How are your kids affected by your WLS? - long

It is probably because she is 5.  Then it will be because she is 6.  And then 7, and then 13, and then 16 and then....

My point is, sometimes we expect them to act like short adults, but their minds do not work that way.  And they do not always behave rationally (you know unlike adults that always make sense).

I have a 3 yr old nephew, an 8 yr old nephew and a 9 yr old niece.  No a one of them have made a single comment about my having lost so much weight.  They still know it is me.  It does not phase them.  But sometimes they act out, cause they are kids.

Most likely it is the start of school and the job change or it is just a 5 yr old.

I suspect you might be right in saying it's the job change thing and the ramp up to starting school again.

And oh yes, I certainly understand the whole "because she is 5" thing! It is what kids do, and on the whole, I'm very glad to see that she is a normal little girl. Their minds are not like ours (thank heavens!) and  I'm very lucky and thankful that she is just the way she is.

Thank you for your input; I really appreciate it.

First of all she's a girl of 5 yrs wise.  She's just tapping into her drama skills.

Second, you've got a lot of variables working here that she can be reacting to.  I seriously doubt that you losing weight is causing her angst.  That being said though, the last thing you want to do is become weight obsessed with her in earshot, or you could create your own anorexic monster at such a fragile age.  Make sure you're focusing on healthy eating and being active.  Those are the only subjects she should be hearing and tuned in on.  This time next year, she won't even remember your "old" outer shell.

Oh yes, drama skills with a capital "D" goin' on all up in here! *snaps fingers* This girl definitely has those mad skillz (as my teenage stepkids would say).

I make it a conscientious point NOT to be weight obsessed around her. I focus on activity, exercise, eating healthy foods with the occasional treat thrown in for good measure. We are being careful with it though, because she has my body shape and type and at only 5, she is already overweight. We have to watch her quite carefully -- she favours junk food over fruits and veggies, like all kids do -- and we try to ensure the focus is on HEALTH not on FAT. Just last week, she was called "fat" by one of her classmates... for the first time ever. I vividly recall how much that hurts and I'm trying to make sure she is on the right track with activities and getting outside to play.

I appreciate your reply. Thanks so much for taking the time to give me your input.

I had concerns about my son's weight when he was young before I discovered he grew like an inchworm.  He would pudge up a little, then stretch back out and grow taller.  Today's he's 20 and very atheletic, so my worries are over.  He was 11 when I had my DS, though.  He would hug me to see how close he could get to touching his hands behind me.  I got a kick out of it.  We ate meat and vegetables for dinner, two veggies instead of the customary potato/noodle/rice side dish that used to accompany dinner.  Fortunately, a couple of years later, his wrestling coach was making that suggestion to the team to help maintain weight, and he was very pleased to realize that we'd been eating "wrestling approved' all along. 

This has been on my mind too. I just had VSG 5 weeks ago. I am noticing that my 5 year old is acting out in school. I do believe it stems from the move to kindergarten. I'm really hoping that his behavior will get in control in the next month or two. We have to be patient! 

Patience is a virtue, right?

I hope your five-year old settles into routine soon. Here, my daughter was in full-time junior kindergarten last year and this year it's full-time senior kindergarten. So there was no 'going to school' for the first time, but rather a return to the old pattern. I think she may have been a bit anxious about that, but it seems to have settled a bit in the last day or two. Thank heavens! Fingers crossed for your five-year old too.

I agree with the others who have said this likely has nothing to do with your surgery. I will be three years out this week, and the only way surgery affected my children is that the Cake and Cookie Fairy comes to visit far less often.

I love this! "The Cake and Cookie Fairy"... perfect!

We do have a ravenous teenage boy in the house (my stepson) and as such, there's quite a selection of junk as well. I'm able to avoid it easily, but my five-year old daughter loves her junk! It's quite the task to focus her attention to the healthy foods and keep the junk for a Friday night movie or something like that.

I think the Cake and Cookie Fairy may need to hibernate for awhile in my stepson's room or downstairs near his computer. That might keep it out of sight of the little one and with luck, out of sight, out of mind! Thank you so much for your response.

I don't think this has anything to do with your weight loss surgery but a whole lot to do with something you said in points 2:

So he is learning to fit into our evening routine. Sometimes this is stressful for all of us.

and 3:

Is she thinking, "Wow, this isn't what my mommy used to look like." Or maybe, "My mommy used to have softer arms to lie on." Or even something like, "Why is Mommy's hair short now? It used to be longer." (I had a pixie cut done when my hair started coming out at three months post-op.)

I'm sure she's a gorgeous, lovely little girl, but is she the only child?    It should be that SHE gets to fit in with the rest of the household, particularly the adults  If she doesn't get that she is NOT the center of the family universe at this stage - good luck when she's a teenager!

I think she's asserting her power and she maybe has a little too much at 5 - pushing boundaries is what children do best.   Enforcing them is what parents do best.   She will never get to have that power outside of your home and that will be confusing to her - I'm sure there are one or two others in her class that think they are the center of their universe too - why I would not want to be a Kindy/1st grade teacher LOL