods.  I'm very happy with my decision. 

And finally,  I find that my obsession with food has changed.  Not disappeared,  but it's not all encompassing as it once was.  When my foodie friends talk about the restaurants they've been to recently,  I find that I just don't care.  I look at myself and the changes to my body and wouldn't trade it for anything. I can still eat well but in moderation. 

Good luck on your journey.  I think you might find a different relationship with food down the road.

1.  That depends on what "eating normally"  means to you.  Will you ever be able to eat the way you did pre-op?  Nope.  Certainly not if you want to maintain your weight loss, but I could not eat like I used to now even if I tried.  It would be physically iimpossible for me.  But I go out to dinner, sure.  I cook.  I don't have dinner parties, but I could if I wanted to.  I just eat mostly healthy things in small amounts.

2.  I have an occasional glass of wine.  Not often.

3.  There is no reason not to drink for 30 minutes prior to eating.  Liquids don't stay in your pouch, which is why they recommend not drinking with or right after meals - it would wash the food out of the pouch and you'd be hungry again right away.  I drink right up until I start to eat.  I wait about half an hour after eating to drink again.

4.  There is no reason for carbonated drinks to be taboo.

Things will change as everyone has said, but it doesn't mean you are doomed to a life of no fun or socializing. The not drinking with meals wasn't hard at all. I drink up until my meal if I want to and wait 30-60 min. after. I can't tolerate most carbonated beverages at this point, I've tried but makes me very uncomfortable. That may change. I love to cook, I love to entertain as well. It hasn't slowed me down a bit. I had a BBQ for about 80-100 people in my backyard 3 weeks after surgery. I made sure I had a Shrimp ****tail platter, so I ate a few of those, but I was busy cooking, preparing and visiting I wasn't worried about not eating. Went to 3 weddings and my brother's 60th birthday the first 6 weeks after surgery. It can be fun without eating tons. A taste can satisfy. I was worried about these things before surgery as well. not as big of issues as I thought.

Hi

i had many of the same questions.  I am almost three years out and maintaining for the past two.

1) You will be able to socialize, cook and entertain.  You will just eat much smaller quantities (and hopefully most of the time make good choices).  

2) was not a drinker before or after so can't address

3) I drink right up to eating because when you have an empty stomach liquids go right through.  I wait at least 1/2 after eating to drink.  If I eat dense protien it is frequently longer because I feel full and tgat drinking would not be comfortable.  It's only annoying sometimes when out to eat and what to get a coffee post dinner.  I just wait until home or order one and take it to go.

4) my doctor does not have an issue with carbonation.  I think the real reason people are advised against drinking it is lifestyle and returning to bad habits - not that the bubbles will damage the stomach.  I was never a big soda drinker but occasionally will drink a diet come or seltzer.  It does not bother my sleeved stomach.

good luck

Lots of good answers. I had RYN 5 months ago and am still proceeding very slowly. There are times that I miss being able to get take out or eat as I used to when out with friends but then, I remind myself of how unhappy I was being so overweight. I would be careful with wine. I am biased though as I have had two close friends develop a cross addiction to alcoholic that ended up with serious implications. Alcohol also has a ton of empty calories. I was never much of a carbonated beverage person pre-op so not sure how to answer that. I know that I did this surgery for a reason and have tried very hard to stay on point with any recommendations my doctors have made. I have been told that you have a year to get the maximum results then, after that you can and will still lose but it will be more difficult as your body has adjusted. I don't know if that is true or not. I was no told no fluids 30 minutes after as it can wash the food out of your system an you are already malabsorbing. Finally, take your vitamins faithfully, eat protein first, drink your fluids and monitor your weight. I was advised that one I reach goal weight I can be less strict with food HOWEVER only allow a five pound regain before going back to basics and losing it again so it does not get out of control. For me personally, I am thinking that would be a slippery slope to let the bad habits creep in every day of the week. Folks have regained all they have lost and I don't want to be one of those folks.