Taking Time off work

Hi,

I was hoping to get some advise on how to tell your co-workers and boss about your surgery.

we're a pretty small group so I know they'll notice when I'm gone for surgery. (hopefully in May) 

I was planning to tell them that I was going to get some other type of surgery but I kinda feel bad lying to them.

What reactions should i expect? I'm nervous.

The amount you tell is completely up to you.

All you really need to do is to say that you will need some time off for a medical procedure --- and if asked anything else, you can say that you do not feel comfortable giving details.

If you qualify for short-term disability,  you will have some paperwork you need to fill out ----- but you do NOT have to disclose the surgery type to your employer.

You will submit the paperwork to the Insurance company that provides your disability  -- and they will work with the doctor to see if you qualify ---- if you do, then they contact your employer and tell them that you qualify -- and you will be paid for your time off (based on the type of policy you have).

You will not be able to work at all, or return to work early if you are taking disability -- without their approval.

Some people are 'open books' and tell all ---- their choice.

Some prefer more privacy -- and want to keep it quiet --- or at least not discuss it prior to their surgery -- their choice.

I, personally did not lie -- but I did not disclose what I was having done.  As a matter of fact, when I started to tell my boss that I needed time off for surgery -- he actually said, "say no more -- I don't want any details, that is not my business".

He helped me file the paperwork, and he wished me well -- but he knew from an HR perspective that he has no right to my personal, medical information.

Hi Kath,

thank you so much for your input.

this was all really helpful. :)

I have only told a select few. The others don't need to know until its over with. I find that telling people opens everything up for more opinions.

On another note, you can always 'tell', but you can never 'Un-tell'.

It seems like everyone knows someone whose brother's, cousin's, uncle's hairdresser had 'the surgery' and died or gained all their weight back, blah, blah, blah.

I didn't want to deal with that, or with the scrutiny of people watching me eat ....... So, I kept it private.

Since I don't know your boss or your coworkers, I have no idea what reactions to expect.  You'd have a better idea than I would about that, since you do know them.

If you don't want to tell them what kind of surgery you are having, I recommend just saying "I am having surgery."  I do not recommend lying.  If they ask what kind of surgery, you can just say "It's personal.  I'd rather not talk about it. Thanks for understanding."

If you do want to tell them, just say "I am having weight loss surgery.  I will need to be off work from this date 'til this date."

For me, I told everyone, because I figured that I'd be dropping weight very quickly (and I have).  I knew that rumors would be going around, whether it was me having surgery, or getting sick, or whatever.  Plus, I took two weeks off, so again people would have questions.

I understand those who want to keep it private, but I just didn't think it was a good option for me.  My surgery was on a Monday, so the Friday before, at the end of the day, I sent a mass email to everyone explaining what was happening.  That way, I didn't have to listen to anyone's "warning stories" before the surgery.  I'm really grateful that the only feedback I have gotten has been positive, and anyone who is negative towards it is keeping it to themselves. 

To me, keeping it a secret and not telling anyone would feel like I was ashamed of the surgery.  I'm not.  I'm very proud of what I have done.  This has been one of the most positive things I've ever done in my life.  In just under 2 months, I am lighter, healthier, and doing really well.  I had 20 years of dieting failures behind me.  Losing weight was never going to happen without another tool, so I am using it.  It most definitely is not the "easy" way out, and I'm happy to explain to anyone why that is true.

(please note:  I'm not trying to speak for anyone else, and I don't mean to imply everyone who keeps it a secret is ashamed.  That is just my own feelings.  I tend to be pretty private in most areas of my life, so I understand those who want to keep that privacy.  I've worked with most of my coworkers for 10 years now, and very few even knew I was diabetic.)

Thank you so much for your opinion, believe it or not it was really helpful.

I guess i just worry because I work at place where I'm the only overweight person here. im sure they will notice a HUGE difference when i come back. I do worry about what people will say or ask me when i come back though especially if i didn't mention anything. 

the good thing is that i still have time to think about it. :)

thanks again!! and congratulations on your success. :)

wcdaniels,

thanks for the post today. You are really rocking and i'm proud of you.

Robin