Calling on Vets

I have read so many tips and suggestions over the course of the last few months trying to prepare for VSG in two weeks, however I know often times NOTHING can prepare you until you are fully in the trenches!  I am still a believer in listening to someone who has walked the path before you,  even though you maybe veer off and explore a little bit differently from time to time. In the end I think we want the same outcome. How we get there might be a little bit different. You still can learn from each other.

I know from lurking since December it seems like I have seen some posts/ tips from what I thought were from Vets. ( More than a few years out that have really worked hard.) I know that many of them have support from families and their program support groups.

What I want to know is if you consider yourself a VET, have you ALWAYS contributed to OH? Did you stay active on the message board from the start? I wondered if you felt like it impacted you because you found it before surgery or after? or it didn't play a role? When did you find it?

Do you think the board is another way to be accountable in some way?

I know it is up to "us" and everything is just a tool, but I wanted to hear your experience with the board. I just know that some of you seem very active with the board and wondered if it has always been that way since you have been able to keep your weight off. Thanks for sharing!

A very common pattern is to come a lot at the beginning when you are full of questions. Then, if things go smoothly, drop off a bit as life just carries on. Some people hang around for a while to help others as they were helped themselves. Most people seem to take a break at some stage, many return later.

lots of reasons for coming:-

to learn

to support others

to question

to be with people *****ally understand

To "talk" to people who don't judge (that one sometimes goes a bit wrong, but mostly not)

and you make friends! With big gaps, I have been on here for 8 1/2 years. Long enough to really feel I have friends. I even met up with some when I visited the US and I am in contact with others outside OH.

For some people it is their only support group

Yep what Kate said I've also been around nearly everyday (even in the hospital) for around 8 years. Kate is one of the friends I've made here and a sweetie to boot. I just find eveyones posts interresting and If I can help I'm glad to. We all have a little different journey so everyone has a different story to tell. At first I used it for information, then support and then to pay it forward. After awhile it gets a bit addictive, maybe I have transfer addiction to OH. I also have the luxury of not having to work so I have lots of time to hang out here.

My surgery was in December of 2008.  I was on the boards extensively before and right after, then life happened and I took a break.   Actually a couple of breaks. 

But I keep coming back.  I stay awhile and then disappear again -  I want to pay it forward but sometimes I get distracted.  There are some here  who are always here when I come back:  Kate, Lora, Kelly, Laura in Texas and others are really good at keeping up a presence and helping newbies.

I do think it's a way to be accountable - I just relost a 40+lb regain and logging on here helped - but I think more than that it's just a committment to helping others as we were helped.  I"m gonna try to hang around for awhile this time.  I was given SO much info when I was preop and newly postop that I really want to give back. 

This board has helped me a lot.  There are others (boards) , but they don't have the same feel.

Best of luck to you on your journey!

I joined OH in May of 2007, had my surgery in August of 2007, and have been here ever since.  The board has changed a lot, but I learned a lot from some of the people who were "vets" when I got here and that is part of the reason that I have stayed.  Some surgeons provide very little information to their patients and some give downright WRONG information (like the "soda will stretch your pouch" nonsense for RNYers)... and, as with all things, there is lots of garbage info on the internet, so if people cannot get good information here, they may not get it at all.

I also stay here to give support, especially because I think it is important to both give and get "support" in the form of honest feedback and/or a kick in the ass when necessary, NOT just getting your hand patted and reassured that everything will be fine when you (general "you", not you personally, of course!) are, in fact, screwing up and need a reality check.

I also stay because I am passionate about the need for people to address the psychological aspects of the journey, not just the scale aspect.  I can respond as just another WLS person but can draw on my professional experience and education. Most people don't get to be morbidly (or super morbidly) obese without a psychological/emotional component to their overeating.  If they don't address the issue(s), those demons will pop back up down the road and make maintaining the weight loss difficult.

Finally, I stay because it does help keep me mindful (but not "accountable").  I come here and read posts from people who are experiencing regain and it reminds me that, even though I am almost 7 years out, regain is still a very real possibility if I get lackadaisical. Just being here reminds me that this is a lifelong journey, not something that ends once you finish losing.

There are also some down sides to being here for a long time, though.  Reading some of the same freaking posts over and over and over and over... some of them literally posted almost every day (the early post-op stall") can make me feel like my head is going to explode. (Well, I never actually open those posts anymore, but you can often tell just from the post title what it is about, and even seeing the title makes my head hurt.)  

After a number of years, you also learn to recognize the signs of people who are likely to disappear about 6 months post-op and then reappear at 2 years out to say they have regained 30 pounds.  It is frustrating to try to warn someone that they may be headed for trouble and them have them reject the warning in favor of people who will pat their hand and tell them their behavior (or food choices or whatever) is ok and "you've got this!". At least I (and the other vets) can say that I tried...

Lora

Thank you all for sharing! It gave me a lot to think about! It gave me some more insight from the vets.