What do you think about old "fat" pictures?

I'm sure everyone has a different opinion on this so here is mine.  I am curious what everyone else thinks.

I always liked who I was but was always sad that my weight kept me back from so much.  I am so glad I had the opportunity to have surgery when I was relatively young.  Even though I feel almost "protective" of the person I was pre-surgery, because she dreamed of who I could become now and had the guts to do it, I don't like my old pictures.

They make me sad.  Not that my life was bad before.  But photographs do capture my least favorite quality from back then.  And instead of triggering a nice memory of the friend I'm posing with or the vacation it was taken on, it instead fills me with memories of all the insecurities I had.  The absolute agony of having to take a picture.  The tugging at my clothing, pulling up and down to try and hide that extra 126lbs.  For whatever reason, they just make me sad.  

I was only morbidly obese after a difficult pregnancy - I had WLS 11 months later and so the pictures from that time make me both happy (for the birth of my lovely baby) and sad for who I was and how I felt for those months.

I never share those before pictures because I don't feel like they were me ...

I think they are a good reminder for me. They remind me to continue to eat mindfully and not ever veer away from my plan. I certainly do not want to look that way again, so when I look at the old pictures of me, it just strengthens my resolve to keep on keepin' on. 

Are they my favorite things in the world? Well no, but my old pictures don't really make me sad. 

Before pictures?  What are those.  I have only one real before picture and that was taken the night before my first WLS, when I truly thought it would be the last time I would be morbidly obese.  I was wrong but there are no later pictures of me obese.

Even in my older pictures I avoided the camera when I was obese.  There are a few with my babies but I was pretty hidden and the baby was the focus.

There is also one picture of me exactly one month before my revision but I am sitting down and you can only see my face, which was obviously bloated.

Now of course I wish I had more, just to remind myself.  I have found that it is easy to fool myself when looking in a mirror but when it came to pictures there was no denying the extra pounds.

Many of mine have gone to the paper shredder.  There is no reason to hang on to pictures that make me sad.  I decided what I wanted to save for family memories and what I no longer wanted to be remembered for.

I'm only down about 80 pounds, but I can't feel sad or unhappy when I see pictures.  I know that I was happy when they were taken, I've always loved my life.  I've never really hated my body even though society has said I should.  

Maybe it'll change with time, but I'd be surprised.  

My father would take photographs and throw them in our face.  It was about power and control.  I threw out all of my old pictures.  When ppl want pictures of me, I always say remember me with your eyes.  One's eyes are the best cameras. 

Andrew

Andrew,

How old were you?

J.

I'm so sorry that you had this experience.  

I'm right there with you. I used to be angry at myself for gaining the weight, but have truly forgiven myself. My old picture hold no power over me. I also like who I was then and who I am now. My obese years helped me become who I am today and I am proud of the person I am. I embrace all periods of my life. I believe it is a big part of why I have been successful in keeping the weight off.