What was that ONE big reason?

My doctor asked me if I had ever considered it...so I fired him.  At the time I thought WLS was super dangerous and only for people whose lives were in immediate danger.  My next doctor asked me the same question, so I started doing research. 

At first I assumed I'd have the lapband but doing research ruled that out fairly quickly.  In doing that initial research, I came across the concept of the sleeve.  A year later (and so many appointments later!), I'm getting my sleeve June 17!

Health.

I wanted to see my grand kids grow up.  That would have never happened if I didn't do this.....

This is a great question, and so complicated for me. There were so many reasons. I was type 2 diabetic on 90 units of Lantis insulin injected every day. I had high blood pressure, high cholesterol and major depression (since I was a child) and was on medication for all of these. I was in a size 22 which were tight on me. I had just turned 50 and had never ever been anything but overweight in my whole life. I've loved clothes since I was a very young child. I learned to sew and do needlework when I was 7. I made clothes for all my dolls (even for my trolls… remember the original trolls?!). But I couldn't wear any pretty clothes like Marcia, Jan and Cindy on the Brady Bunch wore. I went to Catholic school my whole life and had to have my uniform specially made.

But I think the ONE huge reason I got the surgery was because I felt like I was SETTLING for a mediocre (really more like below-average) life. In SO MANY WAYS. I've been married for decades, and I've had a tumultuous marriage, and I felt trapped because I didn't have the courage as a fat woman to get out there and get my degree, get a good job, and get away from toxic relationships. I also felt like my husband treated me badly because I was fat. I felt like if I were attractive, he'd wake up and realize that I've been a good wife to him and a good mother to his son, and I've really sacrificed my life. The hurts just piled up inside me, one on top of the other. Many of these feelings might not make sense to others, but I'm being honest.

I went on a cruise for my 50th birthday. My husband is a workaholic (would he be if he had a cute wife to come home to?) and a cheapskate. He would never travel. I traveled alone when I traveled at all. I paid for the whole cruise for the both of us. We went to New England and Canada for 9 days. It was heaven… and hell. I was so heavy… I remember one night (formal night) I was so happy and excited in my pretty formal dress (HUGE size). After dinner I was standing at the elevator (of course I didn't take the stairs ever, up OR down) and I saw myself in the mirror. Oh my gosh. I looked like I was 9 months pregnant. My belly was so distended I hardly recognized myself. It was the most depressing thing.

I think it was body dysmorphic disorder (BDD), when you don't SEE what you really look like. I felt so pretty and cute and bubbly (sometimes), and then I'd see a photo of myself and go, "oh My GAHD that's ME?! I went out in PUBLIC looking like that? I thought I looked so pretty that night!" and I'd be depressed for weeks. So that night on that cruise ship on my 50th birthday, I decided I was going to have weight loss surgery. I was going to take it one step at a time and do WHATEVER IT TOOK to have the me that was on the inside be shown to the world on my OUTSIDE. That was August 2010. I had open RNY on 2/28/2012.

Off all meds except the anti-depressants. Still haven't made all the changes I want to make in my life. But I have changed SO MUCH (not just through WLS, but other changes I've made in my life, one step at a time), inside and out. I want to be absolutely dizzyingly crazily madly IN LOVE WITH MY LIFE. THAT was the huge reason I got WLS.

Thanks for making me really do some deep reflection, Sarah!

This answer was so inspiring to me.  It made me tear up because I know all too well what you described.  Thank you so much for sharing your story. 

After my first daughter, we discovered that my mother has cardiomyopathy.  We did a baseline test on me, and at age 34, they told me that I had it, too.

My heart is already working really hard to do its job.  I feel that it is in my best interest to do all I can to lighten its load...literally.

I took the meds, and it actually resolved.  I went off the meds (doctor's recommendation) because with my second pregnancy, they lowered the dose so much that I wasn't taking a therapeutic dose.  (And pregnancy can cause cardiomyopathy.  I had a perfectly normal pregnancy and the 10 or so echocardiograms said my heart was doing fine!)  I was going for yearly exams.  I had one in September.  Everything was fine.  At my physical this January, my PCP heard something that had me go back to the cardiologist.  It's back, a little better than at its worst.  But it only strengthened my resolve to move forward with my planned surgery.

It took me seven years to get to here, and I'm so glad I did it.  I feel like I have a real chance now.

I have a childhood friend named Melissa. Melissa and I were both chubby girls and that gave us something in common. As we grew up, Melissa slimmed down while I got bigger and bigger. Melissa had an older sister who was always skinny and gorgeous and I always envied her beauty and figure...we would make fun of her because she was always looking at herself in the mirror and had tons of boyfriends. I don't know what happened to Melissa's sister, but somehow, over the last 10 years...she just got huge. Enormous. I'm 350lbs and she was easily twice my size.

She started out feeling tired and lethargic one morning, and then she started having trouble breathing by mid-afternoon...and within a couple of hours she collapsed and fell. She was rushed to the emergency room and they stabilized her...but that night her organs started failing. Within a few days, she was dead. She was 46. She left behind an amazing husband and 2 young children. That could have been me. That could be anyone of us who are MO or SMO.

It was an eye opener to hear that she just simply died. Her body just couldn't take it any more and it broke down. Then I saw how Melissa had to deal with this after their mother had died just a year before (in the same month even). All alone...trying to find a funeral home that could handle the remains of her gigantic sister's body.

The cemetery said she would need to buy 2 plots and referred her to a company that could special order an extra large coffin. The coffin would cost six thousand dollars, would require 8-10 people to carry it and would not fit through a standard singe doorway (so she would have to find a funeral home or church with wide enough doors) or fit into a hearse and would have to be transported by truck (and/or forklift).

So, her next option was cremation. This was also very expensive compared to what services would cost for a normal size body. The person she talked to was very thorough and explained in gruesome detail that a large body requires an extra large cremation chamber which they did not have. They could possibly dissect the body into pieces, but fat burns twice as hot as lean tissue and takes twice as long to burn, which can create safety issues with equipment not made to handle the higher heat and extended burn duration, so there would be a significant added expenses.

Can you imagine??

So, first of all, I'm 41. I don't want to die any time soon or suddenly like she did. Secondly, I don't want my family to have to spend thousands of dollars trying to find a way to handle my remains. Funerals are difficult enough without the added trauma of having to make arrangements that involve forklifts.

Wow that is so incredibly sad, I had no idea it was so difficult but it all makes perfect sense.  My good friends dad died about 12 or 13 years ago and he was 500lbs and I know they had to buy an extra wide coffin, but I don't recall it being an issue, or if it was my friend never mentioned it.  Seeing his big coffin really scared us all straight, his daughter (my friend) had wls, his ex-wife (my friends mom) had wls, her new husband had wls, and two of one of my friends brothers had wls, plus two of their wives, and I had it.  What an impact that very sad funeral caused on a lot of lives, he wasn't very old when he died, maybe mid 50's.  But his legacy of MO has been held in check by wls.  Thankfully.

That is such a scary thought.  I can't imagine putting that burden on my family after I have passed.  I also can't believe they can charge so much for cremation just because the person is heavier.  Thank you for sharing this story!

My one big reason was a combination of things, but let's just say that as I was approaching my 50s, I saw my life circling the drain in all aspects.  It was at that point that I knew I had to do something much more aggressive to give myself a chance for permanent weight loss. I told my internist somewhat jokingly that I was at the point where I probably needed to have surgery to deal with my weight, and he said, "Yes I agree.".  He then gave me the name of a surgeon to see.  That surgeon performed my surgery and it was one of the best decisions I have ever made.  Between that and my knee replacement surgery, I am mobile again and healthier than I have been in a while.  I look forward to turning 50 now, and maybe one day I will still complete that ultra marathon that is on my bucket list.