If you are getting ready to have weight loss surgery please read.

I am kind of taking this a little personal.  Please read all the post from the person about 8 subjects down.  MY BEST FRIEND HAD WEIGHT LOSS SURGERY AND I AM AFRAID SHE IS LOSING TOO MUCH.   I had my surgery 8 years ago and this really hit home with me.  People wonder why weightloss patients don't tell.  This will give you a little insight.  You are either too fat or too skinney.  My own mother called everyone of my children including my son in law to talk me out of it.  I did it only for health issues.  The more I gained the less I could do, the less I could do the more I gained.  I had a big back surgery in my future.  I ate very little and still gained weight.  Take a minute to check out my blog.  Also my avitar photo is when I was a little too thin.  My blog will show you how I have held my weight for the last 5 years at 123.  I look healthy.  Nobody even knows I have had the surgery that I met in last 7 years.  I look like a normal person.  Feel a heck of a lot better.  I just think you need to read this to know what to be prepared for.  It happens.  You find out who your friends are.  I am very unlucky with genetics.  My grandmother was 4x4.  4 ft tall and 4 ft wide.  My mother was heavy and growing.  I saw my future.  I caught it before it was too bad.  I was 223 lbs.  I have lost 100 lbs.  Sometimes it is lower sometimes higher.  I just want preop people to be prepared.  I also kept a blog of my journey.  Hope you take a minute to look at it.

I am pre op and would love to read your blog , please send me the link. Jessica

http://www.obesityhelp.com/member/steffan467/  If you click on a persons name it should show you their blog.  It always use to  If I can help in any way let me know.  My blog starts at the beginning and tells how I felt when I was in pre op.

Brenda

wow I was really telling my feelings back then.   http://www.obesityhelp.com/member/steffan467/uzone,blog/acti on,view/blog_id,87587/blog_page,9/  there you go this is the very beginning of my journey.  I was really good at blogging how I felt then.

Sure, there are people who have others talk about them, but it doesn't happen to everyone. I have had exactly one person question my decision to have WLS, and I put a swift end to that. I make it absolutely clear that I do not and will not tolerate anyone second guessing my decisions. I have no trouble outsourcing anyone who doesn't respect that I am an adult and perfectly capable of steering my own ship.

Yes, there are times when people will express concern to postops about losing too fast or too much, but most of that is a perception issue in comparison to our morbidly obese selves. The post you reference does raise some red flags in the description of the amount of food the post op eats, but as mostly everyone pointed out, we have too little information on which to go.

I am open about my surgery because I believe the more light we shine on morbid obesity and the treatment options, the less it will be treated like a shameful secret. For those who are not comfortable disclosing personal information, a simple "I prefer not to discuss that" or even a fulminating glare will stop all but the most persistent inquisitors. For those, a hearty "Mind your own" can be liberally applied.

I read the thread that you reference and the person received a lot of good information and suggestions from other members.  Whether to have WLS or not, whether to tell certain people or no one at all, and those types of issues can be so emotionally charged.  I had a friend that was very judgmental about me having WLS - yet one year later she had it herself!

I only told three people - my husband and two of my best friends.  My husband was supportive and awesome about it, one best friend (yes, the judgmental one that had it a year later) made me wish I hadn't told her and the second best friend was supportive about it. 

I'm glad that I told only a few people at the beginning.  I had made my decision and I didn't want to hear the horror stories, reasons why I shouldn't have it and their reasons why I shouldn't have it.  As I lost and people asked, I told them I'd had WLS.  By that time, it was too late to tell their horror stories or hear their reasons.  I'd had it done and the results were showing. 

I read a lot of posts on OH that helped me make my decision plus how to handle certain people that decided I was getting too thin, eating too little and became my food police.  The best suggestion I read was to let them know I was regularly seeing my surgeon and his after-care team, and that I was fine and healthy.  They couldn't say much more after that.

You've had amazing success with your surgery.  I really like your photo with your son.  That photo is worth many more than a thousand words.  Congrats!

Yes, I did the same thing.  On here all the time.  I had read stories of friends becoming jealous and I did use a lot of the things I learned here.  You were smart to wait and tell people.  I thought people knew how bad my back was and would be so supportive.  I found the people that were around me the most, knew how I felt physically, were the most supportive.  You know how some women are...... they are jealous you have prettier shoes, prettier this and that, I actually think sometimes it is jealousy.   OH is a great place to get support and information.  You really look great also.  How much did you lose.  Going to see if you have photo's up.

Brenda 

I had surgery 10 years ago next month and am yet to have anyone say anything negative to me.  

I believe you teach people how to treat you and I honestly don't invite people in my life to be negative towards me.   I am a strong and intelligent woman and have never had any doubts about my decision to have WLS - maybe it's why noone has ever thought it necessary to worry about me or make derogatory comments to me?

I don't think anyone should have to prepare for people to treat them like crap - how about we prepare pre-ops to own their decision and not invite derogatory comments?

I'm with Kim on this.  I disclosed my decision to have surgery to anyone who asked/didn't ask because in the long run, I don't care what their opinion is.  People treat you how you let them treat you.  I've had no negative comments (yet) and pity the fool who tries. 

I had this surgery because I wasn't ready to give up and die and get buried in a piano case.  How can anyone fault you for taking a proactive stance towards better health?  

I must of come across wrong.  That is what I was doing.  Preparing pre ops to own their decision and be prepared to handle situations like that.  I am totally with you on that Kim and sorry if I made it sound like let people treat you like crap.  I owned my decision and let them know didn't matter what they thought.  A certain person still says don't you feel depressed you can't eat a whole whopper.  lol  She said that one time to me and I set her straight.  Really would you rather be unhealthy and eat a whole whopper or be healthy and thinner and happy.  No hamburger has ever made me as happy as it does to go to the smaller sections of clothing and they fit.

Brenda