What do you Think When a family member sez to you , You looked better when you were fatter?

huskergalWsD
on 7/11/14 9:19 am

My Step mother that is 84 years old told me this. She is fit very well for many years, she weighs 100 lbs at 5'2...Its funny I use to say the same thing to myself before she said this to me.My face looks to sucken in and my shoulder blade bones are so sunken in that I look awful in my opinion, however I would not change my weight loss for anything. I can imagine my life at age 57 with my bad knees and over 300 lbs.I would be so chair bound that life would suck.I would just be existing.

 

I know this has been said to many people with lots of weight loss , with or without wls. would it bother you if someone said this to you after lots of weight loss? It does make me think.. Not sure what they are thinking really after saying that.She has known me for over 25 years of weighing over 300 lbs. I would think she would have been more positive at my weight loss. I would have loved to hear her say I am beautiful after my weight loss. So I am still doing this maintaining all on my own no family support or from anyone since day 1, and I am proud of myself and still amaze myself after all these years......PeaceV ...Wendy

                              
7stents (2003)...Heart Attack(2004)...Open Heart (2004)....Wls (2007)...Heart attack 2012...1 stent (2012)...Heart Attack (2013)...Heart Attack (2013)...1 stent(2013)
~~~Best Vitamin For Making Friends  B1~~~

Gwen M.
on 7/11/14 12:04 pm
VSG on 03/13/14

"Oh, that's nice stepmom."  

Do you have friends who are supportive even if your family isn't?  

VSG with Dr. Salameh - 3/13/2014
Diagnosed with Binge Eating Disorder and started Vyvanse - 7/22/2016
Reconstructive Surgeries with Dr. Michaels - 6/5/2017 (LBL & brachioplasty), 8/14/2017 (UBL & mastopexy), 11/6/2017 (medial leg lift)

Age 42 Height 5'4" HW 319 (1/3/2014) SW 293 (3/13/2014) CW 149 (7/16/2017)
Next Goal 145 - normal BMI | Total Weight Lost 170

TrendWeight | Food Blog (sort of functional) | Journal (down for maintenance)

kathie1212
on 7/11/14 12:11 pm - Stoney Creek , Canada

This  Is just rude However I find People that are  elderly can really be outspoken. Like u said in your post you feel great your not chair bound and doing well. I looked at your photos and I don't think u look all sunken in or boney or whatever.  YOUR BEAUTIFUL!  A lot healthier with out the weight. Family can be brutal my mom got  all over me about having made this decision and because of that I have told so very few people. Chin up and enjoy your mobility :)

camfam99
on 7/11/14 12:13 pm
RNY on 09/04/13

My husband tells me all the time that it seems like I felt better when I was heavier.  I am down 150 pounds in almost one year.  He is very supportive of my decision and what I have accomplished. He just wishes that I could eat a little more, in his opinion that would make me feel better, lol. It about killed him this evening when he ordered pizza and I didn't eat any of it, even though the temptation about killed me.

 

TexasTerritory
on 7/11/14 7:42 pm
VSG on 07/22/13
Very interesting question. You know, I would never tell my skinny daughter that she would look better fat. Wonder why people think they can tell me that I looked better fat--happened to me too. A co-worker said I now look like I am on death's doorstep. Uh, so sorry that I ruined her day -- not!

  

56sunShine14
on 7/12/14 1:24 am

If THIS (your pic) is what you look like on death's doorstep, sign me up!!!!!

  All posts that I make on this site, any forum, are a result in my having experience and caring for anyone having to go through life as an obese person. If you have medical issues, please see your doctor for medical advice.

 

Karen

    
TexasTerritory
on 7/12/14 1:57 am
VSG on 07/22/13
Thank you so much!

  

HarvestMoon1974
on 7/12/14 6:09 am - Keyport, NJ
Revision on 05/01/14

Right? She looks fantastic!

" Life is a roller coaster, enjoy the ride"
Carol 378/189/170

Thankful for my little miracles Joshua and Daniel.

        

    

Laura in Texas
on 7/11/14 10:19 pm

Old people are funny. Just do the old "nod and smile" technique.

No one has said that to me, but at my age I really do not let what other people think bother me. I do my best to make myself happy and that is what is important to me. As the saying goes, "Opinions are like ******** Everybody has one."

Laura in Texas

53 years old; 5'7" tall; HW: 339 (BMI=53); GW: 140 CW: 170 (BMI=27)

RNY: 09-17-08 Dr. Garth Davis

brachioplasty: 12-18-09 Dr. Wainwright; lbl/bl: 06-28-11 Dr. LoMonaco

"May your choices reflect your hopes and not your fears."

Karen M.
on 7/11/14 11:07 pm - Mississauga, Canada

I consider the source - a comment from an 84 year old who is and has been thin for life would not affect me too much. As others have pointed out, elderly people sometimes say things without the filter you or I may use before speaking. :)

As an aside, I am happy (and a little surprised) to see you posting that you would not change your weight loss for anything, are proud of yourself, amaze yourself, etc, considering the many, consistent posts you've made on this board, the RNY board, the Surgery Regrets board, etc, etc, etc about how much you wish you had never had the surgery and how much trouble its caused you in your life and with your health.

 

Karen

Ontario Recipes Forum - http://www.obesityhelp.com/group/ontario_recipes/

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